(ThyBlackMan.com) So everyone is talking about the situation that occurred between the Brother that was driving the bus and the Sister that was a passenger, and I wanted to give my thoughts on the matter. I posted the link on both of my Facebook pages and I must say, the amount of deflection that was exhibited by some of the women that commented was almost unbelievable.
When I watched the video, my initial thoughts were just how aggressive she was towards the Brother and I thought his reaction was just. This is what happens when you become the aggressor regardless if you are male or female. In my house I had to jam my oldest daughter up because she hit her brother and said you can’t hit me back because I am girl. I quickly corrected her and told her that doesn’t give you or any other female who thinks like that a pass. You place your hands on a man, be prepared for the possibility that he might place his hands on you.
This was one of the comments left on my personal Facebook page; “He’s a BYTCH! I guess men can hit girls/women — if warranted. “This type of response is typical for those that wallow in deflection. This wasn’t a random incident where he just walked up to the Sister and punched her, if it was then to lay blame on him would be valid. However this is a man REACTING to someone’s actions. So he’s a bytch for responding to the female that hit him? What does her actions make HER? As women we are so quick to cosign, enable and pass out “victim” cards for one another. That’s not the case with me; I keep a deck of “accountability cards” in my pocket. When you’re wrong, you’re wrong. Women wanted to talk about the effect (him hitting her) but not about the cause; her INITIAL violation of him.
Look at the language that was used. We are so quick to call Black Men out of their names, just totally disrespectful, but remain mute on the disrespectful Black Woman that was the catalyst of the situation. As women we are VERY hypocritical, we want the errors of men center stage with a bright spotlight, but when the light is on our madness, we are like Gizmo, yelling “Bright Light, Bright Light” as we make our way to the darkness that houses deflection, where we think our flaws, short comings, faults and superior attitudes are safe.
So many Sisters wanted him to handle it differently, but all of this could have been avoided if SHE would have handled herself differently in the FIRST place.
It also comes down to trying to test a Brother’s manhood. Because of the emasculation and effeminization of the Black Man, Black Women have become more masculine in their thinking, which is reflected in their actions. Because we have been placed on this “make shift throne” we have convinced ourselves that we really do rule over men, causing us to treat and speak to them any type of way. So obviously she felt like she could “punk” him. What has she witnessed that made her think that was OK? Has she done something like this before and got away with it? Most destructive behavior is learned behavior. We live in a society where women play the victim and in some cases are enabled to pull these kinds of stunts.
I also noticed comments like “he didn’t have to do her like that” or that his actions weren’t “justified.” This is the thing, if you run up on me, you can’t dictate my reaction. You touch me and I have the right to kill you. She should be happy she’s still breathing. If that was my daughter I would beat her ass and make her go apologize. Don’t play those big girl games if you’re not ready for big girl consequences.
I will tell you just like I tell my son, anyone puts their hands on you, male or female, you have the right to body bag them. Many thought his reaction wasn’t “fair”. Again we want Black Men to just take our shyt right? Everyone has a breaking point, how much disrespect could you honestly tolerate before you retaliate? She should consider getting chin checked as mercy. This was a lesson that she had to learn the hard way.
His actions weren’t fair? Really? Why is it that we always deflect back to him or men in general? What about HER actions? Were they fair? Was she justified? If you slap me and a few days later you find yourself waking up in the hospital you can’t say that’s not fair I just slapped her. You will not violate me by putting your hands on me and think you can dictate my reaction to YOU putting your hands on ME. That’s not how it works.
This incident is a viral billboard to those women who become physically aggressive towards men, and try to use “you can’t hit me because I am a woman” shield. Like the Brother who was driving the bus said “”She want to be a man, I’m gonna treat you like a man.” Please don’t misconstrue or mistake my stance as consignment on domestic violence regarding women. The two are NOT related. For every action there is a consequence and in this case, the consequence was a smooth uppercut.
