Thursday, November 30, 2023

Black Women, You Can Put Your Clothes Back On.

March 21, 2023 by  
Filed under BM, Ent., Music, News, Opinion, Weekly Columns

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( I know that I am entering a space that few men have gone before, but I’m going to do it anyway: I will opine on the nature of women’s fashion (or lack thereof). It is Women’s History Month, which is a time for all of us, particularly Black men, to think about those wonderful ladies who have influenced our lives and our communities. But there is something that has been biting at me for a while and it is time that I finally say something. I namely speak to the trend of oversexualization that seems be pervading the attire of Black women.

I say this as a dad of two young Black women who, like many young women, are influenced by celebrities like Cardi B and Megan thee Stallion. I am aware of the ‘Sex Positive’ movement espoused by these celebrities. For much of the past two decades, sex positivity — the idea that feminism should privilege sexual pleasure and fight sexual repression — has dominated the trends of fashion and public appearance for young girls. The movement pushes young women to bare more skin, wear tighter clothes, and ultimately embrace sex and sexuality.

Meg The Stallion - 2023.

But let’s be real: Black women have often been oversexualized, not victims of puritanical sexual repression. While white women were paraded in the Victorian era to be pure, powdered, and well clothed, our Black female ancestors were the victims of sexual violence and branded as hypersexual Jezebels. Until the Civil War, many American Black women were the domain of slave owners who viewed their bodies as mere property.

It thus astounds me to see that in an era where Black women have achieved so much—billionaires, CEOs, Ivy League professors, athletes—we are seeing our young women slip back to a day where their value is based on their bodies and the sexual exploitation of these bodies. This movement coincides with the rise of pornography, which has no doubt subordinated women and obscured power differentials that women have with men in sexual encounters.

The decadent regression seems to mirror the ‘Reclaiming’ movement of anti-LGBT slurs. Whereas the term ‘queer’ was once used to dismiss and subvert LGBT individuals, it is now cited as an identity that is tied to pride. The same could be said about the oversexualization of Black women. Whereas hypersexuality was viewed as a sin and a racist stereotype, it is now being pushed by radical, often white, feminists as a source of feminine pride.

In many cases, racial and ethnic minorities often bear the brunt of so-called progressive social experiments. We are damned both ways. On one side, we seek to empower ourselves, particularly our young women, to make smart choices, overcome social obstacles, and take pride in our heritage. On the other, we are left with the bill of trying to emulate the well-heeled and famous who can bear it all and still have a career at the end of the day. We can and should do better.

At present, young Black women are more likely to be pregnant as a teenager, be underemployed or unemployed, and be in poverty far more than their white counterparts. We also see the power dynamics at play in the struggle for equal pay and the persistence of intimate partner violence. Most Black folks know these struggles all too well. And yet, most of us stay silent when we see our Black women self-sabotage themselves by revealing more and seeking to oversexualize themselves.

As a collective society, we must not be tempted by the mystique championed by the decadent Left and radical feminists. We must not think that the way that we present ourselves don’t come with immediate societal clapbacks. They do. Most men don’t dare to speak out. And sadly, many Black women don’t either. Thus, silence fills the air as Black women are further subjugated by their own bad choices.

It is time that we collectively stand up to this decline in our fashion choices and in our morals. It is time that Black women love themselves to the extent that their bodies—and the gawdy exposure of them—should not be a factor. Our ancestors struggled so much and fought too hard for our women to now magically decide that being sex positive is acceptable. We must do better. It is time that we do better.

It is time that our Black women put their clothes back on.

Staff Writer; Christopher Anderson

One may connect with this brother online at: C. Anderson.

Also drop an email at;


67 Responses to “Black Women, You Can Put Your Clothes Back On.”
  1. Jim Turner says:

    This isn’t just a black woman phenomenon. I see this every day regardless of race. Let’s take going to the gym in the morning. Ladies Most yoga pants are see-thru. We men work out in baggy shorts and tee shirt. Why can’t you. I mean it’s like working out at a cabaret. I personally don’t like seeing a woman’s well-defined glutes in the morning. I had one woman stretching in front of a station I was at. Her yoga pants were so thin that I could see her vagina. Ladies stop sexualizing yourselves, you are too precious and have so much more to offer than just your bodies.

