Black Community Dysfunction-A discussion swept under the rug.

by Staff July 15, 2016 7 Comments News Opinion Relationships Weekly Columns

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(ThyBlackMan.com) As most of us know there’s a lot of dysfunction and discord in the black community. Yet when people come forth to open dialogue about it they’re ridiculed and talked about in a negative way by their own family and/or friends. Talking about hard core real issues within the black community is like pulling teeth from a lion’s mouth. We want to turn a blind eye to the issues being discussed because we are not willing to hear the truth about how our family and community is dysfunctional. We’re excusing abuse (all levels from sexual to financial) by trumping up how the abuser(s) is a good person/people thus failing to call that individual(s) out on their BS. You have family members who act like hoodrats, thugs, and bums doing stuff that’s not right such as having a boatload of kids with multiple mothers/fathers and not taking care of them.

Other issues that arise is the fact that there’s a lot of financial BlackCommunity-2016 discord within the black community as well with so many living above means (mainly black women) and doing things like co-signing for cars, credit cards, and loan applications for a man they’re not married to and wind up being the one who’s having to pay the bill. It’s stuff like that which addresses the nonsense within the community with black women taking care of a man they’re not married to.

Chronic incarcerations among black men is contributing to the dysfunction and discord because they can’t do anything for their children, wives, and significant others. What can a man who is locked up do aside from writing letters, calling home, and getting periodical visits? Nothing and is likely to return to prison on a parole violation and/or on a new case. We as a people refuse to address some issues within the community because it seems as if it’s a badge of shame to call out individual(s) on their BS nonsense.

Yet you’ll see someone’s mama or grandmother acting a fool in court when the sentence is handed down crying about how their baby is ‘innocent’. Nobody wants to speak up and keep it real about the dysfunctional mess that has the black community practically destroyed. It’s enough to say that we are OK and accepting of BS, abuse, mistreatment and disrespect. What is also noticeable is how people are often ostracized if they are speaking out about how the black community covers up for those doing wrong.

We don’t hold anyone accountable and when you do it’s always viewed as you’re the troublemaker and the one causing drama. How is holding someone or somebody accountable for BS, abuse, mistreatment, and disrespect causing “drama”? That also follows the path many blacks take when they don’t want to own up to what they or others have created. Until we as a race decide to stop making excuses and covering up for others when they are doing wrong and calling them out on it the black community will never heal and move forward to cultivate the next generation to build their communities instead of tearing them down.