[youtube dabyo-eiAG0]
The longer version of the hoodrat/bus driver incident. You can hear where the chick threatens to spit on the bus driver before she actually does it:http://www.worldstarhiphop.com/videos/video.php?v=wshhzCVM2oOs7f35xwUa
Peace Moor (Mike) appreciate the feedback. Let’s be clear. Black men did try to stand up during slavery (Denmark Vescey, Gabriel Prosser, Nat Turner, etc). This is a common misconception in our community. That the Black Man didn’t fight and it was only Harriet Tubman, and Angela Davis, and Oprah Winfrey who are defending black people. Let me give you some names of brothers who have fought through slavery to free their people up until recent times: Marcus Garvey (Universal Negro Improvement Association which had over 2 1/2 million member at its height without modern forms of communication). Booker T Washington who helped form Tuskegee Institute which not only focused on teaching black people skills, but also teaching them religious/moral values as well in their curriculum. Nation of Islam who were about self-reliance and establishing businesses. Dr Malachi Z York Head of Nuwabian Nation who actually built a pyramid in georgia and was also teaching his people about their true nationality. Now I give these few examples who because we are under this illusion that there have been no black women defending their people, sometimes even being killed by their own people in the process. To speak to your point about not being supported by black women in terms of business, I think that’s very important to expand on. I have noticed over the years that most black women don’t respect black men don’t support who own and run businesses. I heard plenty of black men who say the same thing you said and this is my theory: black women think that running businesses is strictly forbidden to black men and only meant for white men. It sounds silly but a black female i know said she noticed the same thing over the years. So there is something there to my theory. I do a lot of reading on trusts, tax code, investment banking, etc and it is my ultimate goal to have my own chain of banks in the future and when i speak business to most black women they shut down. I knew cats who were trying to show black women clean their credit and get off of section-8 and these chicks refused to take their guidance and chose to stay on the welfare! lol at the end of the day business is the science of life itself because every creature of the planet takes from the earth what it needs to survive and thrive. The black man was the first man to circumnavigate the globe way before the caucasoid male. Matter fact it’s the interaction of the European male with the Moors which allowed him to get the instruments necessary (compass) to travel the high seas in order to conduct commerce. If black men are not trying to learn about stocks, and bonds, trusts, non-profits, asset protection,etc, then he will continue to be in the position he finds himself in. Unlike black women, we don’t have the “luxury” to lean on white men to eat, and nor should we. Kudos to you on your business endeavors. Matter fact what kind of business are you in, maybe in the future i might be willing to invest in (majesticlioninfinity@gmail.com)
Yes all races have negative women. But it seems to me that the majority of black women are negative and have the neck popping attitude towards the black man.
Mike Williams,
It takes all kinds of people to make a world that’s why a negative attitude is not just found in black women. Congrats on your business success but in terms of a relationship, men and women must have a match and we are definitely what we attract. If you enjoy a hot meal prepared by your woman then get with a woman that enjoys preparing a hot meal for her man. As for a negative attitude, anyone who finds this to be attractive is not playing with a full deck.
@ Ramses
Wow you should have had an article on this site instead of just commenting. That was a loooong comment. I can say this when I was starting my businesses, I dated black women and all I got from them was “oh thats not going to work” and all kinds of negative comments. My white women friends had nothing but encouragement. The encouragement from the white women is what kept me going. Needles to say my businesses are successful today. I’m not sure where all the black woman attitude came from through the generations. My theory is they are subconsciously mad at black men because we couldn’t or wouldn’t stand up to the white man way back in slavery times. Im thinking thats where all the discouragement and negative attitude from black women came from when a black man tries to do something. Thats just my theory anyway. Black women need to realize its not all about the white woman skin color. It’s more about all that damn black woman attitude. Heres a tip to black women: Fix your man a nice plate of food, encourage him and shut the hell up!!! It will do wonders for your current relationship and help you snag a good black man.
Peace Moor (Mack) appreciate the feedback on that…I used to grill black men for being weak because I was naive to think that black women were on our side as a counterpart but even the rift between cornel west and Melissa harris perry signifies the split that exists in the community…black women have left the group behind to fight the feminist battle allegedly…however let’s tease that out….black women are nastier to each other than they are to their men and they are nasty to us so is she really fighting for women’s rights? Hell no….she’s not out here fighting on behalf of sisters as a collective…she’s fighting for the opportunity to take the white woman’s place next to the caucasian male. my ex before i broke up with her a few years back gave me a lot of insight into the black woman’s psyche…number one black women have a tremendous, almost demonic-level of low self-esteem that we don’t recognize as men. whenever you see women who go out their way to be arrogant towards you then something’s amiss. But she said two things that will forever stand out to me matter fact three. 