(ThyBlackMan.com) They just don’t go together. Never have; never will.
With my years of dating and relationship experience, I never knew sex and long-term relationships went together. Never. I’m not sure if I should even type them together in the same post.
Intimacy and monogamy seem to be hot topics among infidelity – the irony. According to a recent report, researchers surveyed 3,240 men and 3,304 
women who were married, living with a partner or in a relationship, asking them about their satisfaction with their sex lives. A majority of men (54 percent) and nearly as many women (42 percent) said they were unhappy with the frequency of sex.
Although the study did not offer any ground shattering discoveries, the point of intimacy and monogamy seem to still be an issue for couples face. The study found for most men, the complaint was that they were not having sex often enough. Among women who were unhappy about the frequency of their sex lives, two-thirds said they weren’t having enough sex, but a third complained they were having more sex than they wanted.
Like the statistics presented above, there are many studies released frequently when it comes to sexual patterns and sexual relationships. Some of these studies factor in sexual orientation, length of relationships and even race. The underlining innuendos are always consistent. I wish someone would pay me to waste time conduct some surveys.
For anyone who has ever been in a long-term relationship, you know sex is just not on top of the list anymore. If your boyfriend has never told you this, then I will assume the duty. No matter the dynamics of the relationship when you involve two different people, you’re going to get two different sex drives. I haven’t been in a relationship yet where the sex drives were equal. I had to face the fact my partner might not want to drop the draws when I wanted to and vice versa. I learned to respect that about someone I’m with over a certain period of time. Yes, a certain period of time. At the beginning of a relationship, I’m not sure how open I would be. There’s no get out-of-sex-free card. I want sex when I want it. I’m selfish in the bedroom I can admit that. So if your partner hasn’t said anything to you about it remember you have me.
Boink.
The growth of relationships like living organisms develop through a process starting with conception and birth, and then cycle through stages of growth, maturity, sometimes regeneration and eventually death. Transitioning through the timeline of a relationship presents different wants and needs. At the beginning of the relationship your wants and needs change. As time progresses, your wants and needs should change. Factors like dependability, physical attractiveness, sense of humor, education, ambition and financial stability change. We all have our laundry list on what we look for in a mate. Just insert those qualities above. Check. Check. Plus.
Intimacy is a complicated entity when it comes to relationships. If you really want your relationship to work and to achieve a high level of intimacy outside of the physical in your relationship, you’ll need to know and understand each other much better than you did at the beginning.
A healthy long-term relationship is something to applaud. I can respect a quality long-term relationship. Compromising your relationship because of sex would be foolish. Figure out ways to stimulate your partner. Try some different approaches. Communicate your needs and don’t nag. Communication is a huge factor, as well as respect. You’re not going to always get what you want when you want it.
No matter if the relationship has been going on for years or even a few months, you have to ask yourself how important is sex in your relationship at that stage? Are you willing to respect your partner’s body? When does sex become a deal breaker?
Staff Writer; Drew-Shane
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