(ThyBlackMan.com) In the 21st century, the process of dating and being in a relationship has changed drastically from what is has been. Once upon a time, sophisticated courting, chivalry and “taking it slow” was the norm for those dating. Now, dating consists of following each other on all social media sites, hanging out at each other’s houses instead of going on actual dates, and falling in love way too quickly. Relationships today are doomed from the beginning because many jump into relationships without spending the proper time getting to know their significant other.
Many believe that they are in relationships because they’re in love when really; they are just infatuated by the idea of having a significant other. The beginning of a relationship is like building a house, without a strong foundation, it will crumble! With the way
relationships are conducted in the black community today, there is little to no room for longevity.
Everything happens in the very early stages of the relationship and there is practically nothing left to keep each other interested after a few months, marriage becomes the furthest thought. Black men, along with some black women, look at marriage as a sense of being tied down, it holds them back. Meanwhile black women, and a few black men, just like many others, have daydreams of their future husband or wife and family. Nevertheless, not all black men and women are afraid of commitment. There are a few that do take that leap over the broom and get married, but it just takes the right person!
The truth is some Black women are just plain stupid! And many scream how they want a good Black man, but when one is staring them in the face, they don’t even recognize him because the list is ridiculous, they expect perfection, or gives a man no room for growth, yet expect all the concessions in the world. Further, they expect him to bring everything to the table, while they come with nothing but an appetite. Some Black women come with superficial crap and to add insult to injury, they pass him up, go get some knucklehead and then blame all of Black creation for their stupidity!
According to a report in the Journal of Marriage and the Family, a study of 926 single people ages 19 to 25 found that 23 percent of all single black men never want to marry. Only 13 percent of all black women, Hispanic women and white men rejected matrimony, and 11 percent of white women. Most attracted to marriage: Hispanic men, of whom just 7 percent demurred. Researchers suggest that the differences are due to two things: that marriageable black women outnumber black men, and brothers’ strong “peer group attachments” on which marriage would intrude.
Contrary to popular belief, there are good Black men out there. Most are not in prison, most are not gay, and most are not “no good.” That’s a lie, and somebody made you to believe some “okey doke.” Believe it or not, black men are afraid to get married. It doesn’t take a sociology major, news report, or study to see the apprehension black men have towards marriage. It just takes a few shots and a relationship with a hand full of them before they open up about their feelings.
Staff Writer; Amber Ogden
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