    Also, as a white person who has been to several black homes, I have seen in a majority of those home images of sexualization in open prominent display. I am talking about the paintings or statues of A black couple in a passionate embrace that adorns the walls or end tables in those homes. These are normally of a man and a woman in the nude.

    I have also listened to how black people of opposite sex speak to each other. Often it has a sexual overtone or innuendo to the back-and-forth flow of the conversation. However, I am and was brought up very conservative and Christian and firmly believe any sexual language should be in private between husband and wife. but that’s one of the very few differences I notice between black and white families where there are both parents in the home.

    Also, it’s hard to avoid when its being piped into our homes via TV shows, Streaming services and the internet. Or in our hands via smart phones. Porn is in our faces 24/7 and it distorts the proper role of sex and sexual relationships.

  2. claude holloway says:

    Leave something for my imagination, your thong in public is disgusting, if any man can see it I DONT WANT IT.

  3. Toshiba Francois says:

    I wrote a poem about this very thing. Please read below. I feel this is what set the Black woman on the path to being Naked.

    Poem: My Black man

    So much Hurt, so much pain. I hear it in the words you speak to me

    You continue to blame and degrade me.

    My black man you hurt me

    It seems the 1970’s was the last time you were proud of me, your chocolate daughter spitting image of thee

    I was your Baby Girl, your pride and joy, there was no disdain. Calling me your mini me

    It was there I would soak up your words, I took in your information whole heartedly

    However 1980s came and Reagan sent a chill through our black society

    Your desertion rather by force or by will, created eras of No Joy No Peace No sitting still

    So much Hurt, So much pain. I hear it in the words you speak to me

    You continue to blame and degrade me.

    My black man you hurt me

    You began to treat me like mastah I became your concubine; Use me abuse me and you tossed me to the side

    Running through females left and right you using your Dick like a piece of dynamite

    Your Baby girl became a frustration; but you flipped and pimped that, getting racks off the gold egg between her legs

    The 90’s is here, Black ebony to the rear; get you a snow bunny is what I hear

    Becky running things in her hustle and flow; she supposed to have ya back now?! Is that how this shit’s gone go?

    While I’m over here alone not understanding what went wrong, I see Snow bunny stepping in my zone

    What am I do but join in…. I need to get my Black man back!

    I’m taken Dick in the Rear, Giving up head out of fear of losing the one thing I thought was sacred that we both held dear

    So much Hurt, So much pain. I hear it in the words you speak to me

    You continue to blame and degrade me.

    My black man you hurt me

    You told Becky she was greater than me, that her white skin was pure intact; yet you try and manufacture a buffy the body builder got the bitch trying to look like me!

    Now greater than ever came a thing called cosmetic surgery!

    However once again I joined in; I’m half naked Lil john Dropping it low, Doing what I gotta do to hold your attention, Hey look I’m over here!

    A new millennium is here, Black man said Black woman too needy & Greedy get off your ass and get them Stacks!

    Black man said I was lazy; go get a job cause you section 8 crazy, Yo pussy stank, You fat Hoe, Ya weave wearing tramp, Gave you many reasons to supposedly flee..

    So I took your advice I went a step further; I got some degrees while you still out here selling keys..

    What did that do but get me more of the blame

    Because of my education I became dike Bitch too good to get on my knees..

    You Got damn right, See you made me strong a little in the wrong way now the cops is mulling you down and you begging me to stay. You wanna come home cause from the gate you knew you were wrong

    So much Hurt, So much pain. I hear it in the words you speak to me

    Yet you continue to blame and degrade me.

    My black man you hurt me

    So Black Man I need you to listen up and hear me clear

    No more degrading me No more talking bad about me. I am your Rib your Strength in disruption

    I am a Woman that hears your roars your cry and will hold you with compassion

    I am the rock that stops and Blocks the blow to your mind so why do you continue to try and take mine!

    I hold many degrees those of education and the ones from my ancestry women

    It is time to build and gain back our strength. I hold no ill will toward our Past.

    But from now on you need to get a grip and Stand up! Get the fuck up off your ass! And come protect me from the Serpent devil trying to divide Our WE!

    This is our solution: Hold your tongue in negativity, Come to talk about a resolution we can speak on anything involving the You & Me. It is a Must that we discuss

    I’ve got a head start but that’s by design by the end my game I’m leaving this white man blind

    See he Fucked with the better part of me; My Black man he essences is essential to me

    No more confusions No more disruption I’m taking the bull by the horn You on the Right, Me on the left

    This motha-fuKka will bow down before you and me. I need you to Stand Strong and Support me!

