(ThyBlackMan.com) Father, Husband, Educator, Entrepreneur, Blogger, Podcaster Children need to be exposed to diverse learning opportunities like libraries, museums and cultural events. These expand their vision in what their talents, skills and abilities are that will help them in life. Fathers are key to their children’s success in life and living.
The language and personal engagement between fathers and children is important, it helps build vocabulary, builds confidence, self-acceptance, and encourages observation of the world and its great potentials. Children need to feel comfortable and confident when asking their parents questions, their opinions to understand they have value and their curiosity is encouraged. Mothers are not the only ones that build a bond with children, a father’s bond is just as important and significant.
Fathers should never doubt they are important and valuable in their children’s life. Never allow the media, nor anyone to demean a father’s importance and significance in their child’s life. As a father is influential in their children’s life they are also important
in their communities. Fathers are part of the creative process for life. The provide a foundation of confidence, self-awareness, self-value and motivation to move past self-imposed limitations.
The value of a fathers voice, presence, confidence, hugs, love, encouragement and inspiration can be seen in the successes of youth, teens and young adults as they grow into man and woman – hood. Sharing “The Alphabet of Fatherhood Can Be Awesome for 2022”
A. Fact – fathers spend about 45% playing while moms only spend 15-20%. They create a unique bonding and a rich relationship that fathers and children build between each other. It is totally different than a mother’s relationship.
B. Fathers should help in getting the kids ready for the day. Creating unique routines that kids look forward to. Children need to see the great potential of the day not just the gloom the see from the media. A father has the power to bring the brightness of the day into reality with imagination and creativity.
C. Fathers should learn about their child’s mental and emotional development so they better understand when to “teach” and “reinforce” certain skills, talents, abilities of their children. Playing catch, tying shoes, brushing teeth, and other things are a process that
is taught according to the developmentally able child. Children learn differently from their mothers and fathers so don’t compare your children to others, even their siblings.
D. Fathers should have time to read to, read with and listen to their children. Fathers can make reading time special. A storytelling trip for their children that build language development and stronger imaginations.
E. Fathers should make special trips to book stories, libraries, museums and parks. Make learning unique and fun adventures. Fathers can plan field trips virtually and build tents inside and pretend camping among other things.
F. Fathers need to know their children’s interests as they mature and grow. Learning as much as possible about their children. Stop the mindset that fathers are less important and less valuable.
G. Fathers should know what foods their kids like. What makes their mouths smile and their energies expand. Fathers take their children shopping as new adventures to the stores in the community. Make sure children communicate about their likes and dislikes.
H. Fathers need to be familiar with their children’s sleep patterns. Give mom a break and help to keep sleep time, nap time consistent. Everyone needs sleep and rest.
I. Fathers need to spend time with their newborns. A father’s smell, voice, skin, hugs need to be comforting to newborns. Just as newborns bond with moms, they also bond with
fathers.
J. Fathers need to understand that the first months of a newborn’s life are key to bonding. Fathers should plan ahead to take paternity leave, use vacation time or other options to stay home and help mom and child adjust to the new world. The first words of a toddler are
often dada not mama.
K. Fathers need to learn their child’s behaviors and their developing personality. What activities make the newborn, toddler or growing child laugh, happy, sad, scared, excited, etc. Connecting with your children carries throughout life.
L. Fathers need to be a part of the educational and developmental process of their children. A father’s influence in education can be key to success and growth not just athletically, but intellectually.
M. When the child is school aged fathers need to be there every step of the way. Teachers, administrators, and other school personnel need to know that children have two parents even if they are not in the same home. Be part of a learning ministry that teaches not doctrine, but the love of Christ and the love of giving, praising and studying the scriptures.
N. Children need to see their parents working, they need to see their parents communicating and being active. Too many times parents “hide” their emotions which causes confusion in children. Children learn how to collaborate, cooperate, lead, follow and enjoy others.
O. Fathers need to monitor television watching, video game playing, cell phone and other digital access. There are so many suggestions and innuendos that will cause confusion and doubt in girls and boys about their bodies, culture, skin care, height, weight and other physical attributes. Parents are the first line of knowledge that builds self-esteem, self-confidence and self-respect.
P. A father’s words can bring life and death to their children. Fathers should be careful what they say to their children and how they say it, even how they talk about their mother and other family members. The voice has power!!
Q. Fathers should be listeners first and fixers second. Fathers are instinctively fixers of problems for their children and families. The important part is fathers should listen first to get all the information needed and involve their children in the fixing process. Fathers take the opportunity to include their children if old enough to fix any problems that are teachable moments.
R. Dads should not be scared to “play” with their children. When the opportunity comes play is beneficial, it can build confidence, trust, love, respect and solidify a relationship. Fathers get your play on and relieve stress, anxiety and mental health.
S. “Know Thy Self” dads should know their maturity, their strengths and weaknesses. Understand what drives you and moves you. “Before you start raising children look at your foundation.” Nishan Nicks (Fresh World Ministries)
T. Communication is important between parents, moms and dads need to be open and honest when talking about parental responsibilities. They both must understand that their children are living and growing human beings and will develop their own personalities. They will not stay the same forever and time does fly by when you have children. The second child or more time flies by faster.
U. Fathers take care of “your” bodies, “your” minds and “your” spirit. You are responsible for more than yourself. Visit the doctors regularly and change your eating habits and late-night activities. Your health influences the health of your family.
V. Fathers plan for the future, plan for your future educational growth, future retirement, kid’s educational future, the growth of the family. Consider what is possible 5 to 10 years in the future. Money is not the only cause for a job or career changes. Support your spouses or partners desire to improve their education and career as well.
W. Plan vacations that are active and engaging. Be sure to plan destinations are kid friendly. Plan to make sure the trip is beneficial for your kids and the family not just you.
X. Treat your spouse or partner to some personal time. Allow them to grow outside of parenthood to refresh their spirit and mind just as you need time. Don’t grow stale or complacent.
Y. Don’t forget the grandparents in visits and trips, they can be a partnership and building blocks to mental, physical, emotional health and wellness.
Z. Be a parent, not a buddy. As your child grows so will you and you must modify your parenting discipline, language, expectations. There are no “perfect” parents. You will make mistakes. Just do your best and learn as you go.
Staff Writer; William D. Jackson
Find out more about this talented writer over at; OCS For Education.
