Tuesday, May 30, 2017


You Might Walk Over, But You Limpin’ Back!

January 30, 2013 by  
Filed under News, Opinion, Relationships, Sista Talk, Weekly Columns

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(ThyBlackMan.com) This video(see below) is a clear example of how the black woman is out of control! Both of these Sisters, use the most vile and disrespectful language when speaking to the security guard(a Brother). They called him out of his name, and even had their children(mostly young boys)attack the Brother’s manhood by calling him gay. The Brother tried to walk away several times while the women still continued to antagonize him, and again, sent their children in the opening of the store to once again attack his man hood.

When he instructed the woman to get her kids, the Sister walked up on the Brother several times, he pushed her off of him, she walked up on him again….he pushed her away…she hit him and he broke out the taser gun and lit her up. Now the children are crying, and a Brother, who I guess is her man walks up on the security guard, talking about you did this in front of my babies? And says that he will be back at 6 to kick his a**.

Now first of all where was the Man when his woman was disrespectful and out of control? And his “in front of my babies” question should have been directed towards the MOTHER of his children, because SHE along with the other Sister set the wrong example for those children. After he lit her up, then folks started saying he was wrong for doing so, yet remained quiet when the Sistershoodmama continued on their rant against him. This reminds me of the bus driver incident, women think they can just run up on a man without any type of repercussions and that’s not the case.

The reason those watching remained quiet is because of several reasons;

1. The disrespect of the Black Man from the Black Woman has become so commonplace, it has been taught, pushed, promoted and accepted that it almost acts like a second nature, our slave master trained us well, so we disrespect our Black Men with ease.

2. We love indulging in savage behavior whether it is participating in it, whether we are a spectator, or if we chose to watch it on our TV. This is why the shows that portray us in the most negative light, have the highest ratings because we have grown so in love with filth.

Now, back to the Brother that miraculously appeared after everything took place between his woman and the security guard. Instead of directing his anger towards the security guard, he should have directed it towards the mother of his children. He was simping real hard, and this is why she will not accept accountability for her actions. The fact of the matter is, that sister deserved NO defense nor protection because she was out of CONTROL. You can NOT protect that which you can not control, and by him approaching the Security Officer, he gave his “woman” the illusion that she was justified, and she got another hole punched in her victim card. After you get so many holes punched, you become a VIP Victim Card Member. He has now enabled her ratchet behavior, and if she speaks to a stranger in that manner, I wonder how she speaks to him?

The bottom line is that she, among many other black women are so out of control, so rebellious, so disrespectful, so aggressive in their approach of men, yet when the man gives back that same aggression given to him, then she is ready to cry victim. Hypocrisy at it’s finest! There are consequences to every action, and while I certainly don’t condone any type of violence against women, I definitely don’t promote this masculine energy we as women have seemed to embrace, and we think we have the right to go toe to toe with men. I mean try it if you want to; this is how you end up on your ass!

Now think about the mindset of the Mothers, and how they encouraged their children, which again are young boys. What are they teaching them about WOMEN? If they’re mother, their first teacher is quick to disrespect a Black Man, how will it impact the way they look at Black Women in the FUTURE?

Look at the mental wombs of these women, and  the thoughts they produce. Obviously the Brother is lacking wisdom, and knowledge of himself, because if he truly knew who he IS, then he would NOT have placed his seeds in the womb of such a rebellious woman.  This also serves as a good example of how many Brothers will get themselves killed or hurt, dealing with a weak, rebellious and foolish woman. This Brother was ready to defend his woman, yet he had no basis, because HER MOUTH is what got her in that predicament.

This video, is only one of many, that showcases the mentality of not only our women, but men as well. This is a clear example of how the WOMAN must be cleaned up and reformed, before any other type of reformation can take place.

http://www.worldstarhiphop.com/videos/video.php?v=wshhOnSdy4PkJNdZ03i4 (——
Staff Writer; Nojma Muhammad
To learn more about this talented sister, feel free to visit; Nojma Reflects.

Comments

35 Responses to “You Might Walk Over, But You Limpin’ Back!”
  1. Peerless Perception says:

    Well written piece & Well said follow up. This was unabridged DYSFUNCTION caught on video. I’m sure that was the byproduct of generational ignorance. Most of us that grew up in the tenements or in poverty & managed to survive abhor the behavior displayed in the video because we know that it was gratuitous. We pull out the projects or ghetto behavior like an American Express, only when necessary. Unfortunately, I’ve seen the same behavior exhibited across the spectrum of color. Of course, ours is always a lil more animated.