1st, i asked her that since black women complain about black men so much and we’re worth nothing, then why do you’ll get so mad when we get with white women or foreign women? she said “well it’s like we really don’t want you’ll but, we don’t want you’ll to go anywhere else and be happy. Now that’s sickness if i ever saw it. Number two, she was reading a blog on essence and she let me read a message a light-skinned girl wrote. the girl said her grandmother said “a black man and a white woman together isn’t nothing, but a black woman and a white man together can rule the world.” Marinate on that for one second. Her grandmother said this. Question you have to ask yourself is what information did this granny have to convince that this was true? Number 3, I said to her “black women are so hateful, that if they were driving in a car, and they were mad at their male counterpart, they are so vindictive that they would purposely crash the car, even if it meant they would gt a broke leg, just to hurt that black man on purpose.” You know what she said? She didn’t even take long either. She said “you know what i totally agree with you. i don’t disagree at all” after about 5 seconds of thought. The so-called black man is a naive creature. He doesn’t understand the world when used to be the master of the seas. You don’t try to change the women where you are or hell the men where you are once they take a turn for the worse. It’s easier for you as a Man to find fertile soil in the world who not only much more beautiful and inside and out, but who requires less of you than women in the western hemisphere who can’t even remotely come close to an of these women. You don’t want your women to fear you for her to respect you and the only men who i’ve seen consistently get respect from black men are pimps because they put a fear of God in their behinds behind their money. However, what a Man seeks from a woman is reverence. Because when a woman reveres you, she would never even think about doing something towards you that would denigrate your sense of manhood. A black female friend of mine said to that one thing she noticed about white women she said that they do know how to make their men feel like men. So when sisters were excoriating black men for leaving them fro white women because they valued the white woman because of her white skin, they were misleading. When the brother found out what it felt like to be honored, it added to his desire to want to produce even more. A chick i dealt with in 2001 she said when a woman says she doesn’t need a man, she automatically kills a man’s drive to want to do for her. Black women have killed the desire for black men to waqnt to do for them and even though you got some brothers out here who are willing to take one for the team and be miserable with the hopes of trying to be with them, if you asked them in private, honestly how they felt about them, they would probably say they hate them, they only suppressed it because they don’t want to come off as bitter and resentful, another insult that does not take into account what black women have taken them through and makes men be unwilling to share their feelings, ultimately leading to men continuously getting their asses whipped…Black men in america is at a crossroad: will he continue to take abuse from the black woman on behalf of some caucasian males or will he find more suitable soil to put his seeds in on the global stage? And for those who think i hate black women it’s not that at all…there are plenty of melanated sisters in brazil and quite frankly i’m not racist if a brother meets a european and falls in love, based on the abuse he has taken in north america, then i say go for it. Because remember, black women and white men have always had interracial connections. We were the ones who were prevented from dealing with caucasian women by law and force in years past. But Cleopatra was definitely trying to get with marc anthony and julius caesar and this was when were in power as a people for people who try to reduce the black woman’s behavior as product of slavery, something i totally disagree with. We are honored globally and can get women from any lands in the world. use your power brothers if they don’t value marriage, then go find a woman who does…the scripture even says blessed is the man that findeth a wife…it never says you will necessarily find her in the land in which you were born. We go back and forth on this black people thing when you have one half of the group (black women) for the most part, who don’t want to be black. Blond hair, blue eyes, fake eyelashes, skin lightening creams, etc. A chick i dealt with had reall wavy hair when it got wet like she was dominican or something and was dark skin extremely beautiful. I asked her since you a proud black woman i said would you trade your wavy hair for some rough and nappy hair….she thoughtt about for a quick second and then said nah laughingly and that’s when i knew then that that black crap was something that was fake..it tricked the black man…because while the black was thinking group, his woman was thinking individually… i actually found out that the fakest black women out here are the natural, conscious, erykah badu types. Erykah badu sung all those songs only to turn out to be a conscious ho! Lauryn Hill was the last hope for black women she tried to warn sistas back then and then black women said forget that i wanna be beyonce, nicki minaj, rihanna. I’m done..My friend said in 2007 by the time black women realize they have lost us, it will be too late. Yeah they will get with these weak dudes and pro-create but in terms of keeping the strong brothers who are actually family-oriented and are looking for stability, they have lost their grip on them…hell tiger woods dad got him a korean woman fighting in korea and this was in the fifties. and i bet you black women used to probably disrespect him and call him corny cause he played golf, but when they saw those dollars all of sudden wanted him to be black…black women only want a black man to be black when it’s convenient for her pockets…you have women in their 30’s, still living with their parents in other countries and still virgins!!! bruh by the time these girls reach 18 they are ran through in the state real talk..this is not harsh it’s truth…i would never want my son if i had one date a black woman from the united states…seriously based on what she’s shown me…and if brothers were honest with themselves they would have same thing…you got to learn how to separate your love for your mother from the behavior of black women in general and sometimes even mothers are like the average chick nowadays….women in their 40’s and 50’s talking about their favorite rapper is TI or Drake…silly for real i like my hip hop like the next man but women go put on some stephanie mills, sade, anita baker…f….ing drake! sill bruh
@ Ramses:
“You go to church because church is another club as far as i’m concerned especially the way you see women dressed in their nowadays, but you don’t know how to treat a man? Well open up your Bible! Duh! It teaches you basic things that will help you be successful with your mate. College-educated women and scriptures, for the most part don’t go together. Booker T Washington was lamenting black women being educated in the late 1800?s but not knowing how to meet the demands of the family on a basic level. The Black woman, in a general sense, is either corporate or a welfare recipient, but as a general consensus is not familial. She is extremely selfish, she has sold out her family unit for the opportunity to work next to her master (and the white man is her master whether black men want to acknowledge it or not) and be close to the master’s master bedroom (his corporate structure is an extension of his bedroom). ”
This quoted paragraph is GOLDEN! Your whole post was, but this is what sisters by and large need to listen to and take heed to, as much as they hate to hear the solid truth.