    So much Hurt, So much pain. I hear it in the words you speak to me

    You can no longer continue to blame or degrade me.

    My black man Please Stop hurting me

    Author Toshiba Francois

  4. Danielle says:

    Thank you for speaking truth! I am a black female, raised in a family of black strong independent women and men. The problem is the lack of modesty & class. Women are being sold a narrative of what is appealing and sexy to a few not the many. Tastelessness and lack of self respect is not sexy or appealing it’s sad and cheapens a beautiful gift that we have been blessed with! Women used to have some class. Knowing that.. true, you have the assets and curves but having the class and modesty to know the time and place to reveal said assets. We are not only about our curves & assets; so let’s not auction ourselves off as such. When we respect ourselves this aids in others respecting us as well.

    • Phyllis says:

      I wholeheartedly agree with you about modesty and class…those days have passed us by. I always say you don’t have to be loud, dress trashy or be damn near naked to get attention. I can wear a pair of jeans and a turtleneck and still get attention from men. It comes down to what type of men you are trying to attract.

      • Maurice says:

        Phyllis, I want to loudly Underscore this sentence in your response…

        “It comes down to what type of men you are trying to attract.”

        (I really wanted to post this in Bold 24 Font)

  5. Just a Jezebel says:

    Typical misogynistic homophobic black man. Don’t think I didn’t peep that anti-lgbt remark. Why don’t you tell black men the same thing? Keep their dicks in their pants? Nick cannon, p Diddy, dmx, and all those black men running around with hundreds of kids?

    White people oppress black women but so do black men. Trying to control black women. Fuck both of you. That’s why more black women are stepping off black men’s plantation. Let your white women fight for you when they kill you in the streets. They dress slutty too. Look at all them with their only fans.

    I reported you to Microsoft when I saw this article and will be reporting you as a hate site.

    • Larry says:

      No one can make you feel inferior unless YOU allow them to. Therefore, the blame does not rest on anyone but yourself. When Jesus Christ was being brutally beaten for our sins, they shamed Him by stripping Him down to His naked body. TOO SHAME HIM! So ladies, you set the tone of how you are judged. God gave us all free will on this earth. Please use it wisely because there is a day of atonement.
      Happy trails my friends. God bless you all.

  6. Marie says:

    Another misnomer in your article is that black women are “further subjugated by their own bad choices.” As you state, enslaved black women were brutally sexualized. No fault of their own. The same holds true for young girls and women who have been victimized, raped and/or sexualized by their own family members without fashion and lack of covering up as the precipitous. Maybe, you should be discussing control of sexual urges to boys and men.

  7. Marie says:

    While I understand the sentiment, you made an erroneous claim that “black women are more likely to be pregnant as a teenager.” Please practice research instead of making stereotypical claims, that you likely got from white mainstream media, about any group. The numbers show more caucasian females are pregnant as teens, become teen mothers, have abortions, or become single mothers than all other races combined in North America.


  9. Ashleigh Morris says:

    Or you can stop looking. It amazes me all of the “advice” and “opinions” black men have about everything except, being a black man. ESPECIALLY, when it come to the black woman. It’s truly amazing. And stop using these little girls as excuses to solicit your unwarranted opinion. If you don’t agree with it, raise them differently and leave it to the ones that are comfortable living their lives the way they choose outside of your “preferences”

    • NUNYA says:

      THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!! They always have something to say about black women but never address the issues they have within themselves and fellow black men. Its aggravating.

    • Savannah says:

      Right. RAISE THEIR DAUGHTERS PERIOD!! Where are the fathers behind all these observations! Thats right, too busy in the street, chasing white women now that sisters have gotten tired of taking care of them and coming home to find their house a mess.

  10. RTH says:

    Dear Writer(s), Thank you for this article! While I don’t have children, I certainly have a ton of nieces where I’m seeing this impact. I appreciate you caring enough to speak the truth, for it certainly is… I must say, it’s a bit surprising, and disheartening if I can speak candidly, about how many black women have taken this negatively and counter attacked on you speaking the truth. I think as a race, black people, our biggest downfall, leading into pitfalls, is our lack of ability to be self-aware, and hear the truth! Yes, black men certainly have some room to improve upon their appearance as well, but this doesn’t’ negate the truth about how black women, young ladies, and girls are dressing half naked and looking like they’re going to a nightclub on a daily basis. I appreciate someone caring enough, especially a brother and a father, to address this very impactful topic. Thank You!

