Connoisseurs Of Criticism.

by Staff October 1, 2015 5 Comments News Opinion Weekly Columns

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(ThyBlackMan.com) “Pay no attention to the man who criticizes unless he is doing something better than what he criticizes… Criticism is very cheap. It does not take an intelligent man; it does not take an abnormal mind; it does not take an intelligent mind to criticize. Even the fool can criticize, and generally it is the fool who criticizes.”

Marcus Garvey

As a youth playing sports I heard and received criticism that was quite damaging. These harsh statements did not come from immature youth but from supposedly mature adults whose words sting much harsher than slander from one’s peers. As I have matured growing in wisdom and knowledge of self, reflecting upon life’s experiences I realized the root of the unbalanced verbal onslaught void of encouragement. Who were the verbal bullets coming from? Unhappy people, void of achievement and life experience, crippled by fear and doubt. These adults were intimidated by an innocent youth who had a dream and vision. This lesson is still prevalent today when one hears unconstrained criticism of an individual whose only offense has been their ambition and drive.

People are so offended and intimidated by people who are not scared of failure, with the courage to try new things, or have achieved some success in their endeavors. These sideline critics analyze every single thing everyone should be doing or failed to do. Failing to ever put the same effort into their own lives which is usually crippled by fear, doubt, and disappointment.

In modern language, connoisseurs of criticism are referred to as “haters” but they truly are haters of themselves. They hate the characteristics and courage they see in you that they wish they had. Please do not let the negative words of others disrupt you from giving your all on whatever endeavor you may try.

For all those who put down instead of building up, please refrain from your destructive behavior. Keep your misery to yourself. The world has enough negative energy and it would be beneficial if you did not add yours. We as black people are chronic criticizers, without ever providing any information that could improve the person’s situation. What irresponsible use of the powerful tool of speech.

We see them congregated in corners, mocking their peers for their weight problem while they themselves are on medication, because of their own inability to manage their own weight.

I have learned to refrain from criticizing due to the negative energy it creates and instead focus on the more uplifting behavior of encouragement. If I am exposed to someone who is more knowledgeable, experienced, and prosperous in a particular area I humble myself, seeing what I can learn from their expertise and, applying their knowledge to my own development. I have found this action most beneficial to my energy source and my own growth. You will be surprised how open people will be to share information with you if you approach someone with a humbled spirit.

For all those who have been hurt by the crushing words of critics please remember the words of Marcus Garvey, “Pay no attention to the man who criticizes unless he is doing something better than what he criticizes.” Humble yourself and see if the criticism is true, then ask for means to improve. If it is mere empty speech, forgive the transgressor and continue on your journey.

“Kind words and good emanation frequency

Proven most beneficially…”

Midnite

Staff Writer; Linton Hinds Jr.

Official website; http://Livity.info/

5 Comments

DCARTER910 says:

October 3, 2015 at 9:20 pm

@Marque,

I did read your article about Black Egos, and well…you still miss my point. The problem I see with any black movement is that blacks tend to try to move in too many directions at once, never fully developing and accomplishing the goals of any specific movement (Harlem Renaissance, Civil Rights, Black Panthers Movement, etc etc). What I am trying to tell you, is that no black person standing in an unemployment line with kids to feed and at the same time watching the President shove gay rights down the world’s throat (including the Pope), but who does little to nothing for blacks, want to hear how the color “black” has been mis-categorized.

P.S. The color black has been mis-categorized since the beginning of human history when man light fires to keep the scary things in the darkness away AND most East Africans to this day are very dark near black (some even black). So white imperialist had no other vocabulary terms to call them except black.

P.S.2. Asians were called yellow people (some are, I know from my personal travels) and that was considered an inferior trait but not that China is the economic power house of the world Europeans and Americans fear and respect them. So maybe it isnt the color but that the people of our color must start doing things that demand respect, like the Asians, including Indians (India) and some Arab countries. Then despite our color, our wealth and achievements will demand their respect.

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Marque Anthony says:

October 3, 2015 at 3:38 am

Check out my article on this site entitled “Black” Egos and let me know what you think

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DCARTER910 says:

October 2, 2015 at 3:30 pm

@Marque,

I do not always agree with you but when I do, it is in sincerity! As such, great cross examination of the author’s initial point.