    Fortunately, I am in a position to counsel my Brothers & Sisters and believe me when you have an individualized session with them, the behavior is very different. I’ve seen hardcore sisters breakdown and say no one has ever talked to them the way I have, nor have they had the patience to explain why we are where we are & why we behave the way we do.

    Family, the Sister only highlighted the behavior, its up to them to fix it. To all the Family members who took issue with the Sister exposing our dirty laundry, when is the last you took the time to educate one of those Sisters or Brothers you saw in the video?

  2. toomanygrandkids says:

    This is an example of black females who have no home training and/or continued this type of behavior into adulthood. It’s very easy for ghetto-minded, ratchet females to display the behavior of adults she grew up around. Obviously, this female isnt the bothered by the fact that her children are present listening to her use such language. In fact, ghetto, loud-mouthed bitches take pride in bragging that their children cuss. There’s one girl I know who’s 30 with 5 kids and another on the way. SHE told me herself that she knew ALL of her kids cussed. Her daughter, who’s in third grade, was overheard cussing at another child. When she asked her daughter what happened and the little woman-child put her hand on her hip and rolled her neck, repeating the cuss words she said the mom says, “That’s right baby. That’s how you earn respect.” To say I was flabbergasted is an understatement.

  3. Anne says:

    I meant that women can’t have it both ways by being verbally and physically disrespectful to MEN and not expect the same treatment in return.

  4. Anne says:

    I agree totally that the behavior of these women was out of line and completely indefensible. So was the behavior of the man who defended that uncouth behavior which occurred “in front of my babies.” The message that their kids take from this episode is that being loud, ignorant, and confrontational is the way to solve problems with other people. That said, it IS important not to make blanket statements about black women or black men. We are not monolithic by any means, and we come from many different walks of life. There’s also the issue of home training or the lack of it, which these women exhibited. It’s disheartening that people act like this, and that there are shows that glorify this kind of behavior in SOME black folks. People who don’t know many black folks most likely look at shows featuring this kind of behavior and think all of us are like that. As for feminism, it has attracted fringe elements just like any other movement. However, it’s not to blame for the behavior of these women. I do agree, though, that if people want respect, they have to act in a way that commands it. I also agree that women can’t have it both ways by being verbally or physically disrespectful to me and not expect the same treatment in return. With parents like these, not just the mothers, I don’t have too much hope for those kids unless they have another role model that’s positive.

  5. Kay Coleman says:

    This was an appropriate use of force on a female. I refuse to call this person a woman! Those poor children

  6. worldgirl says:

    What do you mean the Black woman? You mean these Black women is what you say.

    Based on that past article I read about how men are predators by nature, I’m beginning to wonder about this website and the people behind it. I’ve met men like you before. The Black men, the Black man that, the Black woman needs to know her place, so on and so forth, all men think with their penises, etc. Please speak for yourself. You can’t speak for all Black men and you can’t judge all Black women by a couple of hoodrats.

  7. Ramses says:

    Ashe!!!!!! If responsible black women don’t start speaking up like this sister does, then the destruction will continue to take place. When men speak, it becomes a gender war in which our words fall on deaf ears because feminism teaches women that they are perfect and do no wrong. Unfortunately, what many black women don’t realize is the very model that was used in slavery (subjugating men to women) formed the basis of feminism later on so the more you support this doctrine, the more you support your annihilation. Just food for thought. If you don’t wanna exist, fine by me. As long as responsible black women stay silent, they are complicit in the behavior of other black females. Many mothers are failing their daughters and making them unworthy of wife which is why you have generations of mothers, daughters, and granddaughters living with each other, with no man around. Mother jobless, dsughter a stripper taking care of her mother, and her daughter seeing her mother carry herself in that manner. Look out destruction is upon your heads and for dudes who say nothing you will be judged accordingly as well for standing by and saying nothing. Much respect for writing a gem of an article….always on point

  8. Nojma says:

    Peace Family!

    Some of the comments regarding my article don’t surprise me since deflection always makes it presence known and people always attempt to tell ME what my viewpoint or motives are, instead of simply asking me to clarify my position.

    Misognistic view? Michelle you have accused me of hating women…how can you prove that? What conversations have you had with me, when did you ask me what my position was, instead of assuming? What is your proof? Certainly not this ONE article that you have read. We have to be mindful of representing our opinion as if it is a fact, especially when it is an UNINFORMED opinion, meaning that you’ve given your opinion of me, charging me with something that you have no valid basis, because you know nothing about me, but you felt like you could make a charge against me with no proof.