  11. NUNYA says:

    As a black woman I agree to a certain extent. To only say black women are the only ones exposing themselves is a bit of a stretch. To only place the blame on women is wrong and all parties need to be addressed. I’m not sure to what extent the author is talking about but a little skin never hurt anyone. To stereotype someone based on how they dress without properly knowing them is ridiculous. Just because a BW wants to wear tight jeans or a fitted shirt, maybe even a crop top doesn’t mean she doesn’t respect herself. I know PLENTY well established, successful, respectful BLACK WOMEN who on occasion may wear something revealing. THAT DOES NOT WARRENT THEM DOWN TO BEING OVERSEXUALIZED. Just to make sure I’m understanding correctly, if a woman decides to wear something revealing, that make its justified for a man to oversexualize her? No accountability for men? It seems to me that women can’t win either way. I know a lot of modest women fully clothed and single because BLACK MEN don’t want them. So where is the line for men? Quick to judge a woman for lashes, makeup, nails, hair, clothes, etc. Yet I see men walking around with pants sagging, hair not combed and/ or cut, poor hygiene, smoking, just looking throwed away but who is addressing that? To be completely honest the title should have been “Black Community, We can do better!”. If we’re going to address one, then lets address all.

  12. Elizabeth says:

    So….to hear a heartfelt commentary by a Black Man on this subject is sooo very powerful! We have men and boys entrapped by sexual addictions of all kinds and no one seems to think that women and girls revealing our most precious God given gifts, our bodies, that should be reserved for that special man, is something to be taught or even conversated about. Fathers missing from a daughters life, that love from Daddy and learning to respect your body…young men not being taught to respect our beautiful black girls and women…these are just a few of the things that need to be addressed in the black culture in today’s society…So please count me in if theres a conversation that will be happening on this topic.

  13. cutitout says:

    And then what? Is that going to make men stop spending their lives from the age of 12-35 from trying to take the clothes off of as many women as they can? Is that going to make men commit to the women they father children with and be active and present in their lives? Is that going to increase the number of people of color pursuing higher education and moving up the ladder to create generational wealth? Is it going to make black folks vote? What things popstars wear, or what women wear to go clubbing or party in has nothing to do with anything meaningful. Same ole’ black folks worried more about what people wear to church then if they are getting the message.

  14. Trueletter says:

    I just want to say thank you, thank you, thank you!

  15. Tracey says:

    Amen! This article is impeccably well-written and reaches my very soul. I am also very discouraged by this movement of so-called “sexual empowerment” that teaches black women to lead with their bodies and not their intelligence or resilience, as if this is the accomplishment they prioritize. I am so moved by this article and would love to engage in conversations about what we can do as the black community to redirect this energy. I am a licensed clinical mental health therapist in my state and this discussion motivates me to do more research around what cognitive messages are distorting women’s value systems and how we can target what’s really happening. What is so validating about revealing your body in public? It’s never attractive and certainly not necessary. I have daughters and granddaughters and I’m ready to do something collective as a community. We need to start with those most visible in the public eye.

    • Maurice says:

      The more comments I read, I’m happy that I don’t necessarily need to make one of my own since so many are indeed expressing my sentiments on this subject. I have daughters and teenage granddaughters. As much as I preach to them, what they see on TV seems to have a greater influence on their fashion choices.

  16. lsmith says:

    Thanks Brother. You are so right.

  17. Stephanie says:

    THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU!!!!! It’s about time! People are so quick to complain about Black men being disconnected and not caring about the Black woman, but as soon as a Black man embraces his position as a leader, as a father, as an educator, as a voice to be heard, then all of a sudden he is “out of line” and needs to “check himself”. That is only because the truth stings!! As my granny used to say, “A hit dog will holler”. Those who are promoting the oversexualization of our Black women, and those who have fallen victim to the demeaning mindset that it’s okay to show whatever, do whatever, say whatever without consequence are usually the most vocal. Our Black women (YOUNG women at that) are literally dying trying to obtain the “perfect” body because so much of our society has made them feel that is they don’t dress or look a certain way then they are unworthy. But as the author said….look at the Black women who are truly legends and rebels. They didn’t do it twerking in string bikinis. Look at the career of say Lil Kim & Foxy Brown vs. that of say Queen Latifah & MC Lyte. How many butt pics have you seen from Oprah or Michelle Obama? No need to re-write the already excellent article, but I’m just so glad somebody finally said it!!!

