(ThyBlackMan.com) The truth is, you aren’t going to be happy in every situation. Not liking a situation doesn’t make you bad, incompetent or unprofessional, nor it makes you lose anything. All you need is to gain control over the situation you are in. And even if it is not possible to take control of things that include other people, you have to take control of yourself, your thoughts, your decisions, and actions.
Here are 5 ways to deal with a situation you hate.
1. Learn to accept
Why so many people remain in the same grief-cycle because they are doing it over and over again. They don’t just accept what happened to them, instead, they go through the same stage of shock, pain, anger, guilt, denial, and justification. Don’t wait for things to 
change automatically, accept the situation and take necessary action. You can drag a situation for as long as you want, but it makes no sense. If your thoughts are stuck in a stressful loop, you can’t expect to see positive results.
2. Focus on the experience
If your relationship failed, perhaps the lesson here is to become more independent. If you lost your job, focusing on the reasons and determining a path is now more important. If someone betrayed you, be more careful with people next time. If you focus on the life-lesson you learn from a hard situation, you come out of it as a better person.
It’s easy to get attached to people, and it’s easy to fall in love with the path you choose. When someone or something throws you off, you may feel depressed, disconnected or shocked. But such unexpected events may teach you that there’s always a way. There’s always a chance to turn bad into good by fixing problems or by learning a lesson.
3. Closing the gaps
Whether you’re among strangers or there’s a bad silence between you and someone. Silence is not always comfortable and communication gap can feel deafening. In such situations when both the parties are silent, it’s better not to show anger even if the silence feels annoying to you. Stay calm, speak less and let the other person speak more.
Sometimes, silence gives you some answers. Some people can’t instantly think of what they want to speak and they take time before saying something big. If there’s a silence between you and a person, ask questions you want answers for. Instead of continuing the silence and killing the relationship, it’s better to listen and know what the person thinks.
4. Embrace a growth mindset
Throughout the day we talk to ourselves, and most of this talk is related to the situations we encounter. Most of the time, our default reaction to such situations is negative self-talk. When you start living your life with a growth mindset, you can come out of any hard situation and the results will always be positive. With a fixed mindset your goal is to appear smart, but with a growth mindset, you focus on learning and improving. Many of us want to avoid unpleasant situations, but with a growth mindset, we actually seek new challenges and respond to the problems with a learning-oriented approach instead of going into defensive mode.
5. Choose skill and sensitivity over temper
Sometimes dealing with a situation is a waste of energy and time. Some situations don’t really deserve your engagement and energy. If you don’t know how to deal with such situations, ask yourself if the ultimate benefit is worth reasoning for? Are you going to lose more than you could win?
If you can’t avoid being a part of that situation, be soft, but be firm on the issue. If you learn to choose skills and sensitivity over temper, you will always come across as positive. You just have to maintain a decorum, and if you can do this continuously, you will always have an upper hand in every situation you encounter.
Staff Writer; Corey Shaw
Have any Tech Tips? News? Hit up our Tech Guru at; CoreyS@ThyBlackMan.com
