(ThyBlackMan.com) Communication seems very simple right! One person is talking, and the other person is listening, but… if either person does not communicate effectively, a serious problem can arise. Communication is important in every relationship, and there are many times when relationships are tainted or ends due to the communication breakdown.
First of all we have to learn that we have to tell people how we feel, if we don’t we will just act on our emotions and possible hurt the other party involved. Now when you get ready to talk to your mate or whomever, you need to watch
how you say things and the tone that you use because other people might take something the wrong way, which will create an argument or confusion. When you need to get something off of your chest, do not talk down to someone or come at them in attack mode. All this will do is make that person defensive and snap back at you without even thinking about your problem.
There is also responsibility on the listener to not get so upset about what they are hearing. The fact that the person is talking to you should let you know that they might not mean any harm. Even if they are yelling, you should try to understand why they are upset and do not play into that. Most of the times the two people end up yelling and saying a bunch of bull that does not even have anything to do with the convo. Now you are just going to hurt each others feelings with ugly words.
I think that this is what is wrong with a lot of our Black Marriages and why divorce comes up so much. Either we do not communicate with our mates correctly, or we don’t do it at all. We have to learn how to talk to people, and listen at the same time. If you are anything like me, sometimes you think that you are so right that you can’t even listen to the other person. Even if you are right, the other person might not process things the way you do, so you should be patient and listen to them.
The key is respect, and if you have that for one another, the communication should be cool. This is something that I have learned through marriage, and its very important. You might think you know, but do you REALLY know how to communicate with people, especially your mate?
Staff Writer; Kataurus Braswell
This brother is founder of Black Convo Media Group LLC, a group of website’s dedicated to African Americans. He is also a freelance writer, music producer, and blogger.
Can also connect via Facebook BCMedia and Twitter; BlackConvo.