(ThyBlackMan.com) I would imagine most of us are familiar with the idea that we are largely products of our environment. For good or bad, we are influenced by our experiences and mature to either continue in or deviate from what we have learned thus far. That’s a powerful realization.
We control our environments to a great degree, particularly in this country, during this time in American history. The five or six generations currently living in America have never seen a war fought on our soil. For the last 70 
years or so, we’ve seen incredible wealth and prosperity. America is ripe with opportunity even if those opportunities now seem to be diminishing. They exist nevertheless. So I’m speaking from the perspective of one who clearly sees the potential afforded to each person who reaches these shores and I say with emphatic conviction that most of us control our own environments.
Action and Inaction
As adults we determine where we will work, where we will live, how we live and with whom we choose to live. We choose what we eat for dinner. We choose if we’re going to be healthy or not. We choose to educate ourselves or not. We choose. Where our lives are concerned, we have the loudest voice and the weightiest vote. We come equipped with both pardon and veto power. And every action (or inaction) that we take points each of our lives in a particular direction.
I want us to always consider both our actions and our inactions. There are some things we draw into our lives with deliberate, conscious effort. Consider the effort you may have invested into attentively wooing your spouse, or the number of hours you may have spent writing papers and attending classes to earn your degree. You were in active pursuit of something that you valued. Now consider if you didn’t bother with higher education and haven’t done really much of anything to broaden your scope of knowledge. Consider the little pooch (or the big pooch) around your midsection due to poor diet and periods of relative physical inactivity. Your entire life is shaped first by your thought process and then by the decisions that you make which determine what action you’ll take. So be an active participant in your day to day life. Renew your thinking – feed both mind and spirit.
Your 5 People
Another important part of mastering your environment is simply being more discriminating about whom you allow into your space. I’ve heard it said that we are all the sum total of the 5 people with whom we spend the most time. Who are your 5? Don’t include your minor children because you shape them, but do include your spouse or significant other plus four more. Who gets your time? Who has access to your mind, space and emotions?
Let me first say, that some of us need to renew our thinking and adjust our actions before we go kicking people out of our lives. As you do, you will find that people will fall away of their own accord and there’s nothing wrong with that. Growth precipitates new relationships. Don’t feel obligated to chase relationships that no longer fit because you are afraid that people will call you different. If you’re becoming a better version of yourself, that’s the song you want to hear people sing, “She’s different,” or, “He’s different.” I recently saw a Facebook post that says, “Not everyone can afford the luxury of your friendship.” That’s true if you believe it to be so.
The process – and it is a process – of mastering your environment is essential to your personal and professional growth. So take an active role in making sure that you call the shots and that you are constantly striving to be your best self. And settling for nothing less.
Staff Writer; Sorilbran Buckner
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