(ThyBlackMan.com) Hypocrisy is such an ugly state of mind and being. It inflicts known harm in spaces whereby there should be love, compassion, grace, and mercy. You see, everyone wants these things for themselves, and some demand it, while offering absolutely none to others. There is plenty of discussion about what our community needs to grow. One of the things we will need is for Women of God to be sisters to one another in love. There are too many feeling they have a heaven or hell to put another in. The shaming of each other…while demanding compassion is dangerous, and devastating. When we look at everything going on in the world there are generations, yes more than the current, of sistahs hurting within the church because they have been basically told they are hell bound.
It doesn’t matter your station in the church or community, allow us to let you in on a known truth: you can’t choose hell for another sistah. You don’t have the power to condemn a single soul, and the empty threat doesn’t bring one to the alter. Fear has never been the path to repentance and too many of us want to play God in this instance. Everyone has a different story, or testimony in the making, to tell. When we speak down in other women often times, we don’t truly know them…nor do we care to know. There comes a point whereby too many of us seem to have a condescending spirit now that we “saved & sanctified”; it’s as though we forgot the reality of the testimony we love to give. It seems to many of us forgot the pain of being traumatized, hurt, rejected, and basically broken.
So many have endured the very damnation and hypocrisy that is now given so freely to those sistahs not deemed saved enough, or righteous enough. We can speak about the men in the church and their unrealistic, unbiblical, one sided expectation of women. Yet, how can we truly deal with that when we are one of the deepest sources of church hurt towards each other. In an effort to get one’s life together, some sistahs walk into hell every Sunday as they are judge and sentence by the eyes and words of their own sistahs in the Faith. At some point we must hold ourselves accountable to walk in both love and patience towards each other.
If we really want to see the lives of our sistahs turn around and see them grow we must lead with love. This is not to say don’t hold a sistah accountable, but we can do so in love. We’ve got to stop telling each other “You’re going to hell”. We’ve got to stop putting those that are already hurting in spiritual fear. Better yet, it would make some run away from the church; why would I want to serve a God that beats me when I’m down…it’s a fair question. My dear sistahs everyone did not grow up in church, and some of us that did know that there is always a need for deliverance, repentance, grace, and mercy in the church. So many women are in need of care, and genuine kindness. It seems in the fuss and battle for the perceived moral high ground the art to kindness is missing. For all the scripture that can be recited, God’s message of love appears to be missing.
Taking the time to talk to the sistahs in need, or at the very least keeping one’s mouth off them, allows you to see them as one of God’s children. You might even see a previous version of yourself which means you might actually know how to reach the woman you’re talking to. The bottom line is fire & brimstone simply do not work. Many of our sistahs are walking around feeling as though they ate not living, and this can cause us to attend untimely funerals. In those spaces everyone will want to know what happened…well, too many felt hell was more important than love. Too many felt it was their duty, and their right, to condemn what they perceived trying to play God.
When the hell and hypocrisy begins to flow it sets the stage for more strife amongst women, and more distrust. There has to come to a point where we acknowledge the damage we are doing to each other emotionally and spiritually. This requires an accountability too many dodge at all costs. None of us walking are without fault, it would do our community good for us to be mindful of that truth. You can’t choose hell for a sistah, and you shouldn’t want to. Let’s give the love, grace and mercy we ourselves need.
Staff Writer; Chelle’ St James
One may also connect with this sister via Twitter; ChelleStJames. Also, feel free to email her at; ChelleSJ@ThyBlackMan.com.