The ‘Real Black Man’ Dilemma.

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(ThyBlackMan.com) I’ve been made aware, thanks to the ‘Mainstream Mess’ (or, the ‘Lamestream Press’ as stated by the POTUS), that there is a new generation of young people who have captured their attention. “Generation Z” is their name. They are also called “Generation Disney” as their first were born around 1995 (according to various Internet sources and “Forbes Magazine”). From what I have learned (thus far) Generation Z/Disney are more conservative, more self-reliant, less in need of pats on the back, more gifted with technology, and (hopefully) hard-working.

Once upon a time, my successful, syndicated column “The Manhood Line ™”, made its way around many a college campus. With more and more of the new generation growing up, I believe it’s time to reach back into the ‘Gold File’ and bring back a few of my favorites, so that they may be shared with a new generation of young Black Men.

Just to let you know up front…when I can, I always spell ‘black’ with a capital ‘B’. That’s just the radical coming out in me, from my college protest days. IF Negro was spelled with a capital ‘N’, then logic follow logic when trying to define a race of people. I know that some of my English teachers may cringe; others, though, would be proud of my making a statement. Words mean things. If others can invent them, others can change them.

THE RAMEY WAYBLACK MACHINE:

Let me warn you up front, brothers. There are some who are NOT going to like this column, for a variety of reasons:

*It doesn’t fit into their ‘agenda’ of keeping Black men down, or under control.

*It doesn’t fit into the ‘I can’t find a good man’ chorus.

*It doesn’t fit into the ‘shame, blame, and maintain’
focus groups.

*It doesn’t qualify for federal funding, or a private think tank.

*It doesn’t fit the ‘image’ of Black men seen in social media.

*It won’t justify the Jezebel rantings of the #MeToo crowd.

But, let me open with the following salvo to give you a ‘road marker’ as to where this column IS going: “A Woman CAN NOT define a Man!”

Let me repeat myself for those who may have tuned in late: “A Woman CAN NOT define a Man!” That is not her job, nor her function, nor within her realm of influence, or her mental capacity. And, if a Woman CAN NOT define a Man, she CAN NOT define MANHOOD! Oooh, I KNOW I’m going to get some mail on THAT point!

But it’s the truth, the plain truth, and (if you have been reading my columns for any amount of time), the UGLY truth! There are facts, and there are UGLY facts!

Let me continue my thought here. A single woman CAN NOT define a single man. Even a married woman CAN NOT define her husband. In the marriage relationship, the wife is to complete her husband–not compete with him; and the husband is to cover his wife. In the single scheme of things, try as you might ladies, you CAN NOT force him to marry you! HE has to FIND you, win your friendship, date you, court you, THEN ask for your hand–preferably with your father in the conversation.

STOP listening to your friends, sisters. IF you have what HE needs for a lifetime, he WILL ask! Be HIS friend, and you COULD be his wife!

But, I digress!

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

Now, based upon the offerings of the feminized mainstream press, the entertainment ‘talking heads’, and some women’s groups, one may THINK that THEY have ‘cornered the market’ on what constitutes a ‘real’ man, based upon the hours spent ‘discussing’ men, ‘examining’ men, or ‘shacking with’ men.

Sorry, they don’t even come CLOSE!

And, if you surf the web, or read any of the offerings of the African American media community, UNLESS a man has a ‘certain’ build, has a ‘certain’ income, or drive a ‘certain’ type of car, the brother doesn’t qualify for notice, let alone existence.

Nothing could be further from the truth.

Don’t shout me down when the keys are on a roll!

I find it highly interesting that the “#MeToo” crowd are against men ‘sizing up’ women, but it’s OK for a woman to ‘size up’ a man’s build, bank account or other features?
That’s Jezebelian logic at its lowest.

REMEMBERING A DAY GONE BY:

Years ago, during the Civil Rights struggle (which WE won by the way), there was a particular sign brothers used to carry on the picket lines: “I AM a MAN”. THAT statement seemed obvious when carried by a group of brothers, but I am amazed that so many MISSED its meaning and focus.

Brothers, we ARE in a New Millennium–no doubt about it. Must WE go back to carrying that sign to define WHO we are, and ‘justify’ that we are ‘real Black men’?

I don’t think so!

As I stated in an earlier column; “IF everyone else has had failures and shortcomings and ‘have’ to be regarded as being ‘alright’, then why do the attempts continue to ‘classify’ and ‘hammerlock’ Black men into ‘third citizenship’ status?”

Could it be FEAR?

Could it be ENVY?

Could it be a sly attempt at CONTROL?