    I don’t dabble in self hatred in the LEAST bit. I love who I am, from my skin that resembles the triple darkness that life is created in, to the very essence of my being. I love myself and those that look like me. I am totally, completely and truly in love with myself. However, I love myself enough to face and tackle the parts of me that aren’t pleasing to my spiritual eye or my physical eye. I love myself enough not to be delusional about my flaws and faults. I love myself enough to confront that which impedes my growth. After confrontation, I am so in love with myself that I take the necessary action to correct that which displeases me. The same applies for my Sisters. I love you enough not to lie to you. If I didn’t care, I wouldn’t say anything. It seems that we want to hear a beautiful lie instead of the ugly truth.

    Whatever I write about, is only applicable to the women that showcase the behavior, actions and mindset of my subject matter. If it doesn’t apply to you; you shouldn’t be offended. My concern is not what other races are involved in or how they act…..I am focused on taking care of IN HOUSE business; i.e. The Black Family, and my primary concern is the Black Woman.

    Whenever I post a picture, write an article, or post a link, I am often told “that’s just ONE black woman”. Well….all those women are adding up. However in that language, we discount the power we have as women. It only takes the womb(mental and physical)of ONE black woman to corrupt an entire nation and our children our living proof of that. This is why my focus has been, and will continue to be on the WOMAN.

  9. Mack says:

    Smh…

    Not only is the behavior of the two BLACK WOMEN in this video the norm, its become so because of those who refuse to speak out openly against it. If you’re a BLACK WOMAN, and you don’t make an obvious mark of demarcation between the behavior of these two beastly acting BLACK WOMEN from yourself, then you are by your silence in agreement with this image of your own womanhood.

    Now I have a question for some of you: when I used bold font in reference to BLACK WOMEN, did it offend you? If it did, then YOU ARE THE PROBLEM.

    See, this isn’t about black men. This is all about you BLACK WOMEN. We have to be equally as bold to challenge this level of ignorance as those who so boldly exhibit it. And as its been pointed out time and time again on this site as well as others, BLACK WOMEN as a collective detest being called out and exposed for their ignorance.

    Whats funny is: you never see white men standing in solidarity with folks like Jeffrey Dahmer. They don’t claim him as one of their own, nor do they deny the fact that most serial killers are white males. Facts are facts.

    But the second you call out the negative sickly behavior of most BLACK WOMEN…its the Crips vs. the Bloods. You’re accused of bashing…a personal favorite…hating your own mother; being gay; suffering from a short-man/tall man/fat man/skinny man complex; you’re ugly and can’t attract pretty women, or you’re pretty so must be on the DL; you shouldn’t be airing out our dirty laundry before the world…blahzay effing blah.

    In other words: the most vitriolic attacks are reserved for those who dare expose the BLACK WOMAN who has obviously gone stark raving mad over the last few decades. This sends the message: ‘If you expose us, we’re gonna hit you so hard with attacks that it’ll shame you into silence and scare others from sharing your views openly.’

    And if you’re dumb enough to accuse me of applying this to every BLACK WOMAN in America, do us all a huge favor: go up to the first cop you see, reach into your pocket and yell ‘I have a gun!’ And whatever the outcome, its what you deserve for being an idiot.

  10. Dcarter910 says:

    Intelligent, morally rich black people are being out bread 10 to 1. People say this is the exception but truth be told, intelligent, respectful, hardworking black people are the exception. That’s the truth that no one here wants to admit. This is the norm from black people.

  11. Thetruthtold says:

    How did the Black Women get to this point?
    Can we blame the Black Man?
    Why are there no Solutions just Critics?
    Who are the biggest critic of this Group of Humans?
    Can this mindset be consider a pandemic or and epidemic?
    Can this mindset be in this group of humans like A.I.D.S.
    I AM GRIVED

  12. Thetruthtold says:

    How did the black woman get to this place? Is the black man is not to blame? How do we correct this behavior? List some Solution. A group of humans who stands out for critics. Who are the biggest Critics of this group of humans?

  13. Ramses says:

    And since I get harassed for “bashing black women” here’s a video from the news showing two black men stealing $69,000 worth of chicken for a superbowl party. LOl!!!!!!!!!! But I’m sure black people have a plan waiting to save these people. These dudes stealing from their own jobs!!!!!! lol good luck with your save black people programs like you’re having a save the whale campaign!!!! Sudanese need saving, black people a brain transplant!!!! lol

  14. Mxolisi says:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lko0dnShwoA

    David Spate: a much needed and impressive voice of sanity in the wake of the Atlanta security guard’s confrontation with two irate women/mothers.

