Thursday, March 28, 2024

Who You Calling A BITCH? ( Part 1 )

June 26, 2012 by  
Filed under News, Opinion, Relationships, Sista Talk, Weekly Columns

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(ThyBlackMan.com) Last week I posted the following status on my personal facebook page:

“The fastest and most effective way for men to respect Women is when we as WOMEN start respecting OURSELVES FIRST.The fastest and most effective way for men to protect Women is when we as WOMEN become  WORTHY of protection and PROACTIVE in our OWN protection. 

The fastest and most effective way for women to stop being looked at as sex objects is when we as Women stop seeing OURSELVES as sex objects. 

The fastest way and most effective way for men to stop having mistresses, jump off and side chicks is when we as women STOP VOLUNTEERING for those roles. 

The fastest and most effective way for men to desire to probe our minds, is if we as women PLACE our minds on display, INSTEAD of our bodies. 

The fastest and most effective way to shut down strip clubs is when we as WOMEN STOP STRIPPING!

The fastest and most effective way to shut down magazines such as “King” is when we as WOMEN STOP POSING for those types of magazines.

The fastest and most effective way for women’s asses to stop being shown on the video screen is when we as WOMEN STOP SHOWING OUR ASSES on the video screen. 

So in essence, as life begins with the WOMAN, life will be RENEWED with the Woman.”

 
A sister and I had a discussion about how women are portrayed in hip hop; basically she feels that hip hop is very misogynistic. This is my thing, if you’re going to have a discussion about hip hop and women, have an HONEST  discussion. Queen Latifah’s U.N.I.T.Y was the anthem back in the day! She asked WHO YOU CALLING A BITCH? Like you BETTER not be calling ME one…..but even listening to the song, the lyrics are as follows:
 
“Every time I hear a brother call a girl a bitch or a hoe
Trying to make a sister feel low
You know all of that gots to go
Now everybody knows there are exceptions to this rule
Now don’t be getting mad, when we playing, it’s cool “
 
See that last part, “when we playing, it’s cool“,  probably escaped most of us, because of the overall message, but it is never a cool time to call me a Bitch. I remember when all the blame was placed on Nelly for his “Tip Drill” video, because he slid a credit card down a Sister’s behind. Now what I find the MOST interesting is that it wasn’t even his idea! It was the SISTER’S IDEA, but somehow that went unnoticed. Now granted, he didn’t have to slide the credit card down her behind, but he would have never had the option to do so if SHE didn’t offer him her ass!
 
Let’s keep it one hundred. You can’t boycott Lil Wayne with his lyrics but you rocking Nicki’ Minaj (who is the self-proclaimed “female Lil Wayne“)” Silly Hoe” or any of her tracks.
 
“I get it crackin like a bad back
Bitch talkin she the queen, when she looking like a lab rat
I’m Angelina, you Jennifer
C’mon bitch, you see where Brad at”
 
Did you know in Trina’s “Baddest Bitch” part of the lyrics go a little something like this:
“See if I had the chance to be a virgin again
I’d be f****ing by the time I’m ten”
 
I remember that song playing when I was younger, what message did that send to my generation and have many from my generation have become MOTHERS, that still stand by that mantra? How many from this current generation will PROUDLY tell you they are the “Baddest Bitch?” Even Beyonce had to tell you “Ego so big, you must admit, I got every reason to feel like I’m that bitch”. When it comes to the rap game, WOMEN are bragging about what they can do sexually, WOMEN are degrading other WOMEN, WOMEN are WILLINGLY stripping and posing in videos. So how is misogyny in hip hop completely MALE based, when women are JUST as guilty?
 
I keep telling you that no one can teach you how to respect ME LIKE I CAN. I will give you the BEST BLUEPRINT on how to TREAT ME.  No one can teach you how to respect my womb LIKE I CAN. I lead by example. I command and DEMAND respect. I don’t give you the option to do otherwise. If you give a man the option to treat you in a certain manner, you have no right to get upset when he decides to exercise it.
 
Please stop trying to convince me that men “make” you jump offs, or mistresses or baby mama’s. It’s not going to work. No one can make you something that you haven’t already shown an interest in being.A man can’t “make” you his baby mama if YOU constantly have unprotected sex with him and you are not married. You’re rallying for the position of “baby mama” each time you lay down with him.

A man cannot “make” you his jump off, if YOU consistently give him “whenever he wants it sex“, without commitment.

A man cannot “make” you his mistress if YOU’RE OK with being the “other woman“.

Again, no one can make you what you already volunteered to be. The only qualification that you need to be a mistress, a sidepiece, or a jump off is the ability to creatively handle an erection. However, there are SEVERAL qualities needed to be a man’s wife and the MOST important is how to stimulate his MIND.

 
So Women, we have the power to shut all this down, but it will take a COLLECTIVE effort from all of us. You want to talk about supply and demand? How about we start DEMANDING respect and Men will have NO CHOICE but to SUPPLY us with the respect that we have demanded from them. I stand by everything I write, and if we as women want men to see us in a different light, then WE as women MUST STEP OUT OF THE DARKNESS!
 
If the condition of the world won’t change until the WOMAN is viewed properly, then the MINDS and how women see THEMSELVES  must be changed FIRST. “Where there are no decent WOMEN, there are no decent MEN.”
 
Staff Writer; Nojma Muhammad
 
To learn more about this talented sister, feel free to visit; Nojma Reflects.
 

Comments

7 Responses to “Who You Calling A BITCH? ( Part 1 )”
  1. Marlon says:

    real..accountability…dont look for respect until you respect self

  2. Quanda Major says:

    I like your post and

  3. Nojma says:

    Thank you P Money for your comment. @Camilla could you clarify what “marry out means”. I don’t want to assume. By marry out….do you mean marry other than Black Men? Again I just need clarity so I know how to respond. Thanks Sis. @Sankofa that quote is nothing but pure truth!

  4. sankofa says:

    “The greatest weapon in the hands of the oppressor is the mind of the oppressed”
    —-Steve Biko

  5. Realman says:

    More lost defective black people.

  6. Camilla says:

    From what I’ve noticed, the women who DO carry themselves with respect have to marry out.

  7. P Money says:

    This is very spot on for the woman with your mindset. However, there are a lot of women out there that want to be the girl on the side, or want to have a little fling with a man. It goes both ways. There are a lot of men out there who could take your advice as well.

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