(ThyBlackMan.com) Recently I wrote an article entitled What’s Wrong With African-American Women. But now it’s time for us to take a good hard look at African-American men and the problems we have. Beware guys, because if you keep reading, I am going to be hard on you – hard but fair. Why? Because you have to set the tone for the family and the community. You are the leaders who need to rise up and stop blaming the white man, even though I acknowledge there has been a systematic and strategic effort in this country to emasculate and oppress you . But you are bigger than that and better than that. If you will look in the mirror and fix your problems, you can expect that the world will take note and you will command restoration to your rightful place, a place stolen from you by slavery.
Too many men of our ethnicity are branded as lazy, sorry, no good, irresponsible, game players, users, immature or dogs. And many of you look and walk like a duck so….. but you can change that. Some of you are not in those categories, but for those of you who are, it’s time to grow up, man up and step up. No more excuses. No more blaming the “baby’s mama” YOU picked. You got what you wanted but then you didn’t want what you got. Life deals some nasty blows but you can and need to dust yourself off and stop waiting on your woman to do it for you. I do not want to call you names because the world does too much of that already. Instead I want to look at your problems, what caused them and what is keeping them in place. Largely, the only one who can really hold you down is you – unless you empower someone else to do so by believing they can.
Many African-American men are wounded, broken or both. These are reasons for certain behaviors, not excuses. The culprits? Slavery, abusive or “too busy” moms, absentee dads, negative females from past relationships and even childhood molestations. You may not be aware of this but in the worldwide sex trade (especially in the Illuminati), young boys are considered prizes, trophies and prime candidates for sexual abuse – in some cases more so than young girls. I know of dozens of cases I have encountered in my present or previous career. But men you need to know that you are a victim only as long as you believe you are. The minute you stop accepting that is the minute the authority over your reality begins to return to you.
A great many African-American men lack a knowledge of self and identity. Who are you? What are you? If you say you are a “black man”, you have already missed the boat. Black is the color of your car tires and in this country our people were labeled as “black” by white slave owners to create a contrast between night and day, good and evil, dismal and bright. You need to know who and what you are and many of you do not have a clue. If you do not know who or what you are, you will likely act like something and somebody you are not. You were made in God’s image so it’s time you wake up and act like you know. When you realize just the things I have said so far and you receive the revelation of them, the leader in you will begin to wake up, the lion in you will begin to rise up and the victory in you will start to show up.
A lack of real identity is what allows false identities and poor standards to take root. Too many of our brothers are acting like dogs in heat, chasing everything with a skirt, stretch pants or a “coochie“. You need to stop thinking below the waist. Instead you should be concentrating on your goals, your identity and your example. If you do so, women will notice you and you will not have to chase them. But you cannot expect a woman to follow your lead if all you do is lead yourself off a cliff or into a brick wall.
I must take a minute to set myself, my research and my motives apart from the Steve Harveys of the world who basically sell out men in order to get a TV show and a game show. Then there are the mediocre Dr Phils of the world who convince people all of their problems start in the mirror. That is not always true, but looking in the mirror can help you take account of your ability to do something about who or what is hindering you. Be very careful of the types I just mentioned because these type men are opportunists waiting to exploit someone’s weakness for popularity, ratings or gain. And if you know either of the men I named, tell them I said so. I will debate them on the topic any time.
A lack of real identity causes African-American men to be lazy, poor leaders and often produce what they saw – nothing. I didn’t see that in my household growing up. But if a man acts like a dog, he does so because he subconsciously believes he is a dog. If a man acts irresponsible, he believes that is who he is. If a man spends his money on strippers, prostitutes, weed or other drugs, his actions show he does not have proper insight for the future. He seeks instant gratification and the escapes of denial today instead of planning for tomorrow. He does not understand his purpose and the role he plays in the destiny of tomorrow. Before some of you get mad and say it, no It’s not just entertainment. It’s beneath you and you don’t even know it. You need to clear your head guys and regain the strength of your morality. How would you like it if your daughter or your mother was the one on stage naked that all the men are salivating over, fondling and degrading? African-American man need to represent the stability and example of men of character, value and morals – men who knows their real identity, not the identity society has embedded within you. Wake up.
