Friday, March 24, 2023

Steve Harvey, Think Like A Man Pimp.

July 25, 2012 by  
Filed under News, Opinion, Relationships, Weekly Columns

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( I was sitting in the living room of my parent’s home in Louisville, KY watching the new Janks Morton film, “Hoodwinked.”  Janks sent me a copy a while back, but this was the first time I’d had a chance to watch the film in its entirety.  I am in the film, along with some outstanding scholars:  Jawanza Kunjufu, Steve Perry, Marc Lamont Hill and Ivory Toldson.

I’d heard the film was good, but it was even better than I’d expected.  Janks did a wonderful job of basically explaining that all is not what it seems when it comes to black men and our relationships with black women.  For example, Janks provides compelling evidence to show that the black male high school dropout rate is not nearly as bad as the 50% number that’s been sold to the media.  In fact, according to the National Center for Education Statistics, black males had a lower dropout rate than black females for the years 2006 – 2008, and actually had an average drop out rate in 2006 and 2007 that was lower  than the average among all ethnic groups.

The point in the film where my jaw hit the floor was when Morton spoke of Steve Harvey and his franchise “Think Like a Man.”  Morton argues that men like Steve Harvey have profited handsomely from the black female relationship crisis by convincing women to believe that they are in a dire state of affairs when actually, things are not quite as bad as the media makes them out to be.  I’m sure Mr. Harvey might take offense to being referred to as a pimp, so I wanted Janks to explain his position a bit further.

After I reached out to Janks to get him to explain his position on Steve Harvey, he sent me this response below.  I figured you could hear it right out of the filmmaker’s mouth:


[pimp] noun

1. a person, especially a man, who solicits customers for a prostitute or a brothel, usually in return for a share of the earnings; pander; procurer.

2. a despicable person.

6. to exploit.

During the closing segment of HOODWINKED I explore briefly the solution postulate advanced by comedian turned relationship guru Steve Harvey in his book THINK LIKE A MAN. In order for Black Women to overcome the dire circumstances and relationship tribulations in navigating the shortage of uneducated, undereducated, unemployed, emotionally unavailable, down-lowing, white woman lusting, irresponsible, wayward degenerate that is the characterization of the modern era Black Man, Black Women should look to dating older men to find viable potential partners in their quest for healthy relationships.

In’ my closing remarks, I state “I’ve heard that before…that’s a pimp”, a commentary that is directed at primarily at the construct of matching younger women with older men, but also at Mr. Harvey’s solution as an either ill-informed, bipolar, disingenuous or at worst a manipulative and exploitative proposition, once again inflamming the fears and anxieties of women who have bought into the artificial construct that is the “Black Relationship Crisis.”

Dr. Ivory Toldson in his piece “Are There Enough Successful Black Men for the Black Women Who Want Them?” outlines poignant data and facts about the state of Black Men, which I would refer your readers to understand that things are “not as traumatic and dramatic ~ Dr. Boyce Watkins: HOODWINKED” as we may think. But moreover, for your African American Women readers I would like to leave them with several points;

  1. This whole conversation was initiated by a statistic reported on Nightline that 42% of African American Women had never been married
  2. From the same data set 45.3% of African American Men had never been married either
  3. There is massive industry associated with identity, esteem and ultimately the relationship status of women.
  4. If these industries can get convince you that there is a problem, then you look to them for a solution (Think Like a Man~ the film: opened at $33 million and no. 1 at the box office)
  5. Between the ages 18-24 there are 1.8 Million African American Women who have grown up fatherless. It is exploitive and irresponsible to direct these vulnerable young women into the potential chasm of filling father-absence and void-vacancy issues with a surrogate model.
Would I call Steve Harvey a pimp?  I’m not so sure.  I would certainly say that he is an opportunist, but then again, there is nothing wrong with taking advantage of an opportunity.  But while there is nothing wrong with taking advantage of an opportunity, there is definitely something wrong with utilizing an opportunity to take advantage of another human being.  It’s hard to argue that black female relationship insecurity is not the driving force behind the massive millions earned by “Think Like a Man,” and one would not expect a doctor to find a cure to the disease that is filling up his bank account.
By touting the black male crisis as the source of all relationship woes, we are giving black women an emotional crutch that effectively allows them to become devoid of any accountability for their own failed relationships.  The same way a person might use racism as their excuse for not going out to look for a job, too many black women are allowed to use this so-called relationship crisis as their excuse for not pursuing the self-improvement necessary to have healthy interactions with men.  Rather than engaging in honest reflection of what she may have done to ruin her relationship, there is yet another ABC News special to convince her that her ex-boyfriend probably wanted a white woman anyway.
For the women reading this article, I could save you a lot of money that you might be tempted to spend on your next Steve Harvey book by giving you this free advice:  If you work to be a healthy person, you are far more likely to have healthy relationships.  But if you walk into a situation with more baggage than American Airlines, then your lack of trust will always kill your ability to find true and meaningful love.  Thinking like a man doesn’t even make any sense, in large part because you’re a woman.  Personally, I don’t know too many men who’d want to date a woman who thinks like another dude.
Staff Writer; Dr. Boyce Watkins
Dr. Boyce Watkins is the founder of the Your Black World Coalition. For more information, please visit


