(ThyBlackMan.com) Ten Things Every Black Father needs to do…
1) Tell your kids you love them every single day
Love not only makes the world go round, but every person needs to feel loved in order to have the balance necessary to be truly successful. If you love your kids, don’t just show it with your actions, say it with words. It will keep them from seeking love in all the wrong places.
2) Set an example for other fathers
The black male gets a bad rap for allegedly being an irresponsible father. We know that this stereotype is a misguided reflection of America’s historical hatred of the black male, but that doesn’t mean that we can’t encourage each other to do a better job. Demand that other brothers in your circle stand up as good fathers to their children, in spite of their circumstances. It can be tough to be a good parent with sky high 
unemployment and incarceration rates, but that doesn’t give you an excuse not to try. Those of us who ignore our children should be shamed into realizing how harmful such irresponsibility is to our community.
3) Always find a way to show respect to their mother
Even if you can’t stand the woman you had a child with, you should always give her as much respect as you possibly can. Kids don’t enjoy watching their parents fight, no matter whose fault it is. Also, in spite of your differences, you must always find a way to show appreciation toward the woman who gave life to your offspring.
4) Prepare them for the bullsh*t
We know that being black isn’t easy. You have to be twice as good to get half as much and life sometimes kicks you in the butt when you don’t deserve it. Prepare your kids for life as an African American, letting them know that they are going to have to be tough, smart and courageous to succeed in a world where the odds can be stacked against them. We all know that life isn’t fair, and it’s important to make sure your kids are prepared for the coming disparities.
5) Give them the courage to be different
Over the last 20 years, social problems and the mass marketing of gangster rap has put our kids into a time warp where the quest for success and education has been dwarfed by an insatiable appetite for partying, violence and sexual irresponsibility. Teach your kids to think for themselves and avoid the temptation of following the crowd and drinking from the cup of social poison that has been killing black youth left and right.
6) Start thinking about their education right now
The most valuable things your kids will ever have are your love and whatever education you give them. Get your kids started off on the path toward high academic achievement. Make investments in tutors, special programs and whatever it takes to ensure that your kids end up where they belong. Also, remember that the most valuable education they receive will not occur inside a classroom – give them a lesson on life every day during casual conversation.
7) Teach them to run their own business
Black people have the highest unemployment rates in America, and even our black president doesn’t seem to care. The truth is that we are the last hired and the first fired primarily because we don’t own any of the businesses that are doing all the hiring. Teach your kids how to get off the plantation and create something of their own. It’s hard to take a stand on important causes if you’ve committed yourself to economic slavery, so they need to be positioned for the chance for freedom. If you can’t teach them how to run their own business, sign them up for a class so they can learn the skill from someone else.
8) Teach them to live life with a purpose
Far too many of us are willing to bust our butts for a paycheck or consider our education to be a chance for us to do some meaningless job until we get old and die. Help your kids to find a purpose. With a community that is dying all around them, there are plenty of ways to spend their time doing something that is going to make a difference in the world, rather than allocating all of their energy toward becoming a one-dimensional corporate monkey.
9) Teach them the value of being a good parent
You don’t have to have a child in order to be a parent. Guiding children (whether or not they are your own) is one of the most important jobs in the African American community. Teach your kids the value of becoming good parents when they are older and also of importance of mentoring young people in the community.
10) Give them plenty of time
Even if you can provide all the bling in the world to your children, there’s no substitute for time. Spending time with your kids is the most important and fulfilling thing you can do, and you should always make time for meaningful communication and interaction. What might seem like a simple trip to the mall or a day out to eat ice cream will come to create the most impactful and formative memories in the life of your child. Don’t ever underestimate the depth of your impact.
Being a parent is the most important job in the world. Take this job seriously and create leaders for the next generation. With good love, guidance, education and courage, there’s nothing our kids can’t do.
Staff Writer; Dr. Boyce Watkins
Dr. Boyce Watkins is the founder of the Your Black World Coalition. For more information, please visit http://BoyceWatkins.com.