Bravo my brother, bravo…
I have watched this over and over again and it resonates on so many levels. Where do i begin? For over 50 years, black women have chosen the welfare system over listening to their men and following his guidance. Black Feminism has legislated the Man out of the home so long that women and kids nowadays, in general, don’t respect Black Men (Moors). I’ve had black women tell me they would kick my ass in public to my face. Years ago my own sister pulled a knife on me. I say that to say this: as a collective, black women suck. I live in Atlanta, GA aka Babylon. And I can honestly say that I have never seen a group of women (black women) so trashy. And please don’t be one of those black women apologists either who tries to compare other women to black women in order to deflect accountability for their own actions. My grandmother and I discuss black women and black people in general ll the time and my granny says that she has women in their 40’s asking her to teach them how to be a lady! What! Your mother teaches you how to be a Woman and when you see a young woman act like that it’s clear her mama (more and likely a baby mama) did a poor poor job.
What mother with any sense of decency would defend their child on that level? You know black people’s problems stem from the fact that their loyalty to each other is based on racial dynamics instead of cultural values. For instance based on my cultural values I have more in common with people in south america, middle east, africa, southeast asia, and most european countries. This is because I value family structure and order, something that most black women don’t respect, no matter what region of the country they live in. You have women in atlanta who go to the strip club more than men and then have the nerve to clap and catch the holy ghost in church! As a man i have never been in a strip club and you mean to tell me there are more women in the club than men according to a friend of mine who was there recently.
There is a whole generation of daughters and mothers who are in essence whores and whores are known to be unruly. Even the scripture instructs Man in Leviticus 21:7 “Man do not wife a whore.” The average black woman is not marriage material because of their willingness to act in this manner and I’m not blaming this stuff on white people all the time because my great grandparents, who i knew, grew up in eras where our people were hung and they had a family standard that caused black people in their community to consider them uppity! Lol. Most black people in the US consider themselves Christian and you hear so many women out here once they’re past the prime of their life (18-25) in their 30’s and 40’s complaining about their aren’t any good men to marry. What? Please. You have women who go to church every sunday and then turn around and ask men like myself what do men want and how do you treat men? Really!
You go to church because church is another club as far as i’m concerned especially the way you see women dressed in their nowadays, but you don’t know how to treat a man? Well open up your Bible! Duh! It teaches you basic things that will help you be successful with your mate. College-educated women and scriptures, for the most part don’t go together. Booker T Washington was lamenting black women being educated in the late 1800’s but not knowing how to meet the demands of the family on a basic level. The Black woman, in a general sense, is either corporate or a welfare recipient, but as a general consensus is not familial. She is extremely selfish, she has sold out her family unit for the opportunity to work next to her master (and the white man is her master whether black men want to acknowledge it or not) and be close to the master’s master bedroom (his corporate structure is an extension of his bedroom).
How many black women do you hear out here saying they want to be homemakers? How many do you hear saying they want to help raise a family? Most of them are focused on one thing and one thing only: degrees. They think that once they get a degree they don’t need the black man or family anymore. A lot of these women who are struggling now did well when Clinton was in office and you couldn’t tell them a damn thing. Now they’re in debt, losing houses, and what’s more insulting are coming back to their men demanding that we marry them and take care of them! How dare you’ll! Like pastor Manning says you have no honor. You run the streets, you have sex with your pastors of your congregations, you have no respect for the rule of law (God’s law which is natural law), you’re marrying each other, you took the man out the home willingly and now your sons are either weak or gay, your daughters in their teenage years are whores.
I watched a story on 11 alive news in Atlanta and it said that this city is a major hub for child sexploitation. A girl said whe was pimped from the age of 11 to seventeen. The black man didn’t create this madness: the black woman did because she is more than happy to either scrub her master’s floors, or be a whore in the street, or both. Booker T Washington had religious and moral training at Tuskegee to teach black people values to make them better family members. Our women don’t value anything but materialism and welfare. And what’s sad because I’m a Moor, when people see this tape they think that I’m with these clowns just because we share melanin. You’ll must be crazy. Black people are being destroyed and for good reason because unfortunately you have to many men unwilling to go in these black women mouth and put them back in their place or maybe their place is to be out of place.