9 Responses to “Steve Harvey, Think Like A Man Pimp.”
  1. Omalone1 says:

    Gwiz. Money Issues in black male female relationships

  2. Papacool says:

    America is the land of opportunity and I can not blame Steve Harvey for taking advantage of his. He is entitled to his point of view and we all have the choice of either agreeing or disagreeing with it. All I know is that if I wanted to date a man then I would. However, I am not into that and my preference is a female who can use her own brain to make decisions. We all know that fads come and go, but the world will still keep turning no matter what. The old school togetherness is what works for me, holding hands, taking walks, and never letting a day go by without saying I love you is almost a thing of the past. I find myself thinking of all the people I have met during my lifetime and can appreciate those that hung together through the bad and good times to celebrate long relationships, such as a 50 year anniversary, kids that grew up to make a positive impact on the world, and finally living by example. I now appreciate the whippings, cussing out, and expectation of doing one’s best. One must remember that Steve is an entertainer, but he has had his own fair share of problems. The great thing about it is how he handles his business. I just take notes and try to sift things out to the degree of implementing the good within my own life without being hypocritical. Woman are just doing things that men have always done, but now it is being done openly. It is hard on us brothers to see our sistas with a white dude, but how did they feel when we jumped the race barrier?

    If we dish it out, then we have to take it as well. Scandal is just one avenue of entertainment that exposes this NEW faze of love. I just wonder when there will be a show with a successful brother with his forbidden love counterpart, the white girl? They tried it with Ironside, but the brother was in a wheelchair, so he was not a real threat. Plus the show got cancelled before the miracle of him walking again and having an erection could take place. Whew, that was close.

    Maybe Kanye and Kim will rend the curtain and let the public know what goes on behind closed doors. On second thought, keep it in the closet. Peace out, Papacool

  3. toomanygrandkids says:

    @Ramses…well said.
    I wouldn’t call Steve a pimp. Hadn’t thought of him in that way. I read one of his books but I havn’t read the second one. Can’t remember much about the first book b/c it’s been years since I read it. But I do remember that Steve didn’t say that the book pertained to black or white. He didn’t mention race at all. I believe that’s the main reason why it was considered a best seller. Black and white women purchased that book. If Steve had wrote specifically about black men then black women and women who attracted to black men only would’ve bought the book.

    Now the sistah Ramses mentioned Sharahazad(sp) Ali gave me more information and “schooling” than ANY book about relationships. Today, tomorrow, and forever I would purchase this sistah’s books before Steve’s. And not b/c she’s a black women but she’s a black woman who I respect. She researched black ppl for 40 yrs. Sometimes, I can’t even be around folks for 40 mins., let alone 40 yrs. Her reaserch took her around this country. And I could relate to what she had written b/c I could see myself and others on those pages. I thought, “Wow, now this sistah knows what she’s talking about.” I watch her on youtube and till this very day read her books. Especially the Blackman’s and Blackwomen’s Guides. I know those two books by heart. Chock full of information that I never received at home or school.