Staff Writer; Nafeesah Abdullah

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mu octavis taalib says:
August 1, 2016 at 9:12 pm
Great reasoning behind this piece. It would serve the Afr Amer community well by owning up to our shortcomings rather than constantly harping on our “superiority” from the supposed glory days of Africa.
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Dcarter910 says:
July 31, 2016 at 10:22 pm
Marque,
Can you stick to the topic that the writer has brought up instead of trying to force your agenda on others? Fine, believe what you want when you want and despite my words, where you want but can you at least show respect to other writers on this blog site? Black people like you are a part of the problems we as a people face. No one can bring up any topic, dissect it, discuss it and build on it without another black person showing up with their own agenda and “firebombing” the thought stream.
As for the writer of this blog, I certainly agree. It is terribly hard to even have conversations with other black people about the things you mentioned in your blog. It is why I have “nearly” given up on the greater black community. It is one of feckless leaders, intellectual dishonesty and cowards in the face of obvious truths. Truth that can heal and strengthen the black community and dispel the lies that currently keep it in mental arrest.
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Marque Anthony says:
July 23, 2016 at 5:57 pm
Abuse is happening to men as well as women. Did you know that the same federal stats that show over a million women abused each year also show over 837,000 men are victims of abuse as well? And that’s just the physical abuse. There is also sexual, emotional, psychological abuse. Even spiritual abuse is going on in too many churches like under Eddie Long, the pedophile who should be in jail for child molestation.
You might also be interested to know that over 95% of the time kids are awarded to the mother in a divorce yet reputable stats show that child abuse is 16% higher when the mom is the custodial parent than when the dad is the custodial parent. These stats are kept from the public in order to sway public opinion in favor of the female. NOBODY SHOULD BE HIT or ABUSED.
Then there is the issue of child abuse because so many of you use violence as a means of disciplining your children. Neglect is swept under the rug far too often and many parents do not know where discipline stops and where abuse starts.
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Marque Anthony says:
July 23, 2016 at 5:56 pm
To What The Hel,
Why are you so obsessed with ignorance, allowing someone to call you something you are NOT, failing to acknowledge what your eyes see and failing to overstand how negative perceptions affect negative attitudes and actions? You need a lesson in basic psychology and sociology. Stop sticking your head in the sand and look at the facts. Call yourself what you are. You are not too bright and how people perceive us inaccurately is part of the problem.
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What-the-hel! says:
July 16, 2016 at 7:00 pm
Marque: Why are you so obsess with the color Black? Even if black folks called themselves Gold people all the problem we have would still be there.
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Marque Anthony says:
July 16, 2016 at 3:07 am
YOU CANNOT EMPOWER OUR PEOPLE WITH THE TRUTH WHILE USING A LIE THAT WAS USED TO CHAIN THEM.
It amazes me how many of you are still brainwashed to call yourselves BLACK. Black is the color of your car tires, not your skin. The white oppressive slave trader called you black and himself white to set up a contrast and to attach negative images and denotations to you based on a lie about color. Look up BLACK in the dictionary.
Research even shows that blacks are perceived by other groups as very different from African Americans. But we still keep calling ourselves what someone else defined us as, what we are not and what has a negative dictionary denotation in society. WAKE UP. LOOK AT THE REAL COLOR OF YOUR SKIN. YOU ARE NOT BLACK. You are an African American. The lie of calling us black and defining us by color (the wrong color) has been in place so long that our people accept it as truth – but it’s not. Know your colors.
Native Americans do not allow others to call them red men. Asians do not accept being called yellow men. Hispanics do not answer to “what’s up brown man”. And Caucasians are not white, notebook paper is white. Wake up and see the plan where white racist supremacists plotted to redefine our people from Africa. STOP CALLING YOURSELF SOMETHING THAT YOU ARE NOT!
AFRICAN AMERICANS ARE NOT BLACK.
Black is the color of your car tires, not your skin author. Being called “black” is a lie and it should be offensive. Haitians, Jamaicans and even Africans do not accept being called “black”, Why do you think that is? They are identified by tribes, klans, geographic areas and their respective countries.
By using the very term black to describe us, we are doing the following:
1. Using a term white oppressors and slave masters gave us.
2. Letting someone else define us other than our own people.
3. Calling ourselves something we are not.
4. Buying into thee lie and the negative denotation. Check the dictionary.
5. Being set apart in a way that no other ethnic group allows. Native Americans are not called Red Man. Asians are not called Yellow Man. Hispanics are not called Brown Man. They do not and will not accept being defined by color and by some other race or ethnic group at that.
6. Ignoring our actual color (brown) which means brainwashing has worked. Any time someone can get an entire race, ethnic group or culture to ignore what they are and call themselves what they factually are not, THEY HAVE BEEN INDOCTRINATED, ASSIMILATED AND BRAINWASHED.
7. Playing right into the oppressor’s profiles and stereotypes. Did you know studies show there is a different perception of black people than there is of African Americans? Words create perceptions and perceptions create actions towards us.
WAKE UP. You know your colors. And even though others around the world equated our ancestors with the color of the soil in Africa or the meaning of negro/negroid, that does not change the fact that WE ARE BROWN – NOT BLACK.
Facts are facts and YOU ARE BROWN, NOT BLACK. When you receive the revelation of why they keep calling African Americans “black” and Caucasian people “white”, you may just wake up!
STOP LETTING OTHER GROUPS DEFINE YOU WITH AN OBVIOUS LIE that we have heard and accepted so much that we believe it’s true and forget our colors. The de-programming has to take root or African Americans will forever be defined, limited and oppressed by those who get us to accept a lie.
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