I watched a documentary the other day called “frustrated” and it talks about Black Men moving and taking trips to Brazil looking for wives. Black women have forced their Men to look elsewhere for wives because as a collective they don’t fit the bill. This is truth. I grew up in a house with a grandfather and grandmother who were great. My dad raised me. So I respect men and you don’t as women disrespect your men like that and now the world sees this and thinks its ok to disrespect black men. In 2001 black women had me spitting in their face because I was disgusted with them then and things have gotten dramatically worse with this beyonce, lady gaga, rihanna, whore complex that’s celebrated out here. This chick is a nibidy on all levels and you don’t defend nobodies.
Nature has a way of weeding out nobodies in the gene pool and I have no problem with that. There are reports that this girl has been shot and stabbed in the past. Chick like this have come into people’s families and ruined families based on their mentality. When I see a coon like this make a fool out of herself like this it doesn’t reflect on me because me and this braud are not on the same side at all. I believe in law and order and when you allow a woman to be as unruly as the black women is, then this is what happens. Black people you did it to yourself. Your woman has a foul stench about her. i used to think black men who dated outside of the ‘race’ were weak and traitors when I was on that pro-black back-to-africa stance i had in college. But the one thing i notices about brothers who marry foreign women, especially when they’re not black women, is that they seem to really be happy and enjoying life and their families. If I would have chosen values over racial pride, a big mistake, i would have never dealt with black women.
To be honest the only reason i was able to deal with them over the years was actually lowering my standards. Majority of black women i have come across my life could not even come close to meeting my standards which was me being merciful. My problems with black women only came when i tried to love them and that’s sad to say. the most hateful, miserable group of people on the planet are not black people, but black women. The only person I’ve seen who has power over them and can control them is white men. He knows something we don’t because she has been rebelling against the black man since ancient times but she bows down to the caucasian. But she’s his problem not the black man.
The 20th century is filled with black men who literally put their lives on the line for her and he is rewarded by having this demon spit in his face? When he’s just trying to make an honest living. When that brother threw that punch he threw a punch for all us brothers who have had to bite their tongue and clench their fists wanting so badly to knock the soul out of them for disrespecting them just as the girl disrespected the driver. i don’t gloss over the black woman’s behavior anymore. I expose it and I don’t give a damn how many degrees you wirters on this forum have this comes down to Man law…you don’t ever disrespect a man like that and then to make it worse she put every person’s life on that bus in jeopardy because the guy was driving while she was up in house face. what if the bus crashed and people were killed any of you sill females think about that when you defended this chick?
This proves feminism is a joke because if women are so equal were to men, then why is there any debate on this topic? Why is her gender the topic whether he was right or wrong in hitting her? If it was a man would we be having this discussion? No we would be laughing saying he got what he deserved and that black men need to carry themselves in a better way. We whip kids behind when they get out of line and they are much more defenseless against adults, but a female is off limits when she does something like this. Let a daughter of mine do something like this. I would disown her literally. i would put her out my family. That’s how much I support Men being respected. Period
Great article sista!!! This story speaks to what i have shared before. We shifted to a paradigm that emphasizes limitless accountability for men while extending them little compassiin, it is ruthless and we communicate messages of respect but show our men no love.. for women we emohasize limitless compassion while extending them little accountability, it is infantilizing and it is loving our women but not respecting them when we as women are held to a different lvel of accountability or when the indefensible is defended by society.. ive said it and will say it again..a society that despises its men run the risk of creating despicable men!
@ Terrence Amen
Oh here you go with the black panther thinking again!!! All races hit one another. Don’t try to make it into a black people dont love black people thing!!!
This is why all guys think this is funny. Most guys will not hit a woman no matter what. We all want to hit a woman when she is running her damn mouth especially right in a man’s face but we dont. So we enjoy seeing that. Its like he was hitting a woman for all of us. Not to mention the uppercut was vicious!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
@ Greg Brown
You said he would have never hit a white woman like that. Well guess what…a white woman wouldnt have been talking all that smack. Now, I think he should’ve done something back but that uppercut was a little overboard.