Last year in 25 degree weather I saw a young African-African woman unloading a cart full of groceries while her African-American boyfriend sat in the warm car with the music on. That should never, ever happen. Before I saw him, I approached her to help. He jumped out of the car and almost got violent. He was offended and thought I was trying to talk to her, but I was only trying to help. She didn’t even bother to say thanks anyway, he got back in the warm car and she kept on loading all the groceries alone. THAT SHOULD NEVER HAPPEN. And young males, please PULL UP YOUR PANTS. Spell “saggin” backwards and what do you get? Niggas, ignorant acting African-American males who do not know who they are, what they should do or how they should act. As for the homosexual African-American males, you were born a MALE so act like a MALE. Regardless of what you think you should have been, apparently “God” did not have to get your consent before He created you so act like you know.
Guys you are getting tagged, targeted and stereotyped because you have allowed yourself to fall right into the behavioral traps that were set for you. Put simply, you are acting just like they said you would, thinking just as they predicted and reacting just as they expected. This has to stop. You are better than that, you are bigger than that and you were not born for that.
Guys you need to stop degrading women – even when they degrade themselves. You need to stop belittling women, abusing women and bouncing from woman to woman. You need to stop cheating. You need to take care of your children and teach your young boys to grow up and do the same. Do not let the woman or the court run you away because neither is an excuse for your absence. You need to pay your bills, learn the English language, stop using ebonic garbage or foul language and stop waiting for women to do what you should be doing.
I do realize the system we live in has been set up to trap you, oppress you and crush you, but only you can step into the trap. Nobody can force you into the bear trap unless you let them. It’s time to be accountable for your own actions. Today you need to stop blaming mama, daddy, the white man, the government, George Bush, the woman YOU picked or your job. If you have been hurt, welcome to the club, but it’s time to heal and stand up. You are going to have to face your problems and make them go away, not smoke them away, drink them away, weed them away or blame them away on someone else.
African-American women, while you are nodding your head, choose to be part of that man’s solution – not just part of his problem. We know the problems but lift him up, motivate him, encourage him and expect him to meet a higher standard. Then give him time to do it. Ladies when it comes to African-American men, if you cannot speak up to build up and lift up then shut up. Change often takes time, but with help my African-American brothers, it can and will happen – no matter what you have gone through. The mirror must become a friend to the African-American man, not an enemy. Only then can the African-American man cast a true reflection of the greatness he has within. I believe in you!
To reach me for confidential counseling, mediation, problem resolution, life coaching or other articles I have written, email me at brainstormonline@yahoo.com. You always have options.
Staff Writer; Marque-Anthony
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The Greek philosopher Plato said that a democracy degenerates into a dictatorship. Putin's Russia recently, historically speaking, lost a communist dictatorship, and gained capitalism, and a more open society. Trump is experimenting with changing a liberal pluralistic democracy with its capitalist economic base that fosters an open society into a less liberal political entity. Trump came to power by the will of the voters who claim to be tired of America's liberal tendencies footing the bills for the poor, infirmed, aged, and social programs in general. Putin came to power in response to his nation’s disenchantment with being able to achieve the ideals of the Communist Manifesto as conceived by Karl Marx, and Friedrick Engels. Putin is learning how to lead an open society, and Trump's negative actions relative to the news media, and the other two branches of government tends to indicate that he is opposed to many of the long established principles of an open society. Trump tries to severely lessen the amount of information that he, and his administration releases to the public. He attacks some of the mass news media companies, and claim that they are dispensing " fake news ." The political actions of both Putin, and Trump are testing the elasticity of their political structures. Putin is asking if a closed society can open? Trump is asking if an open society can close?
