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Dwayne McClary; Crayola in the Cradle…

September 8, 2011 by  
Filed under Fatherhood, Misc., News, Opinion, Relationships, Weekly Columns

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(ThyBlackMan.com) On September 2, 2011 at 1:24 AM, God blessed my wife and me with a happy, healthy, beautiful, baby boy.  Upon our return to the recovery room, I began my massive digital announcement campaign, consisting of text messages, emails, and mobile phone calls to alert family and close friends that the baby had arrived six weeks early, but safely and soundly.  Because it was in the wee hours of Friday morning, the onslaught of replies and return phone calls didn’t start until six hours later.  As my wife and I fielded the responses from excited family members, mainly from the South, the comments and questions were all identical and asked in the same exact order. 

Congratulations!  Was it a boy or a girl?  What’s his name?  How much did he weigh?  …..What color is he?”  Our responses remained just as consistent as the inquiries.  “Thank you.  A boy.  Myles Robinson McClary.  5 lbs.  ….Too soon to tell.”

Although everyone seemed satisfied and content with our other answers, the “too soon to tell” response, didn’t suffice for quite a few family members as they proceeded to inform us of the modern day “brown paper bag test,” one that  determines the baby’s final shade.  “Check his knuckles, knees, elbows, or ears and that will tell you how dark the baby will be,” they said with the same level of assurance as Albert Einstein and his theory of relativity.

Both my wife and I come from two solid, African-American heritages.  The complexion of our family tree roots are very diverse, just like in most black  lineages, ranging from light-skinned (or pronounced skin-ded by many south of the Mason Dixon), red, yellow, dark brown to blue black.  My wife describes my shade as caramel and I would compare her to a mocha frappuccino that Starbucks makes.  After forwarding a digital photo of Myles to a few folks, we were both asked repeatedly, “How did you two make such a red baby?”

I no longer think that we live in the Dorothy Dandridge and Lena Horne epitome of black beauty era, where all colors between the peach crayon and the desert sand colored one were considered safe and attractive; while the chocolate, black, and purple colors were removed from the Crayola box.  Because of brothers like Michael Jordan, Wesley Snipes and Big Daddy Kane, many years later those crayons were accepted and placed back in.  However, I do think that African-Americans are still unnecessarily shade conscious.  I hardly believe that proud new mommas and poppas from other races are turning back the ears of their newborns to determine whether they’ll match an olive or tangerine colored crayon.

It’s proven that colorism plays a part in the job hiring process, police treatment, black fraternity and sorority selection, and on many other levels of our society.  What’s more upsetting is that even while Myles was departing my wife’s womb, his skin tone was already coming under question.  I guess the next inquiry from relatives would’ve been, “Does he have good hair?”

We’ve heard this argument for generations that as long as we continue to uphold these shade sub-divisions within our own race, we will remain segregated as a people.  Because shade chart analysis is so deeply rooted within our culture and has such a long standing history, it’s going to be extremely difficult for us not to ask such audacious questions like “what color is he?”  As I now reflect, my wife and I could’ve answered that question differently.  A better response from us would’ve been, “Black.  The same color that he’ll always be.”  That answer will remind the one asking the question, just how much that is a “house vs. field slave” inquiry.  We are no longer on the plantation, but haven’t totally exonerated ourselves from that “masta mentality.”  To ask what color is he before asking is he healthy; is a true indication that our priorities as a people need adjusting.  It’s time for us to realize that Black encompasses every shade of the entire African-American spectrum.  The 31 flavors of Black people’s Baskin-Robbin needs to be consolidated into one big, strong, united scoop!  Once we learn to embrace this train of thought, we’ll then reap the rewards of the pot of gold that sits at the end of this multi-shaded Black rainbow.

As Myles gets older, his appearance will undoubtedly evolve, but whatever shade he winds up, whether it is fudge, mahogany, coffee, or toffee, he’ll always only have one box to check off when filling out an application.

Staff Writer; Dwayne McClary

Feel free to connect with this brother via facebook; D. McClary.

 


Comments

5 Responses to “Dwayne McClary; Crayola in the Cradle…”
  1. Yep! And how about, “Is her hair going to stay like that?” Which is what I was told my Dad asked my Mom when I was born…

    I absolutely agree with Arthur!

    Nothing against you Dwayne, but I’ve seen so many blog posts and conversations lately on the black and white divide, black diaspora, to go natural or relaxed…and frankly, it’s tiring.

    Why should I be labeled “not black enough” for wearing my hair relaxed, or penalized because my skin is lighter? I thought we were past the issues of “colorism,” the “massa mentality” and the “brainwashing campaign”…can we move on?

    And maybe it’s fair to say that the very ones still harping on these issues are the same ones having the identity crisis!

    At the end of the day, God doesn’t give two hoots about what color our babies come out or if we choose to wear our hair natural or relaxed. He wants us to love ourselves and love each other.

    So can we start the healing process already?

    Veronica
    http://www.veronicainspires.com/about

  2. Nicholas says:

    Congratulations on the birth of your happy, healthy, beautiful baby boy.
    Thanks for sharing your joy with us all.

    Myles is fortunate to have be born of such aware parents.

  3. Kwei Quartey says:

    I’m really very surprised that the relatives of the new parents actually asked what color their baby was. That’s just bizarre.

  4. Giosincere says:

    Wow. This is a very serious topic but I couldn’t help chuckling at the fact that you wrote “I no longer think that we live in the Dorothy Dandridge and Lena Horne epitome of black beauty era,”
    It’s sad that we live where live in our minds. Still oppressed. Still stuck in the belief that light is better than dark 3b hair is better than 4a hair. United we stand. Divided we fall. We’ve already fell. When we are going to rise from this nonsense.

  5. Arthur says:

    “Colorism” is a way of dividing, conquering and ultimately deranging people.

    You can never be light enough or dark enough. There is no such thing as the right color. As a recent eloquent post explained, those who are lighter often feel estranged from the mass of Black people.

    Whites are affected by the same neurosis. Just as many Blacks use chemicals to look lighter, many whites try to tan and look darker both with deadly results. Look at Hitler, the pre-eminent white racists. He, himself, did not have the blond hair and blue eyes he held in such high regard and look at the nightmare he thus unleashed upon the world.

    As for people getting jobs or positions because of the color of their skin, that just points up the absolute need for us to create businesses and enterprises not controlled by the very forces that are destroying us. I know we have been exposed to relentless brainwashing for 400 years, and that is not our fault. But we have to try our best not to give voice to the demons embedded in our heads, lest they reinforce similar evil forces in the minds of others. It is a centerpiece of Christianity and all religion that we are all equal, bar none.

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