This woman hit and spit on him but HE’s the punk? He’s the “b”. My God, this is ridiculous. Spitting on a person is one of the MOST disrespectful things you can do. The level of simps and deflection is sickening. I’ve never seen such an unwarranted defense of wrong in my life. I got an email saying that Black Men are cowards and won’t protect our communities. It’s not so much that Black Men are cowards as it is that they don’t have the desire to protect a bunch of rebels! We talk all that talk about Brothers taking back our communities, but would probably look at them sideways, curse them out, when they do. It is amazing that people would use this incident, to stress how the Black Woman is not protected, when the Black Woman in the incident was the aggressor! Her actions and attitude didn’t invoke a man’s protection. What man wants to risk his life over a foolish woman? All that sounds good, as you write on the site, but be honest. If you see a woman disrespecting another man, what the hell would stop her from disrespecting YOU, if you stepped in?
This is a society that has effeminized the males to the extent that we would watch a female verbally and physically abuse a male, the same society that chastise a male for verbally and physically abuse a female…this present society will watch a female hit a male AND not do anything UNTIL HE hit her back….then those watch will all of a sudden beat HIM up physically and verbally. THAT is the sign of a punk. And any males that would ignore the hypocrisy in that is not only a punk, he is apussy and a bitch. There is a clear distinction between being a male and being a man. Further more all this shit about restraint is uttered by people who have never been in a fight before and I am not talking about pillow fight.
As for the females, who FOCUS on the end, but not the beginning…it is a lie, you CANNOT have your cake and eat it too. Not in the context to which reality says it is. All this shit about he is a man, he is stronger, bullshit, negates the fact that each of you will not be talking the same shit if you were at the receiving end of her attacks…..unless YOU are the punk. Another name for turning the other cheek.
If she would have hit him then it would have been somewhat justified. But I think he’s a coward, if she would have been a he, and as big as him, the outcome would have been differently. He’s a punk!
with all due respect sister i could not disagree with your position more. the level of force he used in retaliation/reaction to the 25 yr old woman’s stimuli was extremely overly excessive. yes i am quick to call any man who hits a woman with a closed fist out of his name especially if he or his family is not in life or death danger because of the actions of a female. most importantly i’ll call any man out of his name who after uppercutting a female with all his might starts pulling her hair after she got up and demanded more.
as men we are blessed with strength and a heavier bone dexterity than woman which makes hand to hand inter gender combat a naturally unfair endeavor.
this is why our parents and the rules of organized society frowns upon the activity. granted the woman was extremely excessive for spitting on another human being. she deserved to be removed from the bus with great immediacy, the cops called on her, prosecution to the fullest extent, a thorough and proper ass whupping from a female in the man’s life and any form of open handed blow but the closed fist to the face of a woman is the embarrassment and great example of the failure of the village not the “ghetto” or “ratchet” appearance and behavior of the female victim.
First, Nojima, i respect the points you have brought up. i understand that the young female was totally wrong. i can understand his reactions. the bigger problem is that in today’s culture the respect between black men and woman has deterioated. the word bitch, hoe, and goldigger etc. are used too the much by us when addressing our women. black women are no longer looked upon as african queens. a black man is looked upon as a sucker if he works while she stays home with the kids.black women are equally guilty. they want to talk disrespectful and put unobtainable economic demands upon a brother. i live in Harlem and have been in situations with women that could have ended much worse than the situation on the bus. it takes alot to show restraint and i can understand a man losing it after being spat on.that is why it is good for us to discuss these situations and maybe help to us have better respect for one another
Peace to all! To my Brothers Mack and Sankofa, it’s always nice to “see” my Brothers
So I see folks have reached into their tool box and have pulled out their handy dandy deflection drill as usual. I am not going to play what if, I am going to play what DID. What DID happen is that a grown Black Woman, started disrespecting a grown Black Man. What DID happen is that a grown woman starting calling a grown Black Man out of his name FIRST. What did happen is that a grown Black Woman spit on a grown Black Man. I mean what else did you want the Brother to take? I mean you can “say” that you would be calm if you want to, but it is always easy to say what you would do in a situation you haven’t been in. For all those who feel like Black Women should be protected, what did this woman do that warrants protection? What did she do that would have motivated the men on the bus to jump in and defend her? Not a damn thing! Why would any other man tried to defend her, when she is already disrespectful to the man that she is talking to? Protection is automatically given it is EARNED. Nothing about this Sister screamed “protect me”.
So you say HIS response wasn’t justified? Was SHE justified at all? No she wasn’t. Like I stated in my article, you don’t have the right to control someone REACTING to your INITIAL ACTIONS. To those that are trying to flip this to a “woman beater” situation you are really reaching. This is not a case where she was randomly attacked and she was pleading for her life and she was just getting beat down, this is a case where a woman made the conscious decision to be the aggressor, and the brother was JUST in his reaction. I mean did some of you even watch the video? But I forget about that deflection tunnel vision, that blocks out all that the woman does, apparently you just see the uppercut and nothing else.
