(ThyBlackMan.com) In America “black” people are stereotyped every day of the week. African-Americans are profiled as predators, animals, criminals, thugs, niggers, hoochies, knuckleheads and chicken heads. Every other ethnic group (including Africans, Haitians and Jamaicans) looks down on the American-born “black” man. He is generally expected to be ignorant, dangerous and a hustling procrastinator who tries to “get over” on and blame everybody else for his problems. And guess what? In many cases many of the stereotypes are completely accurate. But not always, not for all of us. It does not have to be that way and things have to change. So instead of getting offended, look in the mirror.
I am not saying you should let any ethnic group nor gender define you, maybe no ethnic group but your own and of course your Creator. But the opinions and perceptions of other groups are important because they shape laws and policies, corporate protocols, education and social norms of behavior. We people of color do not live in a bubble and we have to compete against people of all colors and ethnicities. So yes, what they think or perceive matters – incorrect or not.
PEOPLE WITH LOW STANDARDS GET OFFENDED QUICKLY WHEN CORRECTED! They are comfortable in the deep, dark, slave-like cave – no matter how much it hurts them and retards their potential.
I am saying brothers you can do better – much better. You can do better and be more when you know who you are, when you expect more of yourself and when you stop making slave-like “I’m the victim of society” excuses which block you from thinking on a higher level. Nobody is perfect and certainly I don’t think I am but I do my best and I don’t make excuses. I learn from my mistakes and try not to make the same ones again. I listen to others, implement regular self-assessments and welcome the constructive criticism and correction from others. I count on accountability by others in order to help be become better, smarter, stronger and wiser – all the while making fewer and fewer mistakes. What about you? It’s time to step up your standard instead of always trying to step up your game. Life is not a game.
You did not become an adult to make the mistakes children make and use the excuses teenagers use. You didn’t (or shouldn’t have) become an adult to make the wrong choices and adopt the bad habits that work against you. And isn’t it enough that they have sought to oppress and destroy you, even using African-American women to aid in the plan? You do not need to help them bring you down.
RAISE YOUR STANDARDS IN THE WOMAN YOU SELECT
Clearly by now any wise man should know everything that looks good is not good for you, all that glitters is not gold and you cannot judge a book by its cover. No matter how fine she is, how good she smells or what she whispers in your ear. Of course if you are the bottom of the barrel or bottom of the food chain yourself, you have to raise your standards before you even deserve a good woman who has already raised hers. That being said, when you raise your standards for the woman you choose, women will have to step up their actions and improve their attitudes. And you should require her best, no gold diggers.
If we think we are so “grown” that we cannot learn and be corrected, we have only grown to become fools who think we know much more than we actually do. We must allow ourselves to learn from uncomfortable correction. And unless you know everything, learn to be quiet, listen and learn.
RAISE YOUR STANDARDS IN WHAT YOU EXPECT FROM YOURSELF
Keep your word. Follow through – and not just when you could get fired or in trouble with the law. Have great expectations instead of becoming complacent in mediocrity. Reward yourself when you do well but punish yourself when you don’t. Punishment for avoidable failures and lack of effort is something African-Americans almost never do to ourselves. Why not? We need to overstand the consequences of mistakes so we will not shrug them off and continue to make them. You best believe this truth is imposed on us by our employers, law enforcement, the courts, our companions and life itself in the form of karma, reaping what you have sewn or the boomerang coming right back at you. Many of those I just mentioned don’t always have your best interest at heart, but you should. And thus you should be just as quick to punish yourself as you are to reward yourself.
RAISE YOUR STANDARDS IN YOUR FINANCES
Wealth should never define who you are. It should rather be a result of who you are and a manifestation of what you have accomplished. Thus there is a major difference between wealth and materialism. Wealth is what a person has. Materialism is when that wealth has him. And materialism is not a good thing because it requires a servant – you.
Pay off your debts, build your credit and only use it when you have to. Even then only in a disciplined manner. All too often African-American parents cannot be a good example for our youth because too many parents are in debt, broke, near broke or living paycheck to paycheck, living above their means, buying to keep up with the Jones’, buying for the approval of others, being consumers instead of investors and failing to follow any sound budget or financial plan. Of course this is not a problem exclusive to the “black” community, but my primary concern is not about any other group.
RAISE YOUR STANDARDS IN YOUR RELATIONSHIPS
Expect the best from your companion, require it, bring it and help him (or her respectively) get there. Resolve problems in the best way which creates a win-win for the relationship, not just for one of you. In a relationship both should win or both should lose. That is the only fair way. Both of you should sit down and define your expectations for yourselves and each other, how each person should be treated, how each person should behave and what the relationship itself should produce. Define for your children what a man is and what a woman is, not confusing the two, their uniquely different functions nor who they should desire. Let’s stop this confused LGBTQ nonsense.
When it comes to your relationship, choose wisely. Not just based on factors like her looks, her body, her interest in you and what she tells you. Look deeper, expect a lot. Tell her who you are, where you want things to go, what you expect and what you will or won’t accept. Standards my brother, hard line standards you have to stick to and mean it when you say them. Plus good women like when men are focused on what they want, stable and decisive. If you don’t master the art of choosing the right type of woman, raising your standards and placing them in stone so to speak, you will likely end up helping to fill up the divorce court, the child support case file or both and then some. Believe that, seriously.
RAISE YOUR STANDARDS IN WHAT YOU EXPECT FROM OTHERS
You don’t have the right to expect more from others until you expect at least that much from yourself. I had a chance to tell government workers during the Trump shutdown many years ago – a similar message. I told them they did not have the right to expect the government to take care of them until they could expect to take care of themselves. That includes the misguided expectation that your job should pay $15 an hour so the company can take care of you. People need to realize the company or corporation is not in business to take care of you and your needs,. That is your responsibility. They are in business to offer a product or service and make a profit. Once you overstand this truth, you will see things differently.
When you expect more from others, many will migrate away from you. Why? Because their standards for themselves are far too low and your expectation becomes a mirror reflection or reminder of that fact. Thus such a mirror will make them uncomfortable because they don’t want to raise their standards or don’t believe they can. They live in denial, taking the position “I’m good” when really they are not, not at all. When they think deeply about it at all, they measure themselves against people who are not doing as well as they are. In essence measuring themselves against what is below them instead of the potential above them. Don’t do this and don’t accept when others close to you do it.
The good news is when you expect more from others, some of them will rise up and do better. This helps you and them. This expectation breaks mental chains, shakes off slothfulness and mediocrity and unleashes potential. So in essence you both win. We all need to realize this.
RAISE YOUR STANDARDS IN KNOWING YOUR RIGHTS
Just recently a watchdog group released proof of hundreds of racist cops in several states around this country – and that just scratches the surface. You need to know your rights. How dumb is it to fail to know the very laws that govern and regulate you every single day? You gotta read people, you gotta read. Google, books, research and the public library should not be the enemies of the African American community. Police officers act based on what they think or believe, whether it is correct or not. So you need to know how to handle a police encounter, what not to do (or reach for) and what your desired outcome should be. Michael Brown, Eric Garner, Sandra Bland, Philando Castile and so many others thought they knew but they didn’t. Know your rights and what to do in an encounter with the police because it could mean life or death – yours. Raise your standards in enhancing your personal knowledge regarding your safety and spread the word on this.
In conclusion, if you are offended, don’t hide behind offense to run away from improvement. You can do better, be better, rise higher, do more and expect more from others around you. If they don’t like it, that’s their problem. But it does not have to be yours. “Black” Man Raise Your Standards!
Staff Writer; Trevo Craw
