I didn’t feel like I was bowing down begging him saying ” Oh baby baby forgive me for I have sinned” mentality. Like I said,I wanted to forgive and being truthful about my past and present. There are some self hating people I this world who are so mad at their community that they don’t realize how foolish they look making themselves look like candidates for White supremacists and eventually doing themselves in.

I’m not married nor do I have kids but if I did,I would have feared for them in the past..fearing of spreading lies to them ,making them hate themselves and other Black people. That could have been me years ago but something on the back of mind kept saying be open minded ,learn the truth about people and judge people as correctly as possible.

Though I respect people’s opinions ,its also embarrassing how anybody down themselves…whether the person be Black men or women ..its nauseating. As I said, Ive gotten disappointed by many people in my community and could have been anti Black man but I didn’t want to be that way though because it looked foolish.I didn’t want my mom to think she made a mistake when having me or thinking that something was wrong with her because of who she is or my brothers because they are Black men.

I don’t see anything with both sides wanting to praise their community.I think that its a great thing especially how much White society is working heard to break that love up.I’m thankful that I have overcame my self hate. An open mind let you see the beauty of things. It allowed me to see the beauty and truth about Black men,was loved by one and no longer have any problems being loved / married to one.

Education, Dating Outside More, LightSkin vs Dark, Rape, Molestation, Father/Marriage Abandonment.

This is so hilarious… Never knew comedy was this sites objectives LOL

Years ago, I my former 11th grade teacher would tell me to ” look closer” ..in that case..it was about finding a good boy. If there was a guy that didn’t suit me I wouldn’t give him the time of day. Unfortunately and with lots of shame..that I didn’t want to deal with Black guys at the time.

It wasn’t that I thought lowly of them in every way..oh no..it was the opposite..I thought that they wouldn’t think much of me.You see..I was eccentric..didn’t think much of myself and it didn’t help that there were kids..who just happened to be Black..that bullied me.
It also didn’t help that I had self hating ” friend ” who thought that Black boys back then were the devil and wanted me to date White guys. Even with all of the problems with my self worth,it still baffled me on how she could down herself like that but also still convinced that White was right at the time.( For the record,I didn’t think non Black men also wouldn’t like me neither).

Slowly but surely..things begin to change a little before I graduated from high school. I attended a step show at an HBCU with my brother and his friend. Once the show began..I looked at all of these Black guys..really sexy..doing their thing on the gym floor.It was like my egg was cracking..seeing the truth about Black men…but still scared of dating one. Once I’ve graduated,I would be exposed to a who new world..the beauty and truth of people.

Several years ago..I can’t describe it but something came over..like lightning..lol! As I just said,I’ve never hated Black men but scared of them for rejection only this time my fear of them left. Though I’ve never found them to be unattractive but my mental sensors made them look even more attractive to me..sexy..I just wanted to be with a Black man for him to love and hold me..I dated one and though were no longer together, I still look at Black men with high regard.That was years ago.

Recently,a friend of mine asked me could I date a Black man? Let me answer this question as I told her in a why-do-I-love-Black men answer kind of way: I love their “swag”,strength, the way they look,spirit ans here is another thing about Black men that I love about them.I’ve been on blogs reading on a million and one reason why I shouldn’t be with Black men because they won’t be there in your time of need.We’ll I won’t speak for other Black women but the Black men I knew were real gentlemen..my heroes..knights in shining armour. Even if all Black men were to pass me..one thing I know..there will always be one that will be by my side.

Now I see what my former teacher meant by ” looking closer ” ..at people and life. You often hear about the once you go Black you don’t go back mantra in reference to mixed Black/ non Black couples. Well I’m African American and I feel that way not because of the saying or I’m supposed to.There is this something-something about them that draws me to them. I just can’t see myself letting them go.

Outside of the psychological and philosophical world exists a place called “real time,” In real time the woman is not the man’s partner in crime but his hostage and victim. The author sees the children as the victims but in real time the children are now the adults.

A adult is now the writer with a distorted view of who’s really responsible for a “WoMen’s Distorted Intimacy.” Her distortion of blame is what makes her perspective the classic Patty Hearst Syndrome.

The black woman is a victim of the black man’s insecurities. The black woman is merely guilty through her association with black men. The only thing the black woman is guilty of is trying to like, love, live and work with the black man. All she ever asked in return is for the black man to respect her, love her, not to lie to her or hurt her.

Blessed are the pure in heart
As a child the black girl is pure in heart, mind, body, soul and spirit. As an adult the black woman is still pure in heart and have great aspirations and respect for the earth. A black woman is inherently filled with love, honor and high regard for the sacredness of intimacy of marriage between a man and woman.