This case is so clear,but only to those whose vision isn’t distorted by deflection.
HE WOULD NEVER HAD DONE THAT TO A WHITE WOMAN. SECOND, UNLESS ITS LAILA ALI, A REAL MAN WOULD SUBDUE WITHOUT HAVING TO PUNCH HER LIKE THAT. TO SHOW THE VIDEO OF A BLACK WOMAN BEING PUNCHED THEN SHOWING A SCENE FROM FRIDAY MAKES ME COMPARE THIS TO TO THE MOVIE ‘BIRTH OF A NATION’ YOU MAKE STEPHIN FETCHIT SEEM LIKE MALCOLM X. MOST MEN THAT FIGHT WOMEN RARELY FIGHT ANOTHER MAN. WE RESPECT OUR BLACK WOMAN LESS THAN ANY OTHER RACE RESPECTS THEIR FEMALE COUNTERPART.ONLY A UNCLE TOM WOULD MAKE A SONG 99 PROBLEMS BUT A BITCH AINT ONE. ONLY A PUNK ASS BLACK MAN SHOUD RESPOND LIKE THAT.
For those who argue because they like to hear themselves talk, all this post is, is pearls before swine’s feet. They say ignorance is bliss…but ignorance is just ignorance.
Hitting women is wrong period, I despise that… however when a 25 year old woman is acting a fool in public,didnt pay her fair,put her hands on the bus driver and spit on him,put everyone and herself in danger…she gets no sympathy from me…If you make your bed hard you got to lay in it…what is more disturbing is how alot of people want to deflect and deny the obvious…hypocrytes! Talkin bout he shouldve nicely asked her to leave…really? I highly doubt these people would be so diplomatic if this happened to them…
There were a hundred other courses of action he could’ve taken aside from that. He hit the sista with enough force to kill her….. No exaggeration. That was a vintage Mike Tyson uppercut…… devastating. The kind that makes you bite your tongue off and bleed out. She was dead wrong in her behavior….. Inexcusable…… But c’mon bro. Really? A good mush off the bus woulda sufficed :O/
Many of you seem to be missing the obvious. You tend to focus primarily on the bus driver’s response. But consider a few things for a moment:
1. The bus driver was 59 years old. Basically a senior citizen. He comes from an era when young folks knew to respect their elders or risked communal punishment if they didn’t.
2. The ‘woman’ in question was 25 years old. Far from a child.
My question is: What has happened to our community when a 25 year old woman finds it acceptable to not only strike, but to SPIT ON a senior citizen?! Do you know how nasty someone’s SPIT is?!
Someone mentioned about reversing the races. Lets do that. If this had been a 59 year old white male bus driver, that sister never would’ve broken bad on him. She damn sure wouldn’t strike or spit on him. You rarely hear of black women attacking white men. And you know why? Because sisters know the repercussions os swift justice that would surely follow. Not to mention a sick love and respect many have for white men.
But you hear and see black women jumping up in a brother’s face all the time. Remember the situation that happened in the Manhattan McDonald’s earlier this year; when two black girls acting all mannish jumped behind the counter and attacked a brother who worked there? They both took one for the team too, just like this out of pocket sister on the bus. All 3 are lucky to have escaped with their lives.
Our black women have been conditioned to have little to no respect for black men in general; even the seniors among us. And though this is not indicative of ALL sisters, it is for far too many. I hope this incident is a wake up call for many of you.
This I know for sure, change the color of the skin this would not have happened. Changed the gender to white male, this would not have happened. It appears some black men only get their courage when attacking black women. As someone mentioned above, this person would not have rolled out on a white person and I would say any other racial group. This black bus driver would’ve become very contemplative before acting out. Enough with all the labels (hoodrat ghetto) it does not justify his conscious deliberate response.
All I want to know is why didn’t. The bus driver’s assistant step in? He was just standing there like he wasn’t at work and eventually got pushed down before the bus was shifted into park, the bus driverunbuckled his seatbelt and unleashed the sickest uppercut seen by man. If the bys driver is wrong, so us everyone else that was on that bus. Someone could have intervened. Personal opinion.
Great article by the way. The truth can be too real for people sometimes.
@Bonita, African people in America are the ONLY ethnic group that fail to teach the boys that they must protect themselves, the women and children by any AND all means necessary. This is a violent world and one does not meet violence with turtling and showing your yellow belly. This is one of the reason everybody kicks our asses…including the dysfunctional among us. Jail! shoot we are already in Jail. Fear? A coward dies a thousand times! Why do you think many of us don’t roll up on Caucasian people? Because of the fear of being body bagged. I teach my sons and daughters the same thing.