  15. Ramses says:

    No doubt @Papacool…and I saw the second video as well and I don’t know which one was worse but I can say this: the female and both males exhibited the same behavior. They both showed a disregard for authority. And what was so interesting was the fact that the same criminal element that wears “Stop Snitching” T shirts and who hate the police were the very same element who were talking about they were gonna get the police involved!!! Lol….The skinny dude threatened to bust the security guard ( a black man) in the head with it while this same guard held a gun (instead of a taser) aiming it at both of them. Then the black chick comes along and looks inside the barrel to see if it was bullets in the chamber!!! What person would look inside the barrel of a gun when someone is ready to use it? But I can guarantee you that is it was a white officer, these things would not have gone down at all. That “cracker” black people claim they hate would be the same “cracker” getting the utmost respect. Brother just trying to do his job and is getting hate. I don’t see how black men survive in this land. White folks hate him. His so-called people hate him. I mean how is he supposed to win? Lol!!!!! This stuff is asinine for real. Good luck brothers seriously. Good luck out here trying to keep your peace.

  16. Papacool says:

    Once again we get a visual of a day in the life. If one chooses to go into a public venue, one must abide by the rules and listen when directed by one of authority to do whatever is asked of you. When emotions are introduced into the mix, you have just witnessed the result. America is starting to let the hype become the norm. Everytime I view the news, there will always be a story of someone getting out of control. Just goes to show you that we will always have someone contribute to stereotypical behaviors that will further support negativity. The main point that is missed is that once again it is a Black on Black situation. After all is said and done no one has been made accountable for the situation and we are left to judge who was right and who was wrong, when the whole thing could and should have been avoided. Back in the day, people stayed on good behavior and demonstrated courtesy towards one another as RESPECT was the operative word. Now we have to simply accept shocking incidences such as this as being normal. If the children were truly being thought of, this whole thing would not have happened if the main focal point was to serve as an example. I also saw the second video to this and seen where the two brothers kept provoking the security brother and even went as far as to threaten him and talk back to him in a derogatory fashion. In the end we are crazy to have to wonder why people end up getting shot or killed for no reason at all that could be justified. We can all do better, but we have to be real in accepting the fact that we can not do everything on our own. Help us Lord Jesus in this time of need. Peace out/AMEN. Papacool.

  17. Ramses says:

    As usual another dude with a cape….after all I wrote you never addressed the heart of the matter in typical fashion….and to this statement “However they didn’t agree w/ the fact that the writer called for reform of “the black woman” as a whole. My wife does not need reform. My daughter, mother and neice do not need reform. In fact, I know countless women who are educated, intelligent and grounded. As a nation, we are the only group who down each other in a holistic matter for what the few do.” Clearly no one is talking about these particular types of women. If these women in your family are civilized like you say then the commentary is not meant for them!!!! Lol…..I mean which one is it? Either we have a problem as a so-called “community” or this behavior is more prevalent than not and if it’s not prevalent, then why does this website exist and have so many making comments on black folks behavior. How many black businesses are on the Fortune 500 list? That is a sign that something is obviously wrong. But as usual you get people on here saying “well not all black women are not like that.” Generalizations are fair because there is a whole industry devoted to it and it’s called “polling.” They take a sample group from a particular segment of the population and get a general idea of how people view certain topics, issues, and sometimes candidates. I know there are “some” decent black women. I have them in my family. But it doesn’t prevent me from speaking on those who outweigh them numbers wise. You have a black woman who critiques black women on here (as well as men). However, because she has a woman’s perspective, she speaks from the vantage point of a woman. Yet you have men who feel the need to defend the indefensible. I have more respect for this sister who has admitted to her own mistakes, and be willing to call other women out because women like this make it harder for like her to be with black men who run across women who turn out to be like the woman in the video. It seems like black people want to hear only what they want to hear. If you criticize the negative of a stranger black person, then the typical response from the average black person is to take offense by the criticisms laid out (check Bill Cosby). He put black people in a positive light and black people said “that’s not realistic. Black people don’t live like that.” So why complain then. “No one sticks up for us” is what black people say. But a black man shows you a black family structure on tv, where even white people watched the show, and you still complain? Defending black people only means excusing their negative behavior? When you are in a relationship with people, sometimes that person is your mirror, in which they reflect back to you what you give off. When they give you constructive criticisms about yourself, it’s out of love. Now some people are too uncivilized to take it as such. So they view it as an attack and lash out. But the civilized person will take it, reflect on it, and if they really love and respect the person they are with, they will thank them and appreciate them for their criticism and love. Because you have to ask yourself this one question: who loves me more? The person who lets me have my way or the person who attempts to correct my behavior? If you don’t believe the person you’re with is attempting to harm you, then you can’t say their doing you’re wrong when they give you criticism. And since they are trying to help you better coexist with them, then wouldn’t it display the proper etiquette to embrace what they say and try to improve in whatever area needs improving? Instead of saying “well other women do it.” Because last time I checked, when you compare sisters to other black women, the first thing out their mouths are “don’t compare me to other women I’m my own woman.” Now all of a sudden people criticize your personal behavior now other groups of women do it too. In sister Muhammad’s word this is what is referred to as “deflection.” It’s like a car with tent on it. It rejects light so you can’t see the real person inside. Either you are your own woman or you’re like everybody else and if this type of woman in the video is not you, then why is your argument “not all black women are like this?” Because I don’t believe her argument was that all black women are like this. I think her point was that too many black women are like this. So clearly, some of you have missed the point or either trying to change the argument on purpose. Which one is it?