  18. JAMES says:


    The Feminists, the Rainbow Mob and oversexualized entertainers are targeting our black women and children. We must be strong and push back. Even more disturbing is the cowardice of the so-called black leadership….particularly the preachers who refuse to address these issues. We can no longer rely on any type of moral leadership from them.

    What do we do? Stand strong on biblical principle. Acknowledge that HE made them male and female. Train our children to be respectable men and women. PROTECT THEM AT ALL COSTS…in the street, in the classroom and in behavior.

    It does not hurt to bond with like-minded folk.

    Do not be afraid to speak out!!! We are in the midst of spiritual warfare…To God be the glory…to be with God we can WIN!!

  19. Willowby says:

    Let’s Be Very Clear, The criticism of What Any Black Man has to say about Black women and their looks should fall on deaf ears. Because, before you “men” criticize us Black Women, how about you pull your pants up and choose to wear decent masculine proper clothing. It’s ironic, for Black men of All people who have left our communities in sheer shambles, raised by strong women, only to become successful themselves to snatch anything that lack any resemblance to those who supported and raised them. So, before ANY Black man decides to denigrate, comment, criticize anything we has Black Women Choose to Do, I think You Yourselves Have a Ton of Work to Do, in repairing our communities, family dynamics and structure etc. Until, then you have little if any footing by way a discourse in criticizing ANYTHING WE DO, AND HOW WE DRESS. YOU learn how to dress and carry yourselves with some dignity and respect and then we can have a discussion.

    • Elizabeth Hillsman says:

      Not good advice. Both needs to change and since women are the queens of creation I think his observation and encouragement ought to be well taken.

    • Christopher Anderson says:

      We can & should speak & tell black women everything, after all ,that’s the problem now. We’re the only race with women that DON’T LISTEN TO THEIR MEN, SUPPOSEDLY THAT WANT HUSBAND,GOD WON’T BE MOCKED!. That’s why men have all but abandoned black women, not for lack of trying to change them for the last 50 years, now she’s the least desired on the planet. How in the world are we not supposed to speak to y’all?? Well, you’ve gotten y’all wish in these last days, 80% black women will die alone now, fate.

      We don’t want it that way but that’s what it has come to be for a rebellious race of women. Black men marriage rates are going up, their finding other submission races of women. And as far as those “boys” pulling their pants up & fixing black homes?? You know studies have shown that’s coming from single mama ran homes,( still the women, straight out of order) Can’t even understand how to communicate with a man now. So I think it’s fitting that a man should tell black women what to do & they should have the decency & common sense to listen but no matter in this era, we’re not wasting our time, black women now are left to fin for themselves & rightly so.. judgment.

      • Savannah says:

        You realize that the reason there has been a disconnect between women listening to their men vs doing as they please is because too often women are placed in the position of leadership in the household? When you have “men” glued to their game controllers, asking to borrow the car that isn’t in their name so they can play with their friends all day, what woman in her right mind is trying to follow where they lead? Where are the men capable of credibility in this department? Those whose actions and actual support line up with what you’re saying.
        And while you’re talking about black men abandoning black women, please take a look around and recognize that the gander have followed the geese in that department. Strong, successful sisters are recognizing they don’t owe it to the race to wait on a good BLACK man. They will attach themselves to just a GOOD MAN whose capable and has his crap together and don’t mind if he’s green in the end. If another race is checking for us, stepping up RESPECTFULLY with their lives together, expect the migration to continue and we just all gonna be looking at a pretty beige world. lol

      • Savannah says:

        Please be mindful of painting us all with the same brush. A great many of us no longer feel its a life goal to “get a husband”. Especially when men of substance aren’t coming for us, but still headed in the direction of Becky or women they can convince themselves are light enough for them.
        We don’t have a problem listening to a GOOD man worth being heard. You seem to want us to believe melanin and a dick is enough to get our obedience.

    • Tyrone Hyman says:

      You are right men should pull their pants up I agree. But what is more disturbing are the group of black women who love, cherish, support, & accept these men into their homes, lives, & spirit. Women are naked now because there are many in society that accept it. Men have their pants pulled down because they know there are many women in society who will accept them. So if you take the attention away from both problems then you might be on the path to true change. It is not a tit for tat scenario it is reality. And someone speaking on reality should not be silenced.

