(ThyBlackMan.com) As a parent I’ve come to value the sacrifices my parents made for me, and my siblings. Raising children is a joy, but it is a great challenge. Both mom and dad bring something different to the table that balances out the child when both are allowed to parent effectively. Dads are often downplayed when talking about the importance of a parent. They feel just as deeply as mothers and love just as hard. when they are not hindered, they are supportive, nurturing and tend to allow a child to experience a different kind of adventure. Parenthood is not a cookie cutter affair, and neither is fatherhood. When I think about my dad, he’s one of the most unique people I’ve had the pleasure to know. He parented according to the need of the individual child while also building a universal foundation that equally applied to everyone. Being an effective dad, like mom, takes work and no one is perfect. Below are five tips that seem to help give their children the best they have.
1. Parent equally…leave gender out of it. Raise your children to have the same standards. What you require of your sons should be the same things you require of your daughters. Where your daughter has social restrictions so should your son. You set the foundation with your eldest child and all other children should stick to the blueprint. I remember having a midnight curfew as a senior in high school. I’m the eldest of my parents’ children, and my younger brother had the same curfew as a senor in high school. Everyone cooked, cleaned, cut grass and put out trash. No one was able to accuse dad of being bias nor sexist.
2. Never allow society to tell you when to be there for your children. attend their sporting events, and other school events. Know about the state of your kids’ health especially when they are minors. If your child asks you to be there with them in an uncommon situation be there. When I gave birth to my first child my father was one of the people in the delivery room. I felt I needed him there, and he was there. Don’t let society put you in a box.
3. Allowing your children to come to you about anything will make you an effective dad. It’s understandable that you are tired on many days but allowing them to shower you with their daily excitement when they are young will create a relationship by which they are used to talking to you. This communication can help you guide your children as they get older. You can help them side step some of life’s landmines because they know, even when you have to correct them, you will always hear what they have to say.
4. Let your children see that you are human. Within reason allow your children to see your triumphs and talk to them about places where you might have made a different choice. In this they know dad is not perfect, nor is he prideful. When you have to give the lecture or correction it’s easier for them to relate to you. This grows a deep respect over time.
5. Have fun with your children. Before you know it your babies will be adults. Cherish the time you have with them. When having fun its okay to be a big kid with them. Never allow anyone to judge you for having a blast with your children. You are creating memories with them that will outlive you. One day its those moments that will comfort them.
Dads are simply amazing! When I think back on my father my heart is both heavy, and full of gratitude. Know that your children will one day realize the sacrifices your made for them. They will refer to you for council and cherish everything you have given them. Fathers unite together to encourage one another, as the love of your children encourages you to help them become their best person.
Staff Writer; Christian Starr
May connect with this sister over at Facebook; https://www.facebook.com/christian.pierre.9809 and also Twitter; http://twitter.com/MrzZeta.