(ThyBlackMan.com) Unless you live under a social media rock, you are likely aware that it was reported very recently that (as Alex Hardy refers to her) Saint Janet Damita Jo Jackson and her husband, Wissam Al Mana, have split after 5.16666667 years of marriage. You also know that Janet Jackson is reportedly worth $175 million (according to reports, natch) and Al Mana is reportedly worth nearly a billion (according to reports, more natch).
You probably also read or read somebody repeat the statements from that TMZ article about how many prenuptial agreements have length of time markers, typically 5- or 10-year points, which, once reached, delineate how much money a particular spouse will receive in spousal support, etc.
THEN you read that, much like Paul Wall, Janet had the internet going nuts because according to an ashy meme, Janet waited until
the 5-year mark to cash in on a speculated ass $500 million takeaway from the entire ordeal. According to a Page Six article, she looks to maybe receive $200 million IN AN AGREED UPON agreement. Of course, the sources are “family” who maybe talk too much. Maybe.
Point is, we’re all without facts. Yet, without facts, niggas jumped out the window. My timeline has been inundated with shade towards Janet Jackson for being a gold-digger that’s going after buddy’s money. Janet Motherfucking Jackson, who has done nothing to anybody but give us Rhythm Nation 1814, the Janet album, beaucoup gorgeous pictures, the cutest adult laugh of all time, the Rhythm Nation 1814 mini-movie that starred a pre-Kaine Tyrin Turner, some super questionable but “aww, she tried” acting in Tyler Perry films Why Did I Get Married and Why Did I Get Married, Too?, and a basket of other kittens that we should all be thankful for.
But nope, some folks (read mainly men) decided to jump on the Janet Jackson as moneygrubbin’ woman who is out for a man’s dividends train. And since all clowns love a good parade, the suspect police was out in full force feeding each other like Gremlins after midnight.
I don’t know Janet personally. I’ve been to several concerts and if I squinted real hard, I might could make a case that she was singing to me, but I’m probably making that up. For the most part, I’m just a guy standing in front of a television screen (or tablet or smart phone) watching an artist that has been a literal part of my entire life who is befuddled, Plymouth rock landing on me confused by how idiotic so many people seem behind this. Sure there are some jokes. That’s fine; ain’t no celeb above some humor at their expense. But there are actual people, and news outlets, with fallacious accusations and whimsical non-sense rooted in abject conjecture and nincompoopery.
Janet Jackson is already rich and has been already rich longer than many of us have been alive. What she look like comin’ after the pockets of a man she clearly didn’t have to marry for money.