The people of Montgomery County, PA ought to insist that the District Attorney stop wasting their tax dollars trying to convict an innocent man ! A mis-trial in and of itself isn't grounds for a retrial. Montgomery County, Pennsylvania shouldn't pay one single tax dollar in support of the prosecutor's bruised ego, or for him to make good on a campaign promise that he shouldn't have made in the first place. The people have spoken, and the prosecutor should move on. If ethics is a main concern, consider this; the white man, Ole " grab em by tha p " himself, sits in the White House as president of the United States of America no less as a shining example of contemporary American white man ethics. We know this because he was voted into office by a majority white electoral college while a few months later the politicians in Montgomery County waste citizen's hard earned tax dollars trying to convict an innocent black comedian, and actor. The villainization of the African American male hasn't ceased in America from the time of chattel slavery until now. To many, Cosby is guilty by American political default. Default. He is guilty because his ancestors escaped chattel slavery, sued for their freedom, was freed by Abraham Lincoln, mightily fought Jim Crow, got Civil Rights,didn't have to sit in the back of the bus, walking around in three piece suits and it isn't Sunday,wouldn't get off of the sidewalk when I wanted him to do it,eats in the restaurant with me, goes to the movies with me, sits in the university classroom with me,want to earn money like me, didn't punk out when we hung John Brown, and Nat Turner, didn't punk out when we made prisons part of their male and female rights of passage, didn't punk out when one of us shot King, Didn't punk out when we hung cases on nearly all of their heroes,and now he WANTS MY WOMAN ! Cosby is innocent, and he shouldn't be villainized, and robbed of his money.
National Museum of African American History and Culture
A few days ago I journeyed to Washington D.C. to tour our National Museum of African American History and Culture. This Smithsonian museum’s beautiful building is located on Constitution Avenue N.W., and was booming with visitors from seemingly all nations and all walks of life. There are security services and tour guides stationed throughout the building that are more than willing to assist visitors as they move through the ramped, multi-leveled, spacious, circular, wheelchair accessible edifice, and souvenirs can be purchased from a delightful museum store to help mark this historic visit. This very interesting tour of the museum begins when you enter and walk into the Concourse room which features " Sweet Home Cafe ", and a Theater. Proceed on to the entrance to the " Contemplative Court " and " History Galleries " (C1-C3). C3 is titled “Slavery and Freedom 1400-1877 “.
This gallery features statues, written comments, and information on how African slaves were dispersed throughout Europe and the world, actual artifacts,to include slave handcuffs and shackles and audio/visual displays dating from chattel slavery’s beginning through the Civil War. History Gallery C2 is titled " Defending Freedom, Defining Freedom: The Era of Segregation 1876 - 1968. This exhibit features numerous sights and discussions of the " Jim Crow Era " to include an actual railroad car, and a portion of a Florida prison tower that was in use during segregation, an interactive Lunch Counter which shows excerpts of Civil Rights clashes with police and American citizens, the Emmett Till Memorial, a Tuskegee Airplane, and other audio/visual displays relative to this time period. C1 is titled " A changing America: 1968 And Beyond "and features exhibitions relative to the events of 1968 to include Audio/visual displays of some of the marches of the Civil Rights Movement. Level one ( i.e. L1 ) is titled " Heritage Hall ", and features an information counter and a museum store. L2 features classrooms,a library, an interactive gallery, center for African American Media Arts and an Explore Your Family History Center. L3 is titled " Community Galleries " and features audio/visuals on sports, Making a Way out of No Way ", and " The African American Military Experience. " L4 features audio/visuals on " Visual Arts and the American Experience ", " Musical Crossroads ", " Cultural Expressions ", and " Taking the Stage ."
With all displays considered the National Museum of African American History and Culture provides a day's outing that is both informative and entertaining so teachers, civic organizations, tour guides, and others interested in American history and are seeking a truly memorable tour, put on some comfortable attire and make your way to our nation's capital to experience the thought provoking, and eye opening National Museum of African American History and Culture.
Pelvo White, Jr.
Contemporary African American Skepticism
The contemporary African American skeptic concerns himself with both worldly and other-worldly thoughts. Worldly thought concerns itself with the career of the human body. Other worldly thought concerns itself with the career of the immortal soul. Such thoughts contend that god is the ruler of the world, theological thought puts forth that the body is weak and destructible, and the soul is immortal. We do not get to this understanding of self through a strict set of reasoning, but by being told through theological discussions. We know the world outside of ourselves through our five senses. There is nothing in mind that was not first in senses.Religion requires that we perform the "leap of faith" to arrive at some understanding of the will of god. Faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things unseen." This paradoxical mingling of logic and illogic gives us a way of understanding and accepting supposedly what goes on outside of self that is detectable by our senses.
