(ThyBlackMan.com) Ministering fire and brimstone upon the heads of women has to stop! Let’s be honest there are some ministers that harp on the subject of women more than anything else its condemning and wrong. Everything in black community is not the fault of women. Every problem in the church is not the fault of women. If the sexual behavior of women is so damning then the behavior of the man that was involved is as damning. Women are marrying at an older age, and some of them do not want children. There are many components as to why, but let’s look at the part church men and family have had to play.
This problem goes back to how we raise our boys verses our girls. Boys can be wild, and free to explore their sexuality. As they get older women are implored to be patient with them and be mindful of their ever fragile egos. However, we raise our daughters to believe if they aren’t virgins when they marry they are whores…that they must be undefiled. That if they have babies out of wedlock they are contributing to the destruction of community and they are indeed an embarrassment. Pastors are quick to remind us that as sure as we bear life we must govern ourselves to a higher standard than our male counterparts.
REALITY CHECK men you help fuel the feminist mindset among some women. They have been condemned by you, and they have set back and watched you tear down women that take a stand. “Woman be silent.” I’m sure many men have heard it, and even quoted this passage, but did you take the time to understand the context of the passage? Women are not to merely be silent, and meek as a mouse. Women are not to be handled or spoken down to like they are children. There are gifted sisters that are strong, yet respectful, and they have the courage to stand and speak the truth. They are not Jezebel and ought not be confined to your limited thinking.
A woman that can think for herself is not a threat to a man. Honestly brothers…if there are too many women vying for control, and you feel ran over you really should look at where you are in your walk. Real women don’t want to usurp you, but they don’t want to be lied to nor have their faith used as a way to control them in ways God did not intend. We give birth to your children…but we are not children.
This sexist condemnation within the church has to come to an end before the backbone that supports it begins to walk away. There are some sisters that have to find another place to worship because there are pastors that make their personal experiences with women as sermon of fire and brimstone that burn all women. No one is perfect, but brothers this is not ok. Be fair in your rebuke. God calls us to be holy, and that doesn’t have a gender attached to it. Truth be told no one is supposed to commit adultery nor fornication those are lot laws intended for women only. Just as women can be whores so can men. Just as women can vie for unholy control…so can men. We have to start being honest about character.
If men are supposed to be “head” then the correction must start with them aside from us completely. Granted that’s not something men are going to want to hear. It takes a man to teach a boy to be a man true enough, but the same applies to girls and women. Too many church men folk want to dictate to women on how to be such in ways that don’t line up to scripture, but you tell your male counterparts nothing. Women are to honor their husbands, but husbands can talk crazy to their wife and berate her in front of her kids…and is the pastor going to speak on it?
I am a Christian, and I respect Men of God that walk what they preach. I understand no one is perfect. However, let’s not get on a woman brow beating while giving your male counterparts every excuse there is for ill behavior. If we can’t be truthful, and fair with each other…the church will continue to down spiral.
Staff Writer; Christian Starr
May connect with this sister over at Facebook; https://www.facebook.com/christian.pierre.9809 and also Twitter; http://twitter.com/MrzZeta.
To The Author,
As much as many black women have beat down black men spiritually, financially, emotionally etc, I wonder if you have a balanced perspective to speak about that as well. As a family and relationship counselor who has counseled thousands of couples, men, women and families, I have to stick to the whole truth and all the facts. Bias is dangerous.
I am against sexism in the church and clearly women are equal to men. But that does not mean the roles are the same. Clearly it was Adam then woman who he in fact named her Eve after the fall. Clearly Pastor is a Latin word for Shepherd and there were no sheperdesses. Clearly chain of command is father, Son then Holy spirit – all masculine. Clearly it is Christ then his bride.
What many women do not understand is how thee kingdom authority works. In God’s kingdom you can have three persons with three different roles yet all of them are equal. They are no less than the other. that is how the Trinity operates but that is so foreign to human beings that women often rebel against it.
The Bible specifically directs women to teach the women. God does not have double standards but man has plenty of them. Yet man’s double standards which are wrong should not be confused with the authority god has set up for the kingdom which is reflected in both the home and the church. God is consistent.