    • Tiye says:

      These points (what Black women can do and what Black men need to do) are not mutually exclusive. Both can be addressed at the same time.

  20. Gwen says:

    It would also be helpful if the many women who dress modestly and tastefully were the ones being asked out on dates by men most of the time and not sitting at home or hanging with their girlfriends. People say one thing and do another. The author does make a valid point that black women bear the brunt (or in other words, get the short end of the stick) in this new narrative. In comparison to others, they are no more or less immoral or distasteful in their actions, they are blamed for all of society’s ills and to boot, the same men who pursue them because of the way they dress or behave, leave them behind in the dust (oftentimes with children) as they build the American dream (wife, kids, house, etc.) with someone else. Girls and women, open your eyes and don’t fall for the okey doke!!

    • Savannah says:

      I agree overall! And I’ll take it a step further. Goose and gander. Go where the love and respect are and stop holding out for the black unicorn; the ultimate black man who has his life together and is checking for a black woman. ANY GOOD black woman, not just one whose fair skinned, long haired and Barbie doll shaped.
      I see sisters all around who have opened their eyes and recognized that they need to go where the love and respect are.

      • Toastie says:

        Yes, girl. I did! Expanded my options and stopped using “Black” as a priority for a good man. Opened my mind and my heart…and now I am HAPPILY married for years, to an employed, hard working good man who loves our daughter more than life. She is growing up in a stable two parent household, two incomes and having to want for NOTHING. Black men make up around 8% of the US population…so most “black man only” black women are fishing from a VERY small pool, then wonder why they are 42 sitting at home researching how to freeze her eggs…with no husband, no kids, three cats and a prescription for anti-depressants. My youngest cousin just got back from her honeymoon with her incredible new Italian hubby…and my college bestie just had a second son with her Indian one. So, yes, you are correct…we need to go to who is interested and not just who is Black. Then you will basically laugh at these type of articles from Black guys trying to shame and police BW. I just…dont care anymore…LOL, I am GOOD. 🙂

  21. Mary says:

    I love this article and the truth reveled about Black women exposing their bodies. “Brainwashed To Brilliance Recovering From Slavery” Black women were objectified during slavery and now some are objectifying themselves. It’s a representation of the slave mentality. I would even say some are ignorant in believing they have to show it all to be accepted or believe they are accepted by mainstream society. Is it necessary to expose your body? I will even call it deviant behavior. African Americans are brilliant. Let’s be brilliant instead of ignorant in the choices we make. These women who are exposing their bodies publicly must realize they are role models for upcoming generations. We can do better.

    • Elizabeth Hillsman says:

      This is a wonderful, timely and very relevant article. I think it needs to be present from many pulpits in our churches and echoed in our Sunday School and Christian education classes. Blessings!

  22. noyb myob says:

    Yes! I a sick of all the flesh being shown. Black women should return to the fashions of the fifties, forties; with dresses and slacks below the knee and short sleeves near the elbows. No need for plunging necklines and let us return to camisoles, panties, and slips underneath out clothes. And stop showing cleavage everyone knows that women have breasts. No need to advertise.

  23. Bootsie says:

    This is very true precise and to the point, capturing all the main points and when you call them out the mother’s get upset & want to fight but they can’t because they let them leave home dressed in that manner (thinking it’s cute), like that or they change outfits on the corner of the block or the bus. And our young men wearing pants below the butt showing their underwear thinking this is hip not knowing the real meaning behind the hold thing, thinking it’s fashion, but it’s not just because you see someone do it you need to find out the real reason why, it’s a thug’s mentality, which started inside the prison system (drop a bar of soap), need I say more to get the message out. So young men pull your pants all the way up!!!!!!!!! Be A Man!!!

  24. Diane says:

    Thank you, thank you for sharing something I have thought about many times. I, too, feel a sense of dismay to see my sisters allowing themselves to be exploited. Our sisters need to recognize that being sexy goes a long way beyond revealing the body. Ladies, we can be sexy by exercising our mindset, seeking and sharing knowledge, and speaking with a tongue that expresses intelligence.