Faith in a god who promises his rewards in heaven is other-worldly and empirical science is slowly pushing this kind of thought further and further out into infinity as our powerful tools used to investigate objectified nature reveal more and more of that which was outside of normal sense observations. We are finding that nothing is fixed, nothing is truly determined, and everything is relative. The African American skeptic is asked to accept the premise that he is born into a determined world where he must suffer. The skeptic must doubt and push back against the basic premise of a determined world and his present place in it. Skeptic thought, meaning the connecting of ideas that challenge the contemporary, takes us to another place . Skepticism calls us to practice a critical philosophy on what we think, how we act, and how we are treated. Skepticism takes us to the realization that racism is an illogical act and poverty an illogical condition. We must be skeptics when it comes to all modes of thought that condemns us to perpetual suffering and racism, doubt its authenticity, and its reality. Condemn it as flawed thought, and move on into a better future.
Pelvo White, Jr.
It is a failure to leave adolescence. What are the characteristic features of adolescence? Impulsivity, self-centeredness, irresponsibility, listening to fools (impressionable), complaing and resentful. It's not unique to African Americans- all teenagers are guilty of becoming these things. And how the problem can be fixed: there's only one solution. Black men and women need to show the next generation the high road in life. Considering the needs of your family and community. Begin the process and in a few generations you will all be on your way. Let go of the negative parts of your culture, they are bringing you down. White people had to do the same thing: we had to let go of our superiority complex, our racism. There may still be prejudicial behavior but you dont see the common white man or woman lynching black Americans or kicking them out of their businesses. I don't blame Black men and women, but you all are the only ones who have the power to change yourselves. Turn to your good roots: Christianity, brotherhood and fellowship. Harden and cement your identity by reaching to the past, to Africa perhaps or at least learning the history of your own people and its great acheivements (with a positive mindset)! Focus on the resentments of the past and you will only recreate them as a self-fulfilling prophecy! No one wants to see you fail.
I had this exchange on a dating website. This is very typical of the responses I get. SOMEONE told all black men that all black women want them...... regardless of if they really do. All he has to be is a black interested male and he is in... When that doesnt happen the his tinny world crashes in on him. The bitter black male is a pain.
JonReality12/7/2016 10:42:50 PM
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Beautiful how are you doing this wonderful day ???. I love your profile and would love to know you better. Hello my name is Jonathan.?
DarkjujuEmpath12/8/2016 3:59:56 AM
Good luck with your search. I am sure you will find someone. Good bye
JonReality12/8/2016 7:04:19 AM
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I don't know why the so cold reaction , I mean I was nice and respectful an I at least live in your area of the country... wheww blk women whether old are middle age are so full of anger an disrespect. I have now made my decision to give Caucasian women my attention. I just can't do this anymore with my own race. Yes good bye. An there's no need to respond with the typical blk woman words of rage, you said enough in your first cold message. Be blessed.
DarkjujuEmpath12/8/2016 7:07:52 AM
Could it be I am not physically attracted to you?? Is that so hard to believe? I dont care how much you like me I will never think of you in a romantic way. IS THAT REALLY SO HARD FOR YOU TO BELIEVE?
I am from Pakistan and still noting the impact of British colonial rule in our country.............Although i was born after British departure but I still remember British with bad name.............the very badly persecuted the local people and their legacy is that the ruling elite of Pakistan is still running the affairs of Pakistan with British mindset.............these BROWN BASTARDS created a havoc for the local people............the bureaucracy, the army, the industrialist, the trader........they all are working with their British masters mindset.........this is one of the biggest cause of backwardness......
the problem of American-Africans is that once they were slaves............the white rascals have kidnapped them from Africa and sold them as slaves in America..........they reunite them after marriages but the way they were uprooted from their ancestral lands is very painful and disgusting..........the main problem/hindrance of black people is their slavery...........I have not seen a single western country but what I read and seen through video based documentaries is that the WHITE RASCALS de-shaped this globe for their hegemonic designs particularly Britain, France, Holland, Belgium, Spain and now USA. I am of the opinion that the US black people are still in a state of fear of SLAVERY..........if the American government is sincere with them, have to do something special for them..............