Let’s be honest, brothers. The VERY moment YOU let someone else DEFINE who you ARE, YOU are giving away YOUR right to be better than the sum of your individuality! In other words, WHEN someone is allowed to set limits on you because of your PAST FAILURES, they ROB you of a FUTURE of SUCCESS!

THE HISTORY OF BLACK MEN IS A RICH ONE:

From history, this lesson is clear. Few, if any, care about the failures of Dr. George Washington Carver, Booker T. Washington, or Elijah McCoy. What we see are the END RESULTS! Carver was a scientific genius, Washington founded a University on nothing more than faith, and McCoy revolutionized the rail industry.

THEY had NOTHING in their pockets when they achieved.

NOW WE have opportunity, motive, wealth, and a modern landscape on which to paint our efforts. YOU hold the brush! YOU determine the quality of the work–EVEN if it is a work in progress.

And, let me add this point. God gave each one of us a brain, talent, breath, skill, and ability. One can’t ignore the Christian connection in our success. The cradle of civilization is Africa, by God’s design. Our forefathers had a DEEP, and unapologetic link to Jesus Christ BY FAITH. If the KJV B-I-B-L-E was good enough for them, then the Bible is good enough for us today–provided we take the time to Read it, Live it, Obey it and LOVE it!

OTHER FORCES TRYING TO DEFINE REAL BLACK MEN:

There are those of other religions and cultures trying to sway us with their rhetoric of what constitutes a real Black man. Muslims, Diversity freaks, Afro centrists, Multiculturalists, Buddhists, and a host of others like to proclaim: “Well, you are NOT a real Black man, if you don’t believe the way WE do…”

Sorry, that WON’T wash with ME! Anymore than Hollywood trying to make me into a ‘thug’, Washington trying to make me into a ‘Welfare case’, Madison Avenue trying to make me into a ‘Rapper’, and ‘shade tree’ merchants trying to turn me into a ‘steady customer’! Sure, we rub elbows with the aforementioned groups on a daily basis.
However, they DON’T define who we ARE. They don’t pay my bills, they don’t work my job, and they sure don’t care for my family and my other assorted obligations.

Now, I don’t claim perfection. No one can. But, I continue to make the day-to-day journey in Christian growth and wisdom. I’ve had my share of failures, and I have my share of warts. Not every Black man will ‘grab’ the brass ring and get an NBA or NFL contract, head up a Major corporation, or negotiate ‘killer’ deals for their clients. However, there are everyday standards which we think are ‘small things’ that go a long way in determining if you are a real Black Man.

SOME OF THE STANDARDS:

Here is a short list of those standards, man to man.

Now, we ‘joke’ from time to time that BMW TRULY means BLACK MAN WORKING. Well, we NEED to check ourselves on some other standards to continue the quest towards being all that we can be as RBMs, Real Black Men:

*Are you 18 or over?

*Are you ‘law abiding’?

*Are you working to reach your fullest potential?

*If you are married, are you treating your wife and family right?

*Do you have a real relationship with God…on His terms?

*Have you looked after your education?

*Are you a good employee, or good employer?

*Are you ‘hooked’ on education, career preparation, or crime?

*Are you an encourager, or discourager of those around you?

*Are you helping others, or holding them back?

*Are you bettering the conditions of your OWN people?

*Are you charting your OWN destiny?

*Are you avoiding things–and people–who will wreck your destiny?

*Have you made attempts to right wrongs you may have caused?

*If you are not married, are you preparing for it?

*Are you keeping your family name honorable?

*Do you honor your parents?

*Do you listen to your elders?

*Are you a proactive, or reactive influence in your community?

*Do you have problems, or do your problems have you?

Brothers, you can add your own summations, and form to extend this checklist!

As I wrap up this column, let me just say that its no great secret that the brotherhood has been probed, prodded, studied and dissected as much as we have been over the years. Yes, many have been talking at us–including many of our women. Remember this: talking is the opiate of the intimidating.

Nevertheless, for those who ‘just don’t get it’ about the brotherhood and why we are the way we are, here is a simple suggestion: Check YOURSELF, because you are wrecking YOURSELF. We know WHO we are, and are doing OUR best to continue our winning streak! If you CAN’T see what WE have accomplished, it is NOT our fault if you haven’t been LOOKING!

Staff Writer; Mike Ramey

This brother is also a Minister, Modern Street Gangs Specialist, Nationally-Known Political Consultant and Syndicated Columnist who lives in Indianapolis, Indiana. “Ramey‘s Guide To Elective Office For Men”, is one of a variety of columns that Ramey has in cyberspace. His address is still the same: manhoodline@yahoo.com.