(ThyBlackMan.com) Remember when you and your partner talked to each other on a date or just in the comforts of your home together? Remember at dinner time, when you talked about what happened throughout your day with your family and together, you brainstormed and resolved any issues that may have happened that day? Well those days, seems to be long gone. Social media may be one of the reasons for this lack of connection or conversations.
To see a pretty woman in lingerie, we had to physically go to the local newsstand and purchase the latest magazine or turn straight to the middle of any Jet magazine for the “Beauty of Week” and admire the curves of a beautiful black women in a bathing suit. Now a day, we can just scroll through our timelines and see graphic
images and videos of women dressed provocatively in photos and showing us their birthday suits literally in private messages. We then emotionally connect with these women virtually and neglect our spouse and children because they no longer give us that instant gratification that we desire.
Instead of being in the moment, we feel the need to capture every moment just to get a like or comment or to show off our latest adventures or excursion. We are going to restaurants just to take pictures of the foods we’re eating instead of flirting with our partners underneath the tables. Our partners feel neglected because we can easily converse online with strangers but are left with empty words to speak to our partner who is sitting right next to us. We have been stimulated throughout the day, by others that we simply just aren’t interested in our loved ones as the day is winding down.
Social media has its ups and downs as with anything else in life. But usually the downs are ruining relationships. Families are breaking up because husbands are found sending explicit messages to another woman in her “DM” and of course the other woman screenshots everything and sends it to his wife. Drama. Men are catching their wives or partners sending other men nude pictures and videos, but refuses to have sex with them.
Instead of telling and showing the world “What’s on your mind” try being more present with the person you are with. Put the phone away or turn it off and give the person or people you are with your time and undivided attention. Neglecting to be present today, can cause you to lose your family tomorrow. Virtual connections are important but physical connections will always be better. Our black families have been more and more female led due to but not limited to: mass incarceration, single parenting, death due to violent incidents, domestic violence and failed marriages. We do not need to add, because of social media to this list.
Stop seeking validation from people on social media. How many followers you have or the lack thereof, doesn’t determine your worth. Sexual content in the forms of text or images with a stranger should not replace intimacy with your partner. Pay attention to your family more than the amount of screen time you use online. It’s great to capture moments throughout your life experiences, but it is not healthy to be addictive to capturing every moment of your life. If you are having problems in your relationship or not sure how to be the world’s greatest parent, read a book that talks about that problems or skills you want to learn, or talk to your partner. You don’t have to feel obligated to connect with people via social media to navigate through your life.
Staff Writer; Felicia T. Simpson
One may also connect with this sister online over at; FTSimpson.com.