Three words. " Low Self esteem". Why do so many young black men in this country worship the tangibles? You know, The running shoes, jewelry and cars that bounce? and have almost no regard for the intangibles such as education, self discipline and self pride? The tangibles gets them instant
attention and they instantly feel better about themselves.So they will do anything for the feeling including beg borrow or stealing and sometimes killing for the tangibles.
In contrast, look at African immigrants who come to this country. With a healthy self esteem, the tangibles are not important. How many African drug dealers do you know? Most African immigrants that I know either have a post high school degree or are in the process of getting one. They are not distracted by the tangibles. They don't need to be. The low self esteem or inferiority complex has to be dealt with.
Well stated Marque-Anthony!
Date: Sat 05-Mar-2011
Full Text:
TITLE:African-Americans fuse Eastern, Western influences
SECTION:Viewpoints
PUBDATE:March 5, 2011
HEADLINE:African-Americans fuse Eastern, Western influences
BYLINE:By PELVO WHITE JR.
TEXT:MARIANNA, FLORIDA
The greatest challenges facing African-Americans today are centered on the
problems of being (existence) and axiology (knowledge of values).
African-Americans must completely shed their old inherited chattel slavish
cocoon of being in order to fully embrace and value their existences as
American citizens. America must support and build upon ways to deliver the
African-American as a whole being, not a broken one, into mental and physical
freedom as autonomous beings hundreds of years after the nihilistic
psychological and physical damages of chattel slavery.
African-Americans must put on a new being by fully accepting what we have
become, which is nothing less than a fusion of Eastern world ancestry and
Western world existence. America should be proud of the fact that
African-Americans are living beings who are proving through their very
existences that it is possible to fuse Eastern and Western thought into a
viable, useful citizen.
African-Americans are the living, breathing prototypes of human evolutional
change possibilities in contemporary America. Men like G.W. Carver, W.E.B.
Dubois and M.L. King Jr. all helped point the way toward true white American
and African-American reconciliation, and the African-American’s liberating
sense of self, and subsequent real freedom.
African-American epistemology (the study of knowledge ) and aesthetics
(expressions of beauty) are firmly rooted in Western thought, a way of
thinking that once enslaved our ancestors and has now set us free, but this
has been a partial freedom thus far which has freed the body much more than
the mind. Many African-Americans still haven’t developed a clear definition of
their being that is consistent with existing as a good citizen, as evidenced
by too many of us being either incarcerated or not living up to our fullest
potentials in America.
Partial confusion still exists because many African Americans have inherited
and still carry confusion as a result of our ancestors being psychologically
and physically unmade as beings, and remade through selective breeding and
harsh punishments by ancestral slaveholders. Most African-American ancestors
were psychologically and physically broken down and then remade in an image
created by their captors who, in fact, forced Western thought upon Eastern
enslaved Africans.
Some African-Americans still struggle against Western thought, choosing to try
to replace it with other non-Eurocentric systems of logic. Much of the results
of this process over time are African-Americans who do not necessarily
identify with Africa at all, and are cut adrift psychologically when it comes
to a sense of self. They are isolated from America’s mainstream.
Too many African-Americans remain mystified by the whole of Western thought,
which is the root of contemporary American thought. Many cannot decipher the
signs and symbols of a Eurocentric or Afrocentric logical world. There is a
disconnect of thought that creates an uncertainty in the being. Education of
self is the key to a good recovery from the harmful effects of ancestral
chattel slavery. A knowledge of and acceptance of self is a liberating
journey.
Empirical research and study into the origins of African-American being and
knowledge will lead the citizen triumphantly out of the destructive past to
the discovery of a contemporary suitable American being, a more universal
being, who is fully capable of masterfully addressing the American future.