(ThyBlackMan.com) In life, the only way to move past your fear and design the life of your dreams is to learn the art of transforming a negative into a positive. We all face negative environments and people. You may be disturbed by the external, but you need not be defeated by it.
Whether it’s relationship, money or career, use the following motivators to turn a negative into a positive.
Motivator#1:
Don’t Create Obstacles Before They Exist
Ever conversed with a person who described their dream and then proceeded to recite a laundry list of everything that could possibly go wrong with the dream? Such a person has lost before the game even begins. While it is one thing to consider possible obstacles, it is quite another to allow those obstacles to remain stuck in your brain alongside your dream.
“Winners make a habit of manufacturing their own positive expectations in advance of the event.”
—Brian Tracy
Instead of coming up with reasons why you likely won’t succeed in any given venture, keep a positive mental attitude and make a list of why you will be successful.
This principle was beautifully illustrated by the story of former college basketball player, Isaiah Austin. Austin grew up dreaming of playing in the NBA. He overcame a series of setbacks in his quest, including an incident in junior high school that left him legally blind in one eye. Austin kept plugging away at his dream. He earned All-American honors at Baylor University and his talent delivered him to the doorstep of NBA hoops. But, just four days before the 2014 NBA draft, Austin’s dream was suddenly snatched from his grip when he was diagnosed with a career-ending medical condition called Marfan syndrome, a rare genetic disorder that would end his basketball career immediately. Most of us would be crushed by this seemingly unfair and sudden set of circumstance, especially when you are so near the finish line of a long-awaited dream. What Isaiah Austin said, though, motivates me every time I think about how tough I may have it: “It’s not the end, it’s only the beginning. Life goes on.”
You can apply that simple philosophy to any given situation: a crumbling relationship, a financial disaster or a negative health report. In the end, it’s always our decision as to whether we form a negative or positive charge.
Motivator#2:
Be the Cause, Not the Effect
If you are going to design the life of your dreams, it is time you no longer oscillate between cause and effect. It’s time to produce the change you desire! By that I mean you must determine the result you wish to obtain in every area of your life and begin to construct the condition by which the effect can be obtained.
We have two choices when met with a negative situation, person or event: we can ‘react against’, which is to give in to hostility, opposition or anger. Or we can ‘respond to’. Reacting short-circuits your mental energy; responding allows you to create more effective strategies to produce the desired effect. If you want to be rich, for example, focus your energy on the cause that produces that effect.
“Shallow men believe in luck; strong men believe in cause and effect.”
—Ralph Waldo Emerson
Remember the old adage ‘life is ten percent what happens and ninety percent how we respond?’ Well it’s true. Set your default response to a positive mental attitude.
Motivator#3:
Tap into Your Comeback Power
Resilience is the ability to recover quickly. Consider the story of the goat that strayed away from its farm and fell into a pit:
The owner observed the goat’s predicament and decided it wasn’t worth the effort to save it. So the farmer got a shovel and began to fill the hole with dirt. The old goat, however, had other ideas. It was not in the mood to give up so easily. When the farmer shoveled dirt down into the pit, the goat would shake it off and stomp it under its feet. With every shovelful, the goat kept shaking it off and stomped the dirt under its feet. After a while, the goat found his freedom by using the dirt to rise to the top.
Somebody gave up on you in much the same way that farmer gave up on that old goat. But I am here to tell you it’s too soon to quit, and that if you keep your head up, and keep using the dirt others or circumstances shovel into your life, you, too, will rise to the top! No situation ever gets as perfect as you like. Life just does not work like that. Roll with the punches. Keep doing and giving your best. Shake off the critics. Silence the inner heckler. Most of all, be thankful for what you have.
Whether it’s relationship, money or career, you can turn a negative into a positive!
Staff Writer; W. Eric Croomes
This talented brother is a holistic lifestyle exercise expert and founder and executive coach of Infinite Strategies LLC, a multi-level coaching firm that develops and executes strategies for fitness training, youth achievement and lifestyle management. Eric is an author, fitness professional, holistic life coach and motivational speaker.
In October 2015, Eric released Life’s A Gym: Seven Fitness Principles to Get the Best of Both, which shows readers how to use exercise to attract a feeling of wellness, success and freedom (Infinite Strategies Coaching LLC, 2015) – http://www.infinitestrategiescoaching.com.