P.S. Enough of the black isnt black so dont be called black because your not black your another color that isnt black unless you are really that dark then you are really black because black is beautiful except unless you are not black…crap! 50% of our people are out of work, we do not have time for this crap. You do not mow the grass when there is a C5 Hurricane on the way, nor do you wash the dishes when the house is on fire. Good topic, but more pressing issues at hand in my opinion.

@Linton,

Great topic that will hopefully lead to greater conversations.

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hoodgirl says:

October 2, 2015 at 7:40 am

With Marque Anthony’s position noted, I simply LOVE this Article!

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Marque Anthony says:

October 1, 2015 at 3:46 pm

I disagree with this article and your connotative description of criticism. Constructive criticism is a good thing, especially when coupled with good intent and pure motives. I am a family and relationship counselor, mediator and life coach. My opinions are valued and sought after because even my criticisms are all about taking the person higher and making him or her stronger and better than ever before – based on their potential, not just my idea.

The fact is that much of the African American community is in denial and does not like to be corrected. This is a combination of ego on one side of the coin and inferiority complexes on the other. These are the facts.

As for the issue of wisdom, the Bible says a wise man seeks instruction or correction but a fool despises it. I tend to believe the Bible more than the author of this article who seems to have a problem with criticism.

Criticism can be constructive or destructive. It can also be the right thing said in the wrong way or at the wrong time. So there are many facts to this issue. Thus it is inaccurate for you to place all of them in one basket.

Constructive Criticism can simply be pointing out what is wrong, what needs to be corrected and what can be done to correct the matter. In such case, each of us can clearly do that with each other without having to be perfect ourselves.

People who can take constructive criticism are people who realize they do not know everything, thus I speak of myself first and foremost. Accepting criticism is recognizing that iron sharpens iron, and that when iron clashes with iron, sparks fly but those sparks are necessary for both pieces of iron to become stronger and molded.

Accepting constructive criticism is acknowledging that we cannot do everything nor know everything alone. It is also accepting that we have, as the Bible says, accountability to one another. That is part of our problem in the AA community, too many of our people not realizing we are all connected and thus accountable to each other. Wake up author.

Criticism itself only creates negative energy when one of four things happens.
1. The person gets offended based on ego or exposure of his mistakes.
2. The criticism is destructive, not constructive.
3. The criticism is delivered in the wrong way.
4. The criticism is delivered at the wrong time (or place).

Clearly what a daughter did not do to help her mother should not be spoken at the funeral. But it should be dealt with later. Those who cannot or will not accept constructive criticism are those who want to stick their heads in the sand and stay on the level where they are. But there is no growth, no wisdom and no maturity in doing that. And because life itself is progressive, if you stay stuck or stand still, it will pass you by.

A wise person seeks constructive criticism and uses it to make himself stronger and better or rise higher in every area possible. Herein is wisdom. And unless a person knows everything, he or she should learn to accept constructive criticism.

I ask for constructive criticism in my practice as a counselor and in my seminars. I count on it because feedback and evaluation from those people you speak to is essential to know if they are receiving the message. CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM IS ABSOLUTELY NECESSARY AND OUR PEOPLE WOULD BE WISE TO LEARN THIS.

&

Criticism does not always mean you were wrong. Criticism can also represent the views of other people about how your message came across to them. You and I need to know that if we are going to create messages that will be well received.

&

Notice that even in your quote, Garvey in fact says pay attention to the man who is doing something better. Thus some forms of criticism should be listened to, learned from and acknowledged.

And even if someone is not doing something better, that does not mean he/she cannot recognize and share something you need to know. If we are only going to accept criticism from people who are doing something better, what happens when thee one who is not can still tell you something you need to hear and that will help you?

&

By the way, thinking we are a color that we are not (black is the color of your car tires, not your skin), given to us by an oppressor who is not the color he says he is (white is the color of notebook paper, not Caucasians) then accepting that color as fact (when it is not), allowing ourselves to be defined by someone else and accepting all the negatives deliberately attached to the lie are all clear signs that we have been brainwashed.

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