(ThyBlackMan.com) I recently posted a photo to Facebook that I thought was adorable. It was a photo of two children preparing to attend a “Kindergarten Prom.” According to the response, most people had the same reaction to the photo that I did, but because the children were dressed like adults, a handful of people objected to it because they inserted their own sexual attitudes into the mix instead of viewing the event in context. They complained that the dress the little girl was wearing was not “age appropriate.”
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Now, they all seemed like wonderful and well-meaning people, but they completely failed to recognize that the entire point of the event was to give the children the chance to play adult for a day, and to give the parents the joy of seeing what their babies will look like when they actually did become adults – after all, some of those
parents won’t live to see that in reality. The people who complained also failed to recognize the positive benefits of parents and children bonding to enjoy a mutually pleasurable activity together. Instead, they got all worked up over children dressing up like adults in a very innocent and fun-filled way that the children, and their parents, will remember for the rest of their lives.
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My educational background is in psychology, and psychologists would say that the event was an excellent example of parents bonding with their children, and parental bonding is one of the healthiest activities that a parent can engage in with their child. But instead of recognizing that fact, these people became preoccupied with the kids dressing up like adults on a one-time basis as a part of that bonding.
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That’s completely superficial, parochial, and ridiculous thinking. It reminds me of the antiquated thinking of some of the old folks who used to refuse to allow their kids to attend events because they played “THE BLUES” (or Black music) at the event, but they had absolutely no problem with letting their children attend a hootenanny (with White, country music) because they considered it just kids having innocent fun. I remember the frustration of that, because I play saxophone, and I remember how my very God-fearing grandmother used to tell me, “Don’t be playin’ that blues in my house.” Those old folks failed to recognized that their attitudes were simply anti-Black.
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While these people may not see the correlation between these two issues, it’s about mindset. Like the old folks, they fail to see the big picture. My grandmother failed to see that while learning to play the saxophone I was also learning valuable lessons about our culture, and these people are failing to take into account that when these parents invested the time, money, and effort to bond with their children, they were making an investment that would reap huge benefits in the future. The people who complained never stopped to consider that. Instead, they inserted the ugliness of their own sexually dysfunctional attitudes into mix. If they tried to explain their objections to that little girl, she wouldn’t have had any idea what you were talking about.
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or just like the old folks in the past associated innocent fun with “the evils” of Black music, these people are associating HEALTHY parent-child bonding, and the fact that the kids were having the time of their lives playing “dress-up,” with their OWN dysfunctional sexual attitudes. That’s inefficient thinking. It’s the exact same kind of thinking that mindless bigots engage in when they associate Black skin with some negative image that they’ve conjured up in their minds.
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The complainers aren’t thinking, they’re reacting to an emotional response. But it’s very important that Black people learn to think efficiently, because God made birds to fly, fish to swim, and man to think, and the ability to think is what separates man from all other animals (and yes, we’re just another species of animal). But according to their flawed logic, “Wearing a “sexy” dress is whorish, and that little girl is wearing a sexy dress; therefore, the little girl is being whorish.” Or in other words, “All dogs have teeth, and my cat has teeth; therefore, my cat is a dog.”
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Epistemologist (scientist who study efficient thought) would tell them that their thinking is horribly flawed. They’re engaged in making unwarranted assumptions. Just because dogs have teeth and a cat has teeth, doesn’t mean that a cat is a dog. Similarly, just because a child playing “make-believe” is wearing a dress that for some reason they associate IN THEIR MIND with sexuality, doesn’t mean that child is being sexual in any way. They have to take other factors into account, like the reason she’s wearing that dress. Just because Shirley Temple wore a military uniform in the movies, that didn’t make her a soldier.
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Black people have got to start understanding the importance of efficient thinking. We weren’t forced into slavery because the White man could beat us up; we were forced into slavery because the White man had a knowledge of gunpowder and we didn’t. So in order to liberate ourselves we’re going to have to arm ourselves with the ability to think, and use knowledge as our weapon of choice. We can’t out-scream the White man, because he controls the media, and we can’t out-fight him, because we’re only 13.3% of the population, and he controls both the police, and the military. So the only way that we’re ever going to liberate ourselves is through the use of our minds, which means learning to become efficient thinkers. That entails being guided by our intellect, not our emotions. But the response of those who complained about the little girl wearing an adult “costume” was not being guided by their intellect, it by knee-jerk emotionalism. They failed to use their intellect to take context into account. If the little girl wore that dress to a birthday party, yes, it would be inappropriate. But in the context in which she was wearing it, it was perfectly appropriate, and even adorable.
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So the bottom line is, as long as we allow ourselves to be guided by our emotions rather than clear and logical thinking, we’ll be easy targets for manipulation. In addition, it will always prevent us from uniting as a people, because our emotions will always get in the way.
Staff Writer; Eric L. Wattree