  18. Brandon Wilson says:

    Smdh…

    This is really sad. As a man, what really sickens me is that the brotha stood by and allowed that foolishness to continue in front of “his babies” and not speak. Where do the women come from?!

    SOMEONE should’ve taken charge their… Ideally it would’ve been the brotha.

    However I don’t see where either Michelle, Mxolisi or Jazzie were defending this women. All of them understood that (at least from what I was reading) the writer’s offense and outrage. I hope to believe the all agree that it was foolishness. However they didn’t agree w/ the fact that the writer called for reform of “the black woman” as a whole. My wife does not need reform. My daughter, mother and neice do not need reform. In fact, I know countless women who are educated, intelligent and grounded. As a nation, we are the only group who down each other in a holistic matter for what the few do… And (correct me if I’m wrong) but I think that’s what Michelle was saying. If brothas can get mad at sistas saying “there are no good men…”, I think our sistas have the right to stand against being clumped in w/ women like this. Our white brothers and sisters don’t look at shows like Jackass, Girls gone wild, 16 and pregnant or any other reality TV show and say “the white woman” needs reform. They understand ignorance for ignorance, but they don’t make blanket statements about themselves as a whole.

    As a community, I’d like to see us be able to dialogue respectfully, view each others point of views objectively and respond like adults. We can disagree without attacking.

  19. Ramses says:

    This is unbelievable lol….yet funny….this is my biggest problem right here. No doubt I have a problem with this chick exhibiting this socially degenerate behavior. However, my biggest problem is that even when you show these chicks on a video clearly demonstrating this type of behavior that I talk about all the time, you have females like Michelle Williams or Mxoxli making the comments they do. It’s not an attack when you critique wretched behavior in a social setting. There was a time where your parents, grandparents, and neighbors would have put a boot up your behind when you acted out of order in public. Yet as usual, we have females who defend females solely on gender. This is feminism at its finest. Men do wrong, he supposed to know better. Female does wrong, “leave her alone she doesn’t know better.” Lol….. I expect a little bit more refinement from women who claim they’re “educated.” But it’s clear many women lack an education in social etiquette. I am reading a book on social etiquette published in 1924. I wanted to know if there were any books on Social Etiquette, something my great grandparents taught us (my extended family), so that we wouldn’t be not only an embarrassment to our family, but offensive to other people in public. Social etiquette was so important that people wrote books on this stuff all the time back in the day. For those who come from disadvantaged backgrounds, it would do you well to listen to those people like myself who were raised with some “hometraining” (etiquette). Listen to the words from this lady.

    “The perfect lady is not the ornamental butterfly of society, as so many would have us believe. She is gentle, and well-dressed and graceful–not merely ornamental. She does some useful work, no matter what it is. She is patient always always, and generous. She never speaks harshly to tradespeople or to servants (people in public on their jobs); She is never haughty, never superior. She is kind and courteous to everyone, and she conducts herself with the calm, unassuming grace that instinctively wins a responsive respect. In her manner towards men she is reserved, modest. But she is self-reliant and not afraid to assert herself. Her speech and manner are characterized always by dignity, repose and self-confidence. It is only by knowing the laws of good conduct, and by following them faithfully, that one can hope ever to become a true gentleman or a true lady.