    • Tiye says:

      Women need to understand that they can be sexy AND classy. It upsets me so much to see our Black women reducing themselves to a mere sex object. Despite what they think they are not claiming/reclaiming or taking ownership of their sexuality by showing ALL of their stuff! Such a low-level way of going about the art of being sexy with class.

  25. Brenda says:

    I agree to the fullest. I am so concerned for our sister espceially the younger ones. I remember back in the 1900’s the Black women from celebrities, maids,cooks, housewives and so on were beautiful. Go to the internet and look it up. They wore their dresses, stockings and heels. Yes they had struggles but they had pride. They were Ladies. Now our women go to church, on stage with low cut dresses and just wearing what they want. Our young girls don’t. have a chance. They think it’s ok.
    For all of us that care we must pray and teach our girls and young ladies it’s not ok. We are living in Sodom and Gomor times. It is all in the Bible. than you my Brother it needed to be said.

  26. Raymond says:

    Thank you for speaking up. Your points were well made and spot on.
    Please do not forget the male rappers who consistently demean and degrade women (black and white) in their videos creating a false narrative for impressionable young black girls. This does nothing more than drives their self-esteem to the floor where they hope by displaying them their bodies and acting in lewd and lascivious fashion, they may gain the favor of a male. Unfortunately, the only end result of that is to be used and abused and cast aside. I have seen it too many times.

  27. Lori says:

    Brilliantly presented. As the mother of a 13-year old daughter and 4 millennials (3 sons and 1 daughter), I am simply exhausted by the barrage of half-naked African America females appearing on TV/YouTube/TikToc/Instagram and in my sons’ DMs. If young women could just hear what my college-educated, handsome, successful sons ALL say about those who dress with butt-cheeks and breasts on display they would be shocked especially since my sons are considered popular and “cool”. Sure, my sons MIGHT date the half-naked for a while to pass the time, but tall 3 sons have made it VERY clear they are looking for a “respectable” girl to marry as they approach the age of 30. None of them want to see anyone they are serious about walking around or on display online half-naked. I am still embarrassed for Ciara with her latest “outfit” at the Oscars.

    But our women aren’t the only ones who need to seriously reconsider their public appearance. As I watch the NCAA Men’s Tournament or NBA games, I am mortified by some of the hairstyles on display by the players. While I am all for embracing our natural hair textures, our men don’t have to look like Rastafarians to be culturally authentic. Celebrities and professional athletes don’t need to impress anyone for a job, raise, community recognition, mortgage, etc. They don’t have to care what people think about their appearance. But just as being half-naked suggests to many that a woman is sexually lose or whorish, Black men wearing deadlocks or matted afros are often cast as militant, unkempt, uneducated, thuggish, or lower class.

    Black men, you can start going back to the barber every 2 weeks. And pull up your pants while you are at it!

  28. alic says:

    Hey Christopher, stop telling women what to do.

  29. Barbara says:

    TOUCHE, and thanks to the person who added this piece; “our young men should comb their hair, pull up their pants, and end the toxic name calling claimed also to be freedom of expression. Finally, we must uplift our children embrace and love them. They are our ancestor’s wildest dream! Our mere existence is a testimony to their magnificent legacy of endurance, resilience and survival.

    Parents get involved in this dialogue.

  30. Barbara says:

    TOUCHE, and thanks for this piece as well….. “our young men should comb their hair, pull up their pants, and end the toxic name calling claimed also to be freedom of expression. Finally, we must uplift our children embrace and love them. They are our ancestor’s wildest dream! Our mere existence is a testimony to their magnificent legacy of endurance, resilience and survival.

    Parents get involved in this dialogue.

  31. Elaine says:

    Thank you! Your article captures the dilemma our young women face. Our children have been under attack under the guise of “freedom,” girls are encouraged to debase and pornographically objectify their precious body, mind and spirit, in ways that only two generations ago would’ve been inconceivable and profoundly rejected. We have helplessly watched our children torn asunder by the insidious and debasing realms of pop culture, that have captured their attention and blinded their minds.

    Not only should our young women put their clothes on, our young men should comb their hair, pull up their pants, and end the toxic name calling claimed also to be freedom of expression. Finally, we must uplift our children embrace and love them. They are our ancestor’s wildest dream! Our mere existence is a testimony to their magnificent legacy of endurance, resilience and survival.

  32. Tyler says:

    Thank you so much for being brave enough to write this piece. I totally agree with everything you said, and I appreciate that this came from a place of love and respect for black women. I have 3 teenage girls and I struggle to combat the negative influences of this agenda that twists the concepts of women empowerment and feminism.

