(ThyBlackMan.com) Today, you see it all around you, and you may even participate in it. Not doing what you say. Dismissing that as no big deal. Reneging on promises. Failing to stay true to your word. But there are consequences to such actions that impact the future of your success, or lack there of.
In the African-American community, we must rise much higher to the level of follow-through, commitment, doing what we said we would do. Keeping our word. That cannot just happen if we would lose a job or end up in court or jail. That cannot just happen when we consider something important. That has to be a part of our nature in all that we do. A nature of excellence. An essential part of our character to do whatever we do with all I might, with full intent to follow through.
That is integrity. That is credibility. That is thinking and operating on a higher level. You see, our habits and decisions impact our actions and the results (or consequences) of those actions. A man who is known for keeping his word is likely to be respected by practically everybody, even his enemies. Believe me, I know. But a man (or woman) who does not keep his word is considered unstable, unreliable, untrustworthy and lacking credibility. He cannot be believed because people do not know when he will follow through and when he won’t. Therefore he cannot be trusted.
Too much of this happens in the African-American community and people just shrug it off. Why? Because the standards of expectation are far too low for themselves and others. Is any ethnic group perfect? No, but that can no longer be used as an excuse for poor performance and lack of commitment in the African-American community.
Ironically, many of the people who do not follow through as they committed themselves to doing would be the first to get angry if their employer did not give them the paycheck they were promised on Friday. That brings in the issue of hypocrisy, a character flaw that comes along with its own set of problems as well. Treat people the way you want to be treated. If you want people to keep their commitments to you, then you need to plant that seed everywhere you can, every time you can. Start making the world around you a little more of what it should be, and not just what is being handed to you.
If you are not willing to step up and do what you say you are going to do, why should you actually have the right to expect anyone else to honor their commitments? Do you have the right to expect your employer to pay you when they said they would? Do you have the right to expect the grocery store to close when they told you they were? Do you have the right to expect the police to keep their oaths? Do you have the right to expect the daycare center or the school to look after your children as they said they would? Do you have the right to expect the mechanic or the doctor or the lawyer to do what they said they would do for you? And how would you feel if the lawyer who took your money just didn’t show up in court as he or she said they would?
Before you say “oh that’s different “, you need to know that it’s not different. And if you think it is, you’re just making excuses to justify behavior that will work against you in life.
Recently, I had to fire a young adult male because he didn’t follow through, he didn’t keep his word. That made him unreliable, and therefore untrustworthy. That costs me money. But the irony is that he was angry, as if I had done something wrong. No, what I did was hold him to the standard of what he committed himself to. So you see, people don’t have the right to make you do what they want (unless you agree to do so), but they do have the right to expect you to follow through with your commitments.
You have to wonder why car dealerships and real estate companies run your credit report. To see if you follow through as you say you will. You have to wonder why they ask for a down payment or earnest money. To see just how invested you are in the project before they give you more of the money than you have available yourself. It is a trust issue and you have to show that you will follow through. Sad to say, the fact that so many African-Americans have such bad credit shows being untrustworthy is far too prevalent in our community.
Things happen? True. But that’s not the fault of the person or business you made a commitment to. And the wrong attitude of excuses and fake justifications is a big reason that so many African-Americans end up, divorced, breaking commitments, as if there were always good reasons when there really weren’t. Irreconcilable differences, for example, is a joke.
All that says is that two people don’t want to solve the problem. That doesn’t mean the problem can’t be solved. They are just not committed to doing it, yet when they got married, they made it seem like their spouse was the best thing since sliced bread.
Things change? Yes. But firm commitment should not. African-American people are taking this far too lightly and it is reflected in the numbers of domestic violence, infidelity and divorce. All based on lack of commitment that is creating single-parent homes and confused, unbalanced children.
Do you wonder why sometimes things go wrong at the absolute worst possible moment? May be a problem with a car or a job, a child or a neighbor. A credit card or a relationship. A vacation or a bank account. A promotion or a job interview. Vacation plans or medical results. Some of you are quick call it “the Devil”, especially you avid churchgoers. But very often what is really happening is things you have done are coming back to hit you in the face.
Karma is a boomerang. That means whatever you throw out there is coming back to you. You must face what goes around comes around – you know it does. You must face that we reap what we sow – you know that is true. So maybe you should act like you know.
Keep your word. Follow through. Do what you said you were going to do unless there is no possible way to do it. And even in that case, notify the person you made the commitment to, just as you would your job. Your employer will not tolerate lack of commitment. And you should owe it to your people even more. Why? Because that helps your people get ahead, have respect for you, sets the right examples, and builds a future stronger than the one in place now.
Being an adult, mature and wise, is not being able to do whatever we want to do. It is having the good judgment to do the things we should do. Things that will take us further and higher in life instead of causing us to work against ourselves. If the African-American community ever learns that, just as almost every other ethnic group has, we will come together and end up ahead instead of behind. Instead of struggling so much. Instead of excuses.
Maybe you determine your commitments based on how important the people are or the outcome is instead of making commitment a part of your character. Or maybe you don’t even care about following through with some people. But you will when it comes back like a boomerang hit you in the face. And when Karma comes to visit, people usually realize exactly why, exactly what and exactly who. You see, when you don’t follow through, keep your word or honor your commitments, you are creating roadblocks and consequences for yourself. You are therefore working against yourself and sabotaging yourself.
So do I always keep my word? I know maybe you are wondering since I wrote this article. The answer is yes, unless there are three conditions. The only time I break my word is if I am sick, dead, or a third-party interference to the point that I cannot follow through. Other than that, I don’t have to like you in order to keep my word. I don’t have to want to do it or not, that’s irrelevant. It’s not about if you will get in trouble or not. It’s about rising to a higher level of integrity and commitment and credibility.
It’s about planning the things to what you want to come back to you. It’s about being the example to those around you. It’s about expecting more of yourself and your people. It’s about not letting others down because you would not want them to let you down. It’s about rising higher, so you can dismiss this entire article if you like, or you can make the necessary changes. It’s up to you but just remember KARMA IS A BOOMERANG, you won’t be able to duck and get out of the way and it will hit you at the most inconvenient times. Step up.
If a man or woman cannot be trusted to keep a commitment and follow through, why should anybody ever trust you with a new car or a house or working on their job? Why should anybody ever trust you with a loan or do a favor for you that you are not likely to pay back? Why should anybody ever want to marry you if you won’t do what you say? Why should any date ever wait for you if you may not even show up?
Your word has to be your bond. Whether you are getting paid or not. Whether you would get in trouble or not. It has to be a rise in integrity and character, while raising up a higher standard. Setting the bar. Making the grade. And if African-Americans continue to make excuses for thinking and living even below mediocrity, how can any one of you ever reach the excellence you have a potential to reach? Don’t short change yourself. Don’t short change your family, friends, and coworkers. Don’t short change your people. Step up!
Staff Writer; Trevo Craw
A Free Thinker, who loves to talk about Politics, etc. Also, all about uplifting the Black Community even if it doesn’t fit your mindset. One may hit me up at; TrevoCraw@ThyBlackMan.com.