    Every man who so wishes may become a gentleman, and every woman may become a lady in every sense of the word. It requires only the cultivation of those qualities outlined above. And it is here that the use of etiquette lies, that the importance of good manners is most strikingly portrayed.

    Etiquette teaches you how to be gentle, calm, patient. It tells you how to be at ease among strangers. It tells you how to be at ease among strangers. It tells you how to cultivate grace, poise, self-confidence. Not only does it tell you how, but it gives you poise and self-confidence. By teaching you the right thing to do at the right time, it eliminates all possibility of mistakes–and hence all embarrassment and awkwardness vanish.

    The existence of these fixed social laws, these little rules of etiquette, makes it easy for the man and woman who have not been bred in the best society, to master the knowledge which will enable them to enter that society and mingle with the most highly cultivated people without feeling embarrassed or uncomfortable. It tears down the barriers between the wealthy and the poor, between the educated and the ignorant. By knowing what to do and say and write and wear on all occasions, under all conditions, any man or woman can enter any society and mingle with any people. The old proverb might well be changed to read, “Culture makes the whole world kin!”

    Of course if a man suddenly became wealthy and he wished to enter the highest society, his wealth might serve as an opening. But he would soon find that money was not enough–that he needed manners. He might mingle with soceity for years, slowly acquiring the correct table manners, the correct mode of address, the correct manner of making introductions, the correct way to conduct himself at all times, in all places. But it would take many years before the rough edges of his previous uncultivated manners were rubbed away. Instead of waiting for years of contact with cultured people to bring him the correct manners befitting a man of wealth, he need only learn at once from a dependable authority the etiquette of society, the good form that has been crystallized into rules after years of social intercourse. it is the easiest road to social success.

    It is a mistake to think that good manners are meant for the elaborate ball room or for the formal dinner. Society is not necessarily too formal or too “showy.” Society implies also that society of fellowmen you meet every day of the year–people you come into contact with in the social and business worlds. And in order to make contact with these people agreeable and pleasant, in order to win the admiration and humiliation because of bad blunders at most conspicuous moments, it is essential to know what is right and what is wrong.

    Good manners will enable you to be easy and graceful at all times. You will be able to mingle with the most cultured people and be perfectly at ease. You will lose all self-consciousness, all timidity. And instead you will become dignified, well-poised, calm. Instinctively people will respect you; in business and in society you will find yourself welcomes and admired.

    Etiquette is like the binding of a book–just as the binding reveals reveals the name of the book, and protects the valuable pages that are inside, so does etiquette reveal the breeding and culture of an individual, and protect him from the disrespect, ridicule and snubs of the world.

    Etiquette will make you dignified. It will make your actions and speech refined, polished, impressive. It will make you a leader instead of a follower, a participant instead of a looker-on. It will open the doors of the highest society to you, make you immune to all embarrassment, enable you to conduct yourself with ease and confidence at all times, under all circumstances.

    The rewards of etiquette are too numerous to recount. If you follow the laws of good conduct, if you do only what is right and in good form, you will find yourself an acknowledged leader, an acknowledged success, no matter in what station of life you may be. The world is quick to perceive good manners, just as it is quick to perceive the blunders in etiquette. If you study the rules of good conduct, and follow good form in everything you do and say, you will become courteous and kind and well-mannered. Etiquette will attract people to you, make you and your home a center of social activity. But most of all, it will make you respect yourself. And that is more important than riches or fame–for self-respect is the only thing that brings true happiness.

    Remember the words of the prophet, “He who respects himself will earn the respect of all the world.”

    Now if you consider yourself a woman of class and sophistication, there is no way you can defend this behavior. The sister Muhammad is not putting black men on a pedastool, although there is nothing wrong with putting good ones on it since other women do it for their men. The brother said he has seen women like this who are “educated” allegedly. My grandmother says “you might be a woman, but not all women can be ladies.” No matter if you are poor or rich, there is an expectation that you carry yourself with class and display the proper etiquette in a social setting. Now it’s clear this female was not bred well. The woman who wrote this book was white, yet my grandmother holds the same values, and was not born into a wealthy family money wise. But their values were the same. The only sisterhood or brotherhood that exists out here is proper values. You won’t see me marry a woman who is a crackhead, even if she is black. Why? Because she hates herself and does not value herself so how could she value me? Try loving someone who doesn’t love themselves and see how far you go. You’ll sisters would do very well to listen to this sister because she’s trying to help you. And let me show you how the scripture backs up this woman’s book in the following:

    A serpent may bite when it is
    not charmed
    The babbler is no different
    The words of a wise man’s
    mouth are gracious,
    But the lips of a fool
    shall swallow him up
    The words of his mouth begin
    with foolishness
    And the end of his talk is raving
    madness.
    A fool also multiplies words.
    No man knows what is to be;
    Who can tell tell him what will be
    after him?
    The labor of fools wearies them.
    For they do not even know how to go to the city! Ecclesiastes 10;11-15

    WOW!!!!! etiquette is a spiritual science. All day every day. When you look down upon people, it’s because of their behavior they display. It’s class all day. And to bring this home here’s more:

    Because of laziness the
    building (the human body) decays,
    And through idleness of hands the house leaks.
    A feast is made for laughter,
    And wine makes merry;
    But money answers everything. Ecclesiastes 10;18-19

    The human body is the building the scripture refers to. Man’s body is the measurement of the universe. “As above so below.” From the soles of man’s feet to the top of his head, man’s body mimics the the galactical calendar known as the Zodiac. Everyone has the God gene but not all are strong enough spiritually to remove the garbage and let this gene manifests itself and because they aren’t they continue coming back to this physical realm reliving the same life experience over and over again. You don’t ascend like Jesus did. Jesus giving away his flesh was symbolic of him leaving the animal lusts behind and embracing the spiritual essence of his father. His death was a symbolic death. He killed the human experience so he could experience the God experience. He even told his disciples that he would teach them the things he did (performing miracles) so when he left they would be able to do them as well. Why would Jesus say this to his disciples if they did not have the capabilities to do such things? Now this type of talk is well above the thought grade of many of you because you allow yourselves to be spiritually blocked by garbage on tv and amongst you and there is a lot of filth out here. But it’s still no excuse. God is more powerful than filth and for those who go to church and yet still don’t take heed then it’s even worse because you should know better. I’ve gotten attacked on here because I’m too harsh. Lol…. however, one thing you can’t say about me is that I don’t read. The more i read this etiquette book, the more I can hear my great grandparent’s voices. They never made excuses and never used not having a lot of money as an excuse to carry oneself without etiquette. I suggest people stop looking at themselves as a collective, and begin to look at themselves as individuals when it comes to personal responsibility because if you did that, then you could come together and build with one another. But if you won’t take responsibility for your personal behavior, you will be shunned socially and will be forced to deal with the know good dregs of society and procreate with them. And that is a scary thought especially after seeing the video of the chick above. Sad indeed. As usual long comment, but very necessary

  20. Mxolisi says:

    Please allow this Atlanta video to serve as one more “comment” relative to the dysfunction manifesting itself in our “communities” without regard to gender: http://www.ajc.com/news/news/local/georgia-dome-stabbing-suspect-says-mob-was-trying-/nT9FX/.

  21. Mxolisi says:

    While the video speaks a certain message about this particular incident, and it does have implications for what goes on in too many instances in our “communities,” the perspectives of the writer of the text is another thing. My greatest discomfort is with Nojma’s blanket indictment of Black Women and (in the tone of her comments) blanket placement of Black Men on some sort of pedestal. The video shows members of both gender standing by, either in fear or being entertained, rather than making any effort to let sanity be the solution. * * * WE have serious, urgent work to do!!!

  22. sankofa says:

    Once again…. pearls, meet swine’s feet! Smdh!

    Sister Nojma often says that when the knee-grow female’s bad behavior is exposed, she deflects and talks about (1) the knee-grow male (2) Yurugu’s females (3) other ethnic groups (4) Martians (5) the new world order (6) or anything else to deflect from the fact that the shit should be dealt with at the moment. Here is a classic case of watching the finger pointing instead of watching where the finger is pointing.

  23. Mxolisi says:

    No doubt about it: The “mothers” were WAY out of line. And the children, obviously, are learning some deeply dysfunctional stuff. We are likely to read negative stuff about them or house them behind bars someday in our lifetime. How many multiples of this insanity is feeding the future throughout our “communities”? * * * The security guard, it seems to me, is not without fault, even if his stun gun action might seem justifiable. I think he had a chance to difuse the situation when there was distance between himself and the women (before the tasing) rather than go back toward them to make sure he was the one getting the last word in. The dysfunction runs DEEP!! * * * There will likely be further deadly dysfunctional activity related to this incident, if it hasn’t already gone down. * * * We’ve got WORK to do!!!