The black woman still hungers and thirst for marriage and childbirth however; when the black man is done putting her down, fattening her up, beating her up, putting her out, giving her diseases and overall making sure that she is broken, defeated and demoralized what else could she do but try and survive for the benefit of her children that are now watching as she watched as a child.

The black woman didn’t become a perverted drug addict, prostitute or party girl without great manipulation and intense pressure from the black man. The black woman isn’t by nature prone to homelessness, mental illness or suicide. The black woman is a victim and prisoner of a black man’s ignorance, insecurities, fear, abuse, perversions and cowardliness.

The black woman however remains resilient generation after generation of ignorance, fear, abuse, perversions and hatred perpetrated against her by the black man. The black woman despite her trial and tribulations still has a heart of love, forgiveness and respect.

The black woman is forever with the spirit of forgiveness and any distorted views of intimacy she has is not her fault. It is the black mans ignorance, fear, abuse, perversion and hatred for him that has corrupted, destroyed, contaminated and brought the black woman to odds with her views, heart and the Holy Spirit. In real time the black woman is not jaded towards marriage and childbirth.

Through sincere affection her “Distortion of Intimacy” can be corrected. It is by the grace of God’s Holy Spirit that if left alone to dwell in the spirit her heart and spirit will rebound and respond to sincere affection from a sincere man. Through sincere affection she will once again reflect with a pure heart the undistorted love of God.

Anything that the black woman participates in that appears to be in sync with the black man’s decadent, immoral, hedonistic and cowardly behavior is not her fault nor should she be held accountable or considered to be anything more than his hostage and victim in the distortion of intimacy.

The defense “it takes two to tangle” is a invalid argument when the man is superior in strength, threatening, intimidating and prone to verbal abuse, spousal abuse and violent acts, sometimes fatal acts against women.

There is no case to be made that a “WoMen’s Distorted Intimacy” are deliberate acts. The black woman view of intimacy isn’t distorted it’s contaminated.

Any corruption or decadence on her part can be laid directly at the black man’s feet. The black woman’s mind, body, soul and spirit were pure and healthy prior to the black man’s contamination of her morals and decency.

For the black woman’s cleansing, purification and restoration the black man must find the courage to face responsibility and not be afraid of his own life.

The black man must stop taking it out on the black woman that he lacks courage. The black man is solely responsible for his own actions and for a black woman’s “Distortion of Intimacy.” Any “Distortion of Intimacy” by the black woman is behaviour due to no fault of her own.

Any “Distortion of Intimacy” by the black woman is clearly “Fruit from a Poisoned Tree.”

Please accept my apology for spelling your name incorrectly in my previous post.

When I watched the Sister Nojoma’s video at: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o7e4BNI4__w, I thought I heard her say: “To read my letter go to “blackmen dot com.” So, that’s where I went. I landed on a gay black male porno site.

SUGGESTION: Please include the following URL in any communication regarding Sister Nojoma’s letter:

http://thyblackman.com/2011/11/23/an-open-letter-of-apology-to-black-men-in-hopes-of-reconciliation/

Oh, and when I make reference to the removal of and blatant invisibility of the black, female image (and it happening before slavery), much of this happened during ancient Egypt, and during the Moorish conquest of Europe and North Africa. The Nubians stood strong against this, which is why they are still in existence to this day.

In reading your responses, I would just like to offer that perhaps as to telling black women that the Willie Lynch letter (which, there are been speculations of this letter being fake, by the way-though, I am not denying the rational and reality behind it) is a reflection to “themselves,” how about we begin to address how our remove, hatred, and rendered invisibility of the feminine, has negatively impacted Black women and men in the community? I would like to pose for discussion how removal from the healing powers of love, nurture, and comfort of the “Dark woman,” (a lot of which was done before slavery-prior to the first Africans coming to this country, and during slavery) has greatly contributed to the dysfunction that spiritual illness that has take place in our community. It would be great to address how the continued SICKNESS of telling black women to “choose” between their race and their gender contributed to what we are experiencing, by symbolically removing the feminine essence. Let me ask you, what other group of people have encouraged the women of their community to do this???? How has the overt hyper masculinity of black maleness and patriarchy negatively impacted black women AND black men? I think by connecting with such questions, we can begin to peel apart the Willie Lynch letter far more accurately. The separation of a community from their feminine existence HEAVILY TOOK PLACE in our community during slavery, through blaming and vilifying the women who continue to birth your existence. Let me ask you something, have you ever wondered why our community of people have been the only ones OPENLY ENCOURAGED to rebuke and deny our feminine image??