Dr. Boyce Watkins; Mary J. Blige, Yes Past Drug Abuse…

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(ThyBlackMan.com) I recently read an article about the amazing singer, Mary J. Blige, and how molestation at an early age played a role in some of her poor choices later in life.  After confronting the demons of drug and alcohol addiction, Mary J. stands as arguably the most inspirational songbird in America, with a following more loyal than any artist within a 3,000 mile radius.

I saw Mary J at the Essence Music Festival in 2004, and was impressed with the way she “brought it” to the stage.  I haven’t been back to the Essence  Festival since, in large part because I am hoping that they can find better empowerment speakers than Nene Leakes (just kidding….no, not really).

With regard to Mary J’s revelation about prior molestation, I found myself reflecting on just how many stories of abuse within our communities go untold.  I think about all the defenseless children, both male and female, who were victimized by the adults they trusted with their lives.  I also thought about how many of us can be unintentionally complicit in the abuses that occur right under our noses. 

How often have you heard a story about an older man who has slept with or impregnated a girl under the age of 18?  Do you find yourself financing the R. Kelly empire by shaking your butt to his music without spending a second thinking about all the young women who claim that he is trying to sleep with them?  Have you ever seen signs of abuse in either a woman or child in your presence, but chose not to get involved?  If the answer is “yes” to these questions or others like them, you might want to consider stepping up your game.

Unfortunately, a large number of children are parented by irresponsible baby-making machines who don’t know the first thing about raising productive kids or protecting them.  Men like Flava Flav, DMX and others (who’ve battled drug addiction and poor choices) almost always seem to be the ones who have the most children, taking one generation of dysfunction and spreading it like a virus into the future. 

The truth is that it not only takes a village for us to raise our children, it also takes a village to protect them.   While we can’t control the actions of reckless adults, we can all do our part to share our values, provide resources whenever we can and do all we can to protect children who’ve been cursed by the disease of poor parental protection.  There are tens of thousands of other Mary J. Bliges out there, and unfortunately, their stories don’t have an equally happy ending.

Staff Writer; Dr. Boyce Watkins

Dr. Boyce Watkins is the founder of the Your Black World Coalition. For more information, please visit http://BoyceWatkins.com.