  4. Ramses says:

    Mack the truth is they are never trying to get it….they are so far gone they think that Men want slimy ass women walking down the aisle to marry them….Feminism has really done it’s job on these females….the shit that I see on youtube and other sites of black women acting damn fools is the same shit I have seen my whole life no matter the arena (jobs, school, hood, etc.). Black women have always, for the most part, presented themselves in the most self-destructive manner. And what I’m learning is it’s a global thing too. I was watching this brother and he was talking about how even in south america the black women there want lighter skin babies. He said black men are more likely to get a better reception from the lighter skin sisters there and those who are considered white than the darker ones. I have always had an affinity for darker brown skin women but these chicks have serious issues. I remember seeing a black chick with her daughter on the train years ago, with her friend rubbing this white boys hair telling him he has good hair. Right in front of her daughter!!!! It’s not white folks, or the media that teaches black women to hate themselves: it’s them!!!! Now the first man black women are trying t run too are white men now they see black men have started waking up and seeking women elsewhere. It let’s you know how secretly they have always wanted them and have sometimes been fucking with them anyway. Watch clip. This hoe actually had the nerve to say black men have no class and she’s a porn star!!!! @Mack these hoes had a problem with you saying extra average but here’s proof of what you said being true. This bitch actually believes she deserves to have a White Man take her to a five star restaurant!!! That’s how a lot of black hoes think. All these hoes look for in men are free meals so they can continue to blow up like chunky monkeys and then call themselves “superthick.” We need to call black women what they have become: fat and slutty. I have dated black chicks who fucked with white boys and all of them have been crazy. Wouldn’t ever be with a black woman who messed with them. Not in this day and age and never. Black women are not trying to get with other races of the world, these hoes are writing books on how to get with a white man because they believe he is the epitome of the best. Look at this shit these hoes perpetrate gladly But we are the problem. Black women have been the main instigators of self-hate in the black community. Either you too light or to dark or your butt to big or you got nappy hair etc. Not saying men don’t do it but a lot of men have been raised solely by black women and the state. So if your mother was a self-hating woman, for your first 18 years of your life, whether male or female, you had someone teaching you how to hate yourself. Damn now I see why my success with black women has been nil. Not because I’m not good, but because she feels like she’s no good because she was raised to think that way. I remember when I used to encourage black women to go natural and they would say “but my hair nappy.” And I would ask them “how do you know?” Most black women who have permed their hair have never even seen their hair natural. Some black women have grown their hair out naturally to see they actually have beautiful hair. Yes black women. This dark brother has encouraged black women to be natural. But when the white man is your master, then you will never submit to the black man. Pure and simple. You can’t serve two masters. The only reason why black women need relationship experts teaching them how to get men is because they have stopped being traditional women. If you stopped being so masculine you could be successful. You got to read a book by steve harvey to understand men? Why your mama can’t teach you how to understand men? Oh because her dumb ass couldn’t understand them either because she was too busy rebelling against their authority. if you got too read a self-help book by steve harvey to understand men, then you will never get them. Some of you women need to pick up some stuff on Sharazid Ali or look at some of her stuff on youtube. Says the same things I say and she’s a black woman.

  5. Mack says:

    @ Common Sense: And I know numerous women who CAN find black men to date…and marry. They just represent a small minority of sisters who actually are worth marrying! The rest have so much baggage, they’re impossible to even take seriously.

    While you’re asking for opinions and all, try asking some of these brothers why they’re not marrying these so-called eligible sisters. All you have to do is ask us: we’ll gladly tell you why.

    But we know you won’t do that because you don’t want to hear the truth. Its much easier to live in your delusion of being the perfect little wife-to-be, waiting on those sorry dumb black men to get it together so they can marry you. Or waiting on him to stop chasing Becky. SMH. Some of you just don’t get it…

  6. Peter says:

    I totally agree with Common Sense!

  7. Ramses says:

    I agree Boyce….and for you ball tucking niggas shut the fuck up seriously. It’s niggas like you who exacerbate the problem. I’ve been around plenty of black women who carry this baggage Watkins refers to. And then expect you to carry the shit. Then you have some mama’s boy like harvey spinning and grinning to the bank when he had problems with his wife who called him out after their failed marriage. One thing I do appreciate about harvey is the fact he continues to try the marriage game which to me shows he actually believes in the institution. Outside of that, he needs to shut the hell up. Youtube is full of black women chastising other black women about their obnoxious, narcissistic, demonic, overly-sexed behavior. Their used to be atime when men wanted wholesome (virginesque) type women who were honorable. Now rappers marrying strippers!!! Black people have a right to criticize other black people who display coon ass behavior and if you think we don’t, you’re more than welcome going to the government to petition them for a new moniker to call yourselves this year (Negro, African-American, Nigger, Black, etc. just to name a few). ANd if you decide that your coon asses have your own group, then we would have no reason to judge you mofos cause you are not with us. Until then, we will put forth scathing critiques on your niggerish asses and trust me I won’t stop.
    Why don’t you speak out on these heifers who do dumb shit like these on these websites…who actually put their own niggerish behaviors on these websites…nobody is calling them to put it out there, they are more than willing to put it out on the web…grow some balls…damn black man what happened to your manhood?

  8. Common Sense says:

    Calling Steve a pimp is utterly uncalled for, and ridiculous. Black people constantly diss each other. No other group does this on a mass scale except black people. Instead of uplifting each other…we seem to love to bring people down. Steve’s book is only giving his opinion. I for one agree with what he said, and loved the movie. And for those of you that don’t think there’s a shortage of black males that seriously date black women, then you need to talk DIRECTLY to women all over the country. I know numerous women from the East to West to Midwest; and they all say the saame thing….they can’t find anyone to date.

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