Saturday, September 30, 2023

“The Untouchables”; Starring Black Women.

March 31, 2014 by  
Filed under News, Opinion, Relationships, Sista Talk, Weekly Columns

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( One of the definitions of untouchable is: beyond criticism, control, or suspicion.

As Black Women we have a tendency to think that we are beyond criticism, and when we are justifiably criticized we scream that we are being attacked, but have no problem verbally attacking Black Men, and because the Black Woman is so rebellious and out of control, it makes it difficult and almost impossible to control her(us). Black Men have a right to be suspicious of us at times. How many of us use our wombs for manipulation? How many of us have mastered how to manipulate men by graduating Magna cum laude, from the courses taught to us by our Mothers?

Two fallacies that we are guilty of as women that contribute to the “untouchable mentality” are:

“Special Pleading” and “The Sacred Cow”

Special pleading is a form of spurious argumentation where a position in a dispute introduces favorable details or excludes unfavorable details by alleging a need to apply additional considerations without proper criticism of these considerations themselves. Essentially, this involves someone attempting to cite something as an exemption to a generally accepted rule, principle, etc. without justifying the exemption.

In other words, everything we say is applicable to Black Men, and we have just cause,  but they don’t and nothing they say is applicable and valid in regards to us.

Not only are we guilty of this fallacy we also normally combine it with our favorite conjunction; “but” or inclusive language such as “we and both”.theuntouchables

Here are a couple of commonly used examples when the Black Woman is in the hot seat:

As Black Women we will say how we have been effected by slavery and it will be justified. A Black Man says it, and it is an excuse.

As Black Women we will be VERY vocal about our pain, and again it’s justified. When Black Men do so, they are whining or are  punks.

When it is pointed out that the Black Woman needs to get herself together, it quickly becomes WE need to work together.

Even if there is a SLIGHT acknowledgement it is quickly overshadowed by the use of a conjunction.

Yes Black Women should be accountable BUT so should Black Men.

While the above is true, it is normally being said as a deflection tactic.

This is the definition of the “Sacred Cow”:

A person, institution, custom, etc, unreasonably held to be beyond criticism.

This is what the Black Woman “thinks” she has become. We think we are above critique but certainly don’t mind critiquing others, ESPECIALLY Black Men.

Black Woman contrary to what you’ve been told, taught or led to believe you are NOT untouchable. You are NOT above reproach. You are NOT above being checked. You are NOT above being corrected. You are NOT without faults and flaws. You are NOT always the victim. In our circumstances we must learn to accept accountability, responsibility and culpability.

It’s not ALWAYS him. Sometimes its YOU(us). Sometimes it’s OUR mouths, our attitudes, our air of superiority, our self righteous, our rebelliousness, our dysfunctional behavior, our unwillingness to look at ourselves. We have been placed on a make shift pedestal so we have a tendency to look down at Black Men and want them to look “up” to us in a superior manner.  We sit on this “throne” as if we are REAL Queens and expect Black Men to be our subjects, our jesters, our entertainment and our peasants. We are so quick to sentence them to a lifetime of accountability, but will squirm, bat eyelashes, flash a pretty smile(among other things)to escape accountability.

One of the downfalls of those with an arrogant mindset is that they can’t be touched, or checked. If you can’t be humble enough to be checked, then don’t get upset when no one is checking FOR you.

Staff Writer; Nojma Muhammad
To learn more about this talented sister, feel free to visit; Nojma Reflects.


6 Responses to ““The Untouchables”; Starring Black Women.”
  1. jblack1 says:

    Wow! Very Powerful article sister! Extremely analytical & insightful. I think it is therapeutic (sp?) when both our men and women put our flaws and shortcomings on the table for self examnination and critique. You hit the nail on head in all aspects…
    unfortunately I saw a couple of Ladies in my immediate family that came to my mind as I was reading your article. One of the most powerful statement in your piece (and it applies to Men as well as women equally) was…. “contrary to what you’ve been told, taught or led to believe you are NOT untouchable. You are NOT above reproach. You are NOT above being checked. You are NOT above being corrected. You are NOT without faults and flaws.” Again excellent and very well written article.God Bless U sister!..Keep up the good work!..Oh and please feel free to read an article I recently submitted

  2. Fyah Blaze says:

    De truth is an offense, but not a sin!!!! Don’t mek de Fyah cool Nojma, keep it red hott!!! Fyah is de purification of all tings (from de physical, to de spiritual on to de mental) …..One Perfect Black Love

  3. Chief says:

    I agree totally. my problem with black women is that they don’t hold their black man down.its always some form of manipulation because there women> Now I come from a family full of women and have seen the effects of black women treating their male counterparts as some type of fixture such as a lamp, table and or chair. other cultures understand the responsibility there men have but don’t wish to emasculate them in order for them to fill empowered.

  4. truth speaker says:

    This is perhaps the worst pos I’ve read in quite some time. This site has nothing but patriarchal women willing to shuck n jive for a paycheck and male approval. It’s really sad, but then again, one can’t expect much from someone with your last name. Your culture has been so indoctrinated with anti-woman sentiment until you’re no different than a minority with a colonized mind.

    And for the record: I’m not going to advocated men being on a pedestal while they look down on women. Out of ALL the problems going on that need addressing in the black community, it’s amazing how our male “leaders” and their female flunkies, they find time to talk about their supposed emasculation by black women and NOT the real cause of white supremacist, patriarchal structures that has and continues to do a better job at it than black women.

  5. shannon says:

    I totally agree with that. There has also been several platforms where men are always speaking to women. The only platform I see where women speak to women is Oprah. Every other way to communicate to a woman is by a man. So maybe if the voices of men were drowned out in the other avenues we would be more open to discuss these issues. Until men take a step back and begin having a conversation without telling women what to do for their benefit I feel you will have more women open to these issues.

  6. Sheila says:

    Hi Nojma,
    I really tried to digest this article before I commented. Surely, some of your points are valid and most certainly I do not think you are suggesting your points are valid for all Black Women. Honestly, I don’t personally know any Black women who believe they are beyond criticism or “Untouchable” and I really don’t believe accepting or not accepting criticism should be relegated to just Black women. The most significant issue is we seldom get constructive criticism. Often we hear about what we do not do and rarely do we get honored for the things we do right in our relationships. Should we check ourselves? Certainly, we all need a reality check at least every once and a while. If we communicated in a manner that opens up for construction critiques and dialogs on both sides, we would have more successful relationships. As Black women we have been affected by a lot of things, low wages, negative images, lack of fathers in our homes, rape and yes, slavery. While these are not excuses for some behaviors, it is a reason we need to uplift and offer support for women who have a low self-esteem and other social issues that would make them defensive when criticized.

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