(ThyBlackMan.com) Black men in America have had to deal with a lot of challenges and there are things that now they need to put an end to. Some which is logical in nature because a lot of that behavior you see in black men are often times fueled by their mothers. As it is very known in the black community everything surrounds mom or grandma, but did you know that some of the thing a mother does is stuff that her son or grand son should not still be doing in 2016.
1. Get out of Mom and Grandma’s house-There’s an increased trend that many women find appalling and disturbing and that is grown men living at home with their mother. Why is this happening in 2016 and we’re all aware that the economic structure of many ethnic communities is a bit shaky, yet why are grown adult men finding it easier to live at home with mom or grandma? We also need to take a look at how a mother and/or grandmother’s role shapes a man’s life. Some mothers and grandmothers are not in the way respecting the adult threshold by letting that man be a man. Too many mothers and grandmothers are enabling their sons and grandsons from living their lives like productive adult men should be doing. Also living at home with mom and grandma can hurt your dating life because of the lack of privacy and space. Some men have mothers and grandmothers who don’t know how to respect boundaries in terms of that man dating and entertaining a lady.
2. Stop dating and having relationships with HOODRATS-Some of the most intelligent and well-rounded brothers are taking up dating hoodrats. Why would any man with the sense God gave him be finding himself with women who are not the most intelligent and lack home training? You also have to take into consideration that hoodrats want a man to take care of them and they only know how to spend money. drink, getting high, and having babies. Why would you want to date a woman who’s sole purpose is to get money out of a man and putting him through the ringer with a lot of pointless nonsense. This type of woman you DO NOT under any circumstance wife up. Leave this type of woman alone and do yourself a favor by not getting sexually involved with one either and deal with women on your level meaning they have the same qualities as you.
3. Stop dating and having relationships with BOUGHIE women-Why are so many guys falling for women that remind you of the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air’s Hillary Banks and Braxton Family Values’ Tamar Braxton. Why do men find this type of woman attractive? Raised in the hood, but acting stuck-up and conceited. Men have to spend time bending over backwards to please this type of woman because nothing will ever be good enough. Boughie women have unrealistic expectations of men wanting them to have high paying jobs, fancy cars, and eating out at expensive restaurants. A man has enough on his plate than to deal with a woman who is judgmental and views people and things as beneath her. Pass that kind of woman on by you’re settling if you think a woman like that has something real to offer you.
4. Quit Playing House With Women-Black men are notorious for their penchant in shacking up with women they’re not married to. Today’s social norms make it easier for men not to commit to women and to just live with them. If a woman is good enough to lay up, sleep with, and have babies with she’s good enough to marry. Another issue is that the women are given a false sense of commitment when involved with men who only want to play house with them. Either marry the woman or let her go so she can be with someone that can give her the time and love she deserves.
5. Get a job and keep one-This is one trait a woman find deplorable is a man who’s chronically unemployed that tells her he’s not husband material or mature to be a man who can provide and support his family. Having a job also symbolizes stability and also keep in mind too many gaps in a job history tells employers you are not a formidable employee if you could not keep a job for longer than a few months. So a lot of black men need to watch that because it’s a tell tale sign of his ability to support a wife and family.
6. Stop pushing up on women who tell you she’s taken/married/not interested-Why black men don’t take NO for an answer when a woman tells you she’s taken/married/not interested. If a woman won’t give you her number why continue to harass her. Leave her alone and move on because all you’re doing is annoying that woman by disrespecting her by continuing to ask her for her number. There’s too many other women out there to meet it’s not the end of the world if you et turned down. Also if a woman tells you that she’s taken or married respect her marital status and leave her alone.
7. Glorifying the gang and thug mentality-People constantly say this is a lifestyle when it’s a mentality. Idolizing violence, gang banging, frequent use of alcohol, and drug use. This is not to be admired by no means. It does not symbolize anything that relates to the black community in fact these elements are what is destroying it. It does not help when rappers are singing about violence and the disrespecting of women by sexualizing them on their albums and in their videos. This is how many women are victims of domestic violence due to men idolizing a lifestyle that does not need to exist.
8. Stop wearing your pants down to the crack of your a**-This is the most pathetic look for a black man. It’s not cute it’s actually disgusting and nobody needs to see what color boxers or briefs you wear. Here’s a fact that would make anyone want to hunt a belt down and that is the sagging of your pants was born in the prison system that was an indicator that you were available for sex. As many know homosexuality is very high in the prison system and many may think the sagging pants look is cool, but that’s what got many inmates raped in prison because the newcomers are unaware that wearing their pants sagging is sending a message to inmates that they were available for sexual activity.
9. Stop bragging about the size of your manhood-Unless you have a seriously low self-esteem that’s tacky and gross. What woman is going to be impressed with what’s in your pants your brain is in your head not your trousers. The size of your manhood does not define you as a person and most women would much rather you leave something to the imagination.
10. Stop acting like you’re God’s gift to women-Not every black woman wants a black man so don’t put yourself out there as if you’re all that and a bag of chips. With the change in dating norms you will find that not all black women want to date or marry black men. You need to be ok with that and not filling your head with stuff acting conceited.
Black men have a tendency to act like that as their way of compensating for what they fall short on. Black women are not going to deal with certain things out of black men so gentlemen if you want to be successful with women recognize when its time to leave some things behind and to make certain changes within your own life.
Staff Writer; Nafeesah Abdullah