(ThyBlackMan.com) Everyone is looking for love. We want it. There is nothing wrong with that, but sometimes, in the midst of wanting something so badly, we can become blind to red flags that should not be ignored.
There is a stigma attached to manhood that wanting to experience a loving relationship and intimacy is not manly. That is so not the case. As humans, we are created to want closeness and all that comes with it. But how do you know when you are dealing with a woman that is right for you? What if she’s not the one?
Fellas, I know it takes a lot to let down your guard, but just because you’re willing to do that doesn’t mean she deserves you. So, here are some good indications that the woman you are with might not be the one.
She Makes You Choose Between Her and Something Important To You
A selfish woman is a toxic thing to have around you. If the woman you are thinking about marrying makes you choose between her and your family or something that you truly love, she doesn’t have your best interests at heart. This is a red flag because as your relationship progresses, she will continue with the same kind of behavior which does not come from a place of love.
She Always Criticizes You
A woman should be a peace to the man in her life, not a constant source of shame or judgment. There is a difference between constructive criticism and the kind that seeks to strip a man of his pride. If your girl always has something to say about you or makes you feel less of a man, she’s not the one, bro.
She Doesn’t Support You
Let’s face it, not every woman is wifey material. If she doesn’t support you or believe in what you are trying to achieve, it will hinder you. The truth is, a woman can make or break a man, and if you don’t have a good one, you will never get to where you’re trying to go. Her lack of support could be from jealousy, insecurity or a number of other feelings, but that’s not your problem. Your job is to recognize the signs and if you see them, make the choice that is best for your wellbeing.
She Doesn’t Bring Anything to the Table
Too often women believe that men are the ones who have to convince us they’re worthy of our time. The same rings true of the reverse. Women vet men all the time and men have to do the same. The sad truth is if she doesn’t have anything going for her, doesn’t bring much to the table, and doesn’t see anything wrong with that, she’s not the one.
Don’t let the idea of what your life should be force you to make bad relationship decisions. Also, don’t let the fear of being alone do that either. Know the signs of a woman who still has some growing to do and act accordingly.
Staff Writer; Rasheda Abdullah
Great points I must say as a marriage, family and relationship counselor for over a decade. I would encourage brothers to up your standards and have a well-defined selection process. Don;t just think with your heart, think with your head. And not the one below the waist.
If she wants you to have so much in place already, what does she have in place? If she wants you to provide, is she willing to submit? Both biblical concepts