  33. CW says:

    as a black female, I completely agree!

  34. Barbara says:

    An incident transpired when Muhammad Ali’s daughters arrived at his home wearing clothes that were quite revealing.

    Here is the story as told by one of his daughters:

    “When we finally arrived, the chauffeur escorted my younger sister, Laila, and me up to my father’s suite. As usual, he was hiding behind the door waiting to scare us. We exchanged many hugs and kisses as we could possibly give in one day.

    My father took a good look at us. Then he sat me down on his lap and said something that I will never forget. He looked me straight in the eyes and said, “Hana, everything that God made valuable in the world is covered and hard to get to.

    Where do you find diamonds? Deep down in the ground, covered and protected.
    Where do you find pearls? Deep down at the bottom of the ocean, covered up and protected in a beautiful shell.
    Where do you find gold? Way down in the mine, covered over with layers and layers of rock. You’ve got to work hard to get to them.”

    He looked at me with serious eyes. “Your body is sacred. You’re far more precious than diamonds and pearls, and you should be covered too.”

    From the book: More Than A Hero: Muhammad Ali’s Life Lessons Through His Daughter’s Eyes.

  35. Teesa says:

    I agree with you on Black women should put their clothes back on. Its becoming too vulgar and its, over the top. Like why to promote their music or other artiste music, movies, fashion etc, that we need to be showing our bodies and sticking our tongues out like a dog waiting to lick something. I live in Miami, FL, and from teenagers to grown women are walking around naked barely wearing anything, whether they have a great body or obese. Its not cute at all. Thank you for putting this message out there.

  36. Celeste Miller says:

    Thank you for sharing this, brother Anderson. I don’t do this often, but I was compelled to post this on my Facebook timeline. I pray our sisters who are caught up in this mess will wake up to the reality of what is happening, and choose to change, to love and respect themselves, to dress and live with dignity.

  37. Tiffany T. says:

    Thank you, so much for this insightful message. I am a black woman, who has two teenage sons and I worry if they would even find a woman, who is decent enough to even date. These Black women in the entertainment business have disgraced the black female culture. The young females don’t even know how to carry themselves as classy women with integrity.

  38. Kevin says:

    To the staff writer that wrote this article…I would like to say “TOUCHE!” How many times have said (and felt) the same way about our black women? Especially the young black girls who look up to entertainers, rappers, stars, etc. When are we as a people going to “wake up” and realize that this is another to keep them enslaved. I’m an adjunct professor who has been seeing our young women practically coming to class half dressed. With the makeup, long weaves, eyelashes, and claws, that are supposed to be fingernails.
    In closing, I would like to say the staff who wrote this article I couldn’t agree with you more. You were more than right on point. I want to see our young people to continue to succeed and not be a part of the societal stereotypes.

    • Sharon says:

      Excellent, excellent writing. So glad to see more Black men speaking on this issue. Most young girls and women don’t realize that they have bought into the agenda of sexual exploitation through the images they see. Where are the “Claire Hustable’s”? The only time I can see a covered Black woman is on a rerun from the eighties? Could that be an agenda? Black female exploitation is a billion-dollar industry and everything promoted is intended to make somebody rich. Thank you for speaking out. You’re right. We must do better.

  39. Kevin says:

    To the staff writer that wrote this ariticle…I would like to say “TOUCHE!”

    • Gina says:

      Wow. we the only ones right? Ok. yet another black man not holding black men accountable. its ALL the black womans fault. Gotcha.

      • Joseph says:

        Gina, I fully concur with your statement which seems to imply and subtly suggests, the black man isn’t holding himself somewhat accountable for the issues related to black women…YES, we have failed our women on many, many fronts, from the pulpit to the streets…black men did not “run to the fight” to protect and “take the hit” in defense of black women. However, this writer is merely unveiling a subtle detrimental movement that seeks to further degrade the black woman as only an object of sexual gratification…and, It Sells! I am proud to say after almost 46 years of marriage to a superbly magnificent black woman, with two educated and well-anchored daughters, I did my part…with my Wife, Partner, and Best Friend’s help. I didn’t know things because we were not taught how to act, because our fathers didn’t know! SO, on behalf of black men and specifically the writer, we are sorry if the article seems to suggest blame on the women only…that is woefully off track.

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