This is a perfect example of the lack of respect we have for one another as a people. Our values have totally changed. I’m not a bus driver, but I’ve ridden the bus long enough to know they have one of the hardest jobs on the planet. I don’t condoned what the bus driver did, but I understand why. He even said it in the video, the same reason why some brothers leave their children behind because they can’t get along with the child’s mother. I don’t agree with it either, but I understand it. Our roles have changed where our women choose to act like a man rather than act like the person they were created to be, the nurturer, comforter, and all the other qualities the women possesses.
The man is supposed to be the provider, protector, and all the other attributes the man possesses, but he has relinquished his duties as well. But everything has become mixed up and one of the reasons is because we follow behind what other people do instead of what we should do and used to do. We now rely on people outside our community for everything, even how to act, as we watch the destruction of the family continue to deteriorate following behind them. Until we come together as a people and rely on ourselves to solve our problems, this lack of respect for one another will continue and even get worse.
Black Unity means financial independence and happiness
I hope you did not really tell your son that it was okay and even justifiable to “body bag” someone. Killing someone WILL put him in jail, if he’s lucky only until the trial. But you know the consequences if he’s found guilty.
There are two parts to this thing.
1. If you don’t want to be a sufferer of violence, you don’t start it — “Don’t start no mess, won’t be no mess.” The sista failed on that.
2. You cannot have certain rights without certain responsibilities — those of us women who want to be treated like ladies need to accept the responsibility to act in a way worthy of that level of respect. The sista failed on that.
The Law of Reciprocity is no respector of persons; you will reap what you sow, and the sista got exactly what she sowed, planted on her chin. Now, there is a side matter — we expect our professionals and public servants, no matter their gender, to be able to handle themselves a little better than the general public. I understand therefore why the brotha lost his job; few employers can have an employee around after the employee puts his hands on the customer. The general public simply will not have that; after all, we have been socialized to believe that the customer is always right. This violent, disrespectful sista proves that what we have been taught to believe is not always the case… but just like she has to live with the consequence of putting her hands on him, he and his family likewise will have to deal with the consequences of him putting his hands on her in response.
@Mack…you beat me to it brother!
Let me jump in before the reactionaries get rolling. The brother was fired from his job…flat out and the young girl was in actuality a 25 year old adult. So we now have an unemployed brother with a family to take care of with a pending law suite no doubt and criminal charges for striking a an aggressive and belligerent attacker and a female who when this dies down will get sympathy more so than he will get props for hitting back. And at the end of the day the world once again sees us in our nigger moment, to the delight of those inside and outside the family that hate us.
@ Nojma:
Thanks for keeping it real sister.
Mark:
Theres a big difference a black woman and a full blown hoodrat. This 25 year old grown ass woman was a full blown HOODRAT. She deserves no special treatment, she gets no ‘lady pass’. She acted the way she wanted to be treated. And she got just what she asked for.
Keep in mind too: this 25 year old full grown full blown hoodrat chick has been shot before, stabbed before, and I’m willing to bet she’s had her fair share of rumbles with men before. When he decked her and threw her off the bus, she came back on and tried to fight him some more!
Your cape is flapping in the wind on this one homie. This chick does NOT need any saving. If anything she needs some serious counseling and etiquette training.
What if the bus driver was white, I bet you would be singing another tune? You’re article seems to justify Black men hitting unruly Black women. Men in nature are stronger than men, so they have the responsibility not to use excess force. This site should be stating how to use their strength responsibly, not excessively. He could have grabbed her or kicked her off the bus. But punching her in the face, is a little too much. I understand defending oneself, but he took it too far. Black women are the most undefended/criticized people in the United States. This woman bashing shit needs to stop and it need to start with black men defending their women.
The whole incident was a “nigga moment” at it’s best. None of us know what transpired prior to the start of the taping and the driver was being just as beligerent as the girl was. At the end of the day both of them were wrong for whatever part that they took in the charade.
Nojma, I totally agree with your article and have spoken these exact same words for years…this is EXACTLY what is wrong with not only our male/female interactions, but how we teach our children…this was a girl/young woman (not sure how old she was), but had she been privy to any home training or discipline, she would know better than to be standing there and disrespecting any adult like that. And by that I mean corporal punishment because its apparent that someone at some point in time needed to lay a belt to her a**…
This is an embarrassment to Blacks as a whole and again, its not because of his reaction…he may have been just a bit overboard with the uppercut to the chin, but I can’t fault him because at that point he couldn’t know what she was capable of doing. This is just another scar upon us as an ethnic organization, because this girl was simply lost in the shuffle…the village has once again failed its inhabitants.