  24. Ramses says:

    I rest my case

  25. Jazzie Dixson says:

    The behavior of both women is ABSOLUTELY deplorable, no argument. The misplaced defense on the part of the baby daddy is equally ridiculous. The security guard should have tazed her much sooner. The saddest part is the presumption that because these two clowns were Black women, then all Black women must bear the shame. Untrue! If you have ever seen a po broke ass non-Black female do the same thing (and I have), it makes it no more acceptable. Ghetto behavior is not confined to Blacks, nor is it confined to women–as obviously demonstrated by the tired brother defending the crispy chick. The video puts on display the poverty of the spirit which leads to the mistaken assumption that acting like a rabid dog is okay. Honey boo boo and Snookie offer confirmation that low-brow comes in every race.

  26. Michelle Williams says:

    My issue isn’t in calling the behaviour out. It IS ignorance. There is NOTHING about this is ok! I was equally as disgusted to see this video as Im sure the writer was. That was never my point and (though I don’t see where/how) I apologize if that is what came across! My issue is in how can we lift each other up if we generalize each other??? I don’t understand how that is productive? If I see a black man walking down the street, pants sagging, cursing, grabbing his crotch and disrespecting those around him, I wouldn’t dare group all black men together! As an educator, If I stand on a soap box and attack my young black girls, they are going to become embittered and reject everything I say. But if I make it a point to lovingly show them how they SHOULD carry themselves, teach them why this behaviour is unacceptable then I have given them to tools to be successful. As a people we already have an entire world system that is against us, tearing us down, generalizing us, holding us back that I am sincerely greived when I see us attacking and then writing each other off!

    IMO, there are simply more productive ways to approach change.

  27. natalie says:

    Excellent article!!!!

  28. Morgan says:

    Wonderful article, ma’am.

    It is very nice to see a Black woman come out and say “Black women, we need to stop acting like this.”

    I’ve seen college educated women act the same way as that woman did, believe it or not. It’s not just the underclass; even the middle class/upper class Black women feel the need to show out sometimes.

    It’s tough to hear messages like “As a Black man, you need to respect/protect Black women,” and see things like this.

  29. Realman says:

    This is also an examlpe of the wide spread mental illness that goes on the black community .This sickness and dysfunction is so common now it has become the norm. I’m not excusing this woman’s behavior at all but this is the sort of garbage that many promote in the black community. Its the same crap we see on reality TV. Personally I have never seen any white, asian, hispanic or any non black people act this way.

  30. Nicodemus says:

    @Michelle Williams,
    This behavior is unacceptable an your seasaw view of the world needs to stop. You mention nothing of the bad parenting in front of these already ruined kids. Please be quiet, women like you enable and support this grossly and sad behavior.
    Had this bro been a white man, he would not have has this problem. The writer if this article has a fb page. She is 100% woman

  31. black yoda says:

    Excellent article. Don’t ever let these feminists break you down. There are plenty of sites that will push the kind of garbage Michelle would enjoy reading. You’re one of the few voices out here telling it like it is.

  32. natalie says:

    Misogyny still means the hatred of women right…? I am saddened by the depths of society’s feminist indoctrination and the overuse/misuse of such words. Struggling to see the misogyny in this post..

  33. Michelle Williams says:

    Edit: Due to the blatant (what I assumed to be) misogynistic view of this article, I mistakenly called the writer a man…

    I am ever sadder to see that it is a woman…
    This causes me even more grief and makes me resolve all the more to genuinely pray that I NEVER take the position to turn my noise up at spit at those… specifically those that I share an ancestory AND gender with but instead use all of my frustration and angst to teach and uplift.

  34. Michelle Williams says:

    Sir,

    I do hope that while you have generalized our race and gender, minimized us as a whole due to the actions of a few that you realize that your article has done more to cause division than to actually address the issue here.

    And once again, I am disappointed at Calvin for allowing this to be published… I am slowly loosing respect for this site and for Mr. Adams.

    Where is the same uproar when black women are disrespected by black men? When we are vilified, objectified, disrespected and abused? Where is the call for the reformation of the black man?

    The issue is not with the black woman as a whole. The issue is with ignorance.. which can come in any race or gender. I have seen white women, latina women, asian women all act in similar ignorance. I have seen black men, white men, asian men, hispanic men, all share the same weaknesses… the issue isn’t the race…. it is the ignorance.

    Articles written like this sadden me.. not because you are calling out an issue. But because you are doing so in division. You can not build up by tearing down. You can not correct while generalizing.

    As a black woman, who loves and supports black men, who is raising a respectful intelligent black boy and who longs to see peace amongst our race, I sincerely hope that we not only address the ignorance within our race… but the Pharisaic scoffing that